Toilet Violations Punishment Committee

[Arnold Ziffel]

Welcome to a session of the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee (TVPC) – this writer’s favorite fantasy. The story takes place in a high school not unlike other high schools. In this high school, however, there are strict rules regarding the toileting behavior of the school’s female students. Those who break the school toilet rules (including the rules against going to the bathroom in your pants) are brought before the TVPC to have their cases heard and their punishment given out if they are guilty. Meetings of the TVPC are called to order at 3:10 PM each school day in the TVPC meeting room – Room 222 of the high school. It should be noted that where this story takes place you need to be 18 in order to enter high school so all persons depicted, even though entirely fictional, are at least 18 years of age.

My name is Arnold Ziffel and I’m chairman of the TVPC. What follows are the summary minutes of the TVPC meeting of February 24, 2012.

Our first case of this afternoon’s session of the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee (TVPC) is a shy and quiet blonde-haired freshman named Tia. As she usually does when she appears before the TVPC, the shy and sensitive freshman is already crying as she takes the podium. And as is usually the case when Tia appears before the TVPC, she is charged with messing in her panties. The substantial load in her panties is quite evident by the large round bulge it causes even in her loose fitting jeans. Obviously, she is embarrassed by the load in her panties and it’s hard not to feel sorry for the sweet and painfully shy freshman. But this is her 6th panty-soiling offense of this school year and the time for leniency is long past.

“Again Tia?” I ask her, “Didn’t you just recently finish your punishment from the last one and here you are with yet another panty-soiling?” “You keep telling me that you’re trying to do better, but you still keep going in your panties,” I point out, “But 6 times already this school year is quite shameful.” “When are you going to learn to go in the toilet like a girl your age should?” I ask.

“This is the third time it’s happened in my class alone,” chimes in Miss Johnson, Tia’s English teacher, “And that’s just the times that I’ve caught her at it.” “And who’s to even know how many times she’s done it and didn’t even get caught,” Miss Johnson points out. “Tia just refuses to go in the toilet like she should,” her English teacher tells us, “I’ve tried to give her a girls’ room pass on numerous occasions but she just insists that she doesn’t have to go.” “I could see her just sitting there in class desperately trying to hold it in,” she continues, “But when I suggest that she go to the girls’ room, she refuses and then a little while later it’s usually in her pants.” “I know that some girls have trouble with using the school bathrooms, so I try to help them,” the kindly young teacher adds, “But Tia doesn’t even seem to want my help – She just sits there and does it in her pants.” “I guess it isn’t intentional, because she probably is trying to hold it in when it happens,” Miss Johnson tells us, “But it’s pretty obvious that she’d rather just do it in her pants and clean it up at home than do it in the toilet at school.”

“It wasn’t on purpose – I was trying to hold it in,” Tia mumbles through her tears, “I was trying as hard as I could to hold it in.” “I would never just do it in my pants on purpose – That’s just disgusting,” she argues emphatically, “I hate having messes in my panties – I really hate how that feels.” “Apparently you don’t hate it enough to stop doing it,” I point out, “Apparently you don’t hate it enough to start doing it in the girls’ room instead of your panties.” “I guess we believe you that you’re always trying to hold it in,” I explain, “But the point is that you shouldn’t be – You should be going to the girls’ room instead and taking care of your business in there.” “A few accidents here and there can be expected – especially for a freshman,” I tell her, trying to be a little comforting, “But you don’t seem to go to the girls’ room at all – You don’t seem to be making any attempt to improve your shameful toilet habits.” Upon questioning, Tia admits that she’s never actually done one of her bowel movements in the school girls’ rooms. “I’ve done the other thing in there, but never that,” she admits. She claims that a few times she sat down in the girls’ room intending to do it, but that she just couldn’t actually go. “I just don’t like having other girls around when I do that,” she tells us, “And even when I do have the girls’ room to myself, I’m always worried about other girls coming in while I’m going.” “It’s not just at school,” Tia explains, “I really don’t like to do that in any public bathroom.”

“You’re just going to have to,” I tell the freshman cutie, “You’re just going to have to find a way to go at school when you need to.” Upon further questioning, Tia acknowledges that though she does try to hold it in when she has to go at school and really does hate having those messy loads in her panties, she does indeed feel more comfortable cleaning up her mess at home than using the toilet in the girls’ room at school.”

“I’m afraid that’s going to change, young lady,” I tell her in no uncertain terms, “And I’m afraid that’s going to change right now!” I first sentence the toilet troubled freshman to write 1,000 times, “I will not soil my panties in school again.” Second, I sentence her to both a week of detention and 2 weeks of her 7th period study hall sitting on a toilet in the Main Corridor girls’ room. That’s pretty harsh, but I’m pretty sure she was expecting that. She was expecting that and she still messed in her panties, so I doubt that’s going to be a sufficient deterrent against her doing it again. “I warned you last time that there would be stern consequences if you did it again,” I remind her, “But obviously, you did indeed mess in your panties again.” “So just as obviously, the time for stern consequences is at hand,” I tell her, “This time we’re going to try a different type of punishment – And hopefully, it’s going to be a punishment you’ll think about the next time you need to do a bowel movement in school.”

With that I request that our ace hall and bathroom monitor Mrs. Johns accompany Tia down the hall to the 2nd Floor girls’ room. “Once in the girls’ room with Mrs. Johns, you will proceed to clean up your mess,” I tell her. “You will go into a stall, take the toilet paper, and completely wipe yourself clean,” I specify, “And then you’ll dump the load out of your panties into the toilet and scrub them thoroughly in the sink.” “And make sure that you do a good job cleaning those panties,” I tell the very upset freshman, “Because you’re going to be wearing them to school tomorrow.” Tia is, understandably, horrified at the prospect of having to clean up her accident in the girls’ room at school. She begs me to reconsider. “Please not that!” she pleads, “I won’t mess in my panties again, I promise.” “Maybe you won’t,” I answer optimistically, “After you have to clean up one of your accidents in school, I really hope you’ll finally learn your lesson and you won’t do it again.” “That is, after all, the whole point in punishing you,” I add. But even though I do feel sorry for her, I remain firm in her sentence. This is a punishment that she obviously needs.

It takes a moment for her to compose herself and she finally starts to realize that she is indeed going to have to clean herself up right here in school. She asks about privacy in this process. “Mrs. Johns will have to supervise the entire process,” I explain, “She’ll be right there in the stall with you to make sure that you clean yourself up completely.” “When you use the toilet properly, you get to go in the stall by yourself and have your privacy,” I point out, “When you go in your panties and have to go in there to clean yourself up as punishment, you don’t get that privilege.”

“Hopefully, you’ll learn your lesson this time,” I tell her. “Going in your panties in school and then cleaning it all up at home is no longer an option for you,” I explain, “When you go in your panties in school, you’ll be cleaning it up in school.” “I think you’ll find that it’s a lot easier to just go in the toilet when you need to,” I continue, “But obviously that choice is going to be yours.” Tia is still crying as the ever efficient Mrs. Johns leads her away to the girls’ room to perform the disgusting and humiliating task ahead. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen such a look of dread on a girl’s face as I see on Tia’s face now. It’s tempting to relent and give the poor girl a break, but I know that she truly deserves the punishment that I’ve assigned and it’s obviously the only way that she’s going to learn her lesson. Hopefully, as I said, this will be last time she’ll have to do this.

Our next case is that of Clarissa, a bright and eccentric junior who is charged with using her cellphone in the girls’ room. Specifically, she is charged with talking on her cellphone in a stall in the New Edition girls’ room when she should have been using the toilet instead. “Actually Mr. Chairman, that’s not entirely correct,” reports Miss Spellman, a Math teacher. “Clarissa was indeed using the toilet – she was going both ways,” Miss Spellman explains, “It’s just that she was talking on her cellphone while she was doing it.”

The use of cellphones in school has been a big issue this year, although more so with the Principal than the TVPC. Though they’ve always been banned in the classroom, a new school rule prohibits their use anywhere in school during school hours. The TVPC has long had a rule against their use in the girls’ room, but with the Principal cracking down on their use in school, some girls have tried to take advantage of the relative privacy of the girls’ room to use their cellphones. Consequently, we’ve seen a bit of an uptake in cases of girls using cellphones in the girls’ room – either during a necessary trip to the girls’ room or in making a girls’ room visit just to use the cellphone. With Miss Spellman’s correction of my earlier statement, it seems that Clarissa was talking on her cellphone while actually using the toilet. This is not a serious offense but obviously girls who are using the toilet need to be focused on their bathroom business and not distracted by a cell phone conversation. What if another girl was waiting to use the toilet and had an accident because the girl in the stall was talking longer than necessary due to talking on her cellphone? Obviously, this type of behavior needs to be stopped and it’s the TVPC’s job to stop it.

In spite of Miss Spellman’s accusation, however, Clarissa insists that she’s done nothing wrong. “I was just using the toilet,” Clarissa tells us, “I wasn’t using my cellphone at all in there.” “I was busy in there – I was going both ways,” she continues, “I didn’t have time to be using my cellphone even if I wanted to.” “And who would want to be talking on the phone while going to the bathroom anyway,” she adds, “The person on the other end could probably hear what you’re doing in there – that’s just gross.” “I don’t know why someone would use a cellphone on the toilet – I agree that it’s gross,” Miss Spellman points out, “But I’ve seen quite a few girls doing that since the Principal cracked down on cellphone use during the school day.” “I guess girls think they can get away with it in the bathroom,” the very lovely Math teacher speculates, “I guess they think that no one can hear them talking from outside their bathroom stall.” “And I definitely heard you talking in there, Clarissa,” she tells the chatty and eccentric junior, “You were talking the whole time you were in there.” “I’m sorry, Miss Spellman, but I just haven’t used my cellphone all day,” Clarissa answered back respectfully, “I didn’t even use it this morning at home.”

This case obviously presents dilemma for the TVPC. I wouldn’t say that Clarissa is a perfect angel when it comes to bathroom matters (she is certainly a familiar face to the TVPC), but she’s never been one to lie. She certainly seems sincere and I really want to believe that she wasn’t using her cellphone in the girls’ room. On the other hand, NAME is certainly not one to falsely accuse a girl of a toilet violation and Clarissa, for whatever reason, actually seems to be a favorite student of Miss Spellman. Obviously, I believe that Miss Spellman heard talking coming from Clarissa’s girls’ room stall but again I don’t think Clarissa would lie. As the TVPC starts to sort out what seems to be conflicting testimony, we hear a voice from the back of the room. “Mr. Chairman, sir,” chimes in Sara, from the detention section of the TVPC committee room, “I think I can explain what happened.” I, of course, call her to the podium and grant her permission to address the TVPC.

Back on Wednesday, Sara, a bright and busy senior, messed in her panties in Art class – a case of the teacher not giving her permission to go to the girls’ room when she asked. By time Art class was over that day, the poor girl already had quite a bit in her panties but she still needed to go some more. She headed to the girls’ room immediately after class to do the rest of it in the toilet, but not wanting to risk soiling the toilet seat by sitting her messy behind down, she decided to squat instead. But in her rush to use the toilet before the mess in her panties got any worse, she forgot to lift up the toilet seat before squatting. Faithful readers of the TVPC surely know that the rules require that girls who squat over the toilet to relieve themselves lift up the toilet seat first. All in all it wasn’t a good day for Sara as she ended up not only with the usual 3 days of detention (and a 300 times writing assignment) for her 3rd panty-soiling accident, but a week of study halls sitting on the toilet as punishment for squatting with the toilet seat down.

Fortunately for us, Sara is here in detention today to explain the discrepancy in the testimony of Clarissa and Miss Spellman. Sara explains that she was in the New Edition girls’ room doing her toilet sitting punishment during her 6th period study hall this afternoon. This is the same period that that Clarissa was in there using the toilet. “Clarissa wasn’t using her cellphone on the toilet,” she reports, “But it’s easy to see how Miss Spellman would think that she was.” “Look, I like Clarissa, she is really a nice person, but she is so weird sometimes,” Sara continues, “But she has this weird habit of talking to herself sometimes.” “But it’s not even like she’s talking to herself,” she explains, “It’s like she’s talking to some kind of imaginary audience out there.” “It’s weird enough when she’s talking to an imaginary audience in class or at lunch,” the bright and busy senior adds, “But it’s really kind of freaky that she’s talking to an audience while she’s on the toilet.” “I doubt that she was on a cellphone” Sara argues, “I’m sure that she was having a conversation with that imaginary audience of hers – describing her trip to the girls’ room for them.”

Strange as that explanation may seem, I actually believe it. Clarissa has been known to do this kind of stuff before. Miss Spellman is satisfied with that explanation as well and has no objection when I find Clarissa “Not Guilty” of the charge. “I don’t know who you think you’re talking to all the time,” I tell Clarissa, “But there’s no rule against talking to them – at least not in the girls’ room.” Thanking Sara for help, I offer to reduce her detention by one day. “Today was actually my last day,” she points out. “Um – if you want to reduce my writing assignment a little that would be good,” she offers, “I still have a ways to go on that – With all my duties as Assistant to the Mayor of Townsville it’s hard to find time to do the punishment lines.” “OK – I’ll reduce the writing to 200 times then,” I tell her. “That would be great, sir,” she says with a smile, “Thank you.”

[Arnold Ziffel]

Toilet Violations Punishment Committee

For the second time in less than a week, Lauren, a pretty blonde-haired senior and a member of the girls’ basketball team, is called before the TVPC. Actually, her status as a member of the basketball team is very much in doubt right now, but that’s not a matter for the TVPC. What is a matter for the TVPC is her wetting her pants – Not today but 4 days ago. Lauren seems most annoyed to be called before the TVPC again for what appears to be the same offense.

“Didn’t we deal with this on Tuesday,” she says, obviously annoyed. “OK – I wet my pants – It happens sometimes – Can’t we just move on,” she tells me, “Why are we dealing with this AGAIN?” I warn her to watch her attitude. “It’s just that some girls wet their pants all the time and they mess in them sometimes, too,” she explains in a calmer tone, “I wet my pants once in 4 years of high school and we’re making a big deal about this.” “It was my first offense and I got a warning like I’m supposed to get,” she argues, “Why am I now going to get punished for the same thing?”

Looking over the circumstances of Lauren’s wetting accident – Indeed the first accident of any kind in her high school career – We find that it happened at basketball practice on Monday. It seems that on that occasion, the Principal sprung random drug testing on all the members of the girls’ basketball team. The girls were lined up and then taken one at a time to the gym office bathroom to provide urine samples. As the girls were waiting in line to give their urine samples, Lauren apparently became quite desperate and couldn’t wait until it was her turn. She wet her pants quite badly right there in line. “I had an accident, wet my pants and got my warning,” the pretty blonde-haired senior repeats again, “I’m sorry but why are rehashing all this again.”

“Was it really an accident you had?” asks Miss Teiger, coach of the girls’ basketball team and the person who has re-filed this charge against Lauren, “You’ve never had an accident in high school before and you have the most cast-iron bladder that I’ve ever seen.” “You can go forever without using the toilet and I’ve never even seen you urgently needing to go,” the coach explains, “And then you suddenly get very desperate in line, can’t hold it in, and empty your whole bladder into your sweatpants?” “You didn’t even bother to mention how desperate you were or ask to go to the head of the line?” Coach Teiger continues, “Right from the beginning I thought that something just wasn’t right with this.” “I’ve got plenty of witnesses that saw me wetting my pants in line,” Lauren argues sarcastically, “I’m not proud of it, but as I said, it happens sometimes.”

“Obviously I know that you did wet your pants,” the coach tells her with a smile, “And it was quite a wetting at that – I saw the puddle on the gym floor myself.” “I think that with you, it only happens for one reason and I don’t think it’s actually losing control of your bladder,” the coach tells us, “I think that with you it happens when you don’t want to provide a urine sample for a drug test.” “We just got back your drug test results and you tested positive for marijuana” Coach Teiger continues, now in a more serious tone, “It seems that you had a very good reason for not wanting to give us a urine sample.” Lauren doesn’t appear surprised to hear the drug test results, but we all know that a failed drug test is a matter for the principal and not the TVPC. Now, both of us are puzzled as the why Coach Teiger has brought the pretty senior with deep blue eyes back to the TVPC for the same offense.

“You wet your pants on purpose, didn’t you?” the coach asks the senior, “You wet your pants hoping that you could then avoid giving a urine sample?” Lauren doesn’t answer the question but the expression on her face tells me all that I need to know. “Honestly, Lauren, did you really think we were so stupid that we weren’t still going to make you give a sample?” Coach Teiger asks her. As I understand it, they just cleaned up the girl’s puddle on the gym floor and then kept making her drink water until she could provide another urine sample. “It was really a stupid stunt if you ask me,” the coach adds, “I can’t believe you’d embarrass yourself like that.” I’m not quite sure if she’s more embarrassed to now have the truth known. It’s probably more embarrassing to her for people to think she genuinely had an accident than for them to know she did it on purpose trying to avoid a drug test. But what is clear is that this case is not what it first appeared to be and that is bad news for Lauren.

The Principal and Coach Teiger will, of course, deal with her failing the drug test. She will almost certainly be suspended from the basketball team for this. The TVPC, on the other hand, will deal with her wetting her pants. “The warning you got back on Tuesday for your first offense, applies only to ACCIDENTS,” I tell her, “Doing it ON PURPOSE, makes it a more serious offense and you don’t only get a warning for that.” “Your previous warning and your previous violation for having an accident is hereby rescinded,” I tell her and note for the record, “As you are now accused of wetting your pants INTENTIONALLY.” “How do you plead?” I ask her. “Guilty,” she answers reluctantly, “I did wet my pants intentionally.” “I smoked a joint the night before and I didn’t want them to test my urine,” she acknowledges. “I tried to make it look good by getting in line at the end,” she explains, “And then as the line moved slowly, I just let it go in my sweatpants.” “I don’t know why but I just never thought they’d make me give another sample after that,” she admits, shaking her head at her stupidity.

For intentionally wetting her pants I sentence her to serve 3 days in detention and to write 500 times, “I will not wet my pants in school again, especially to avoid a drug test.” “That’s for a FIRST offense?” she asks, “You know, this is still the first time I’ve gone in my pants since I’ve been in high school.” “Yes it is,” I tell her, “Obviously, it’s a more serious offense than just wetting your pants by accident.” But she also knows that that’s the least of her problems as she’ll next be taken to the Principal’s Office to deal with her failed drug test.

While Coach Teiger is here, she has another matter to address with the TVPC. As fans of the TVPC surely know, it was about 3 weeks ago when a terrible mess was found in the Science Wing girls’ room. It seems that some girl had an accident messing in her panties and then tried to flush her messy panties down the toilet. That left the toilet clogged and overflowed and mess all over the toilet seat apparently from when the girl sat down on the seat after messing in her panties.

At first, a girl named Blossom was charged with these offenses – that is, both panty-soiling and the very serious offense of trying to flush soiled panties down the toilet. At the 1/31/12 session of the TVPC, however, Blossom was found “Not Guilty” on both charges. Since then, TVPC investigators have been hard at work trying to find the guilty party in this case. So far it’s been a tough investigation. About the only thing we know about this perpetrator is that she was here at school that day long after the regular school day was over. Blossom had initially been charged with this because she was indeed at school at that late hour serving a 3 hour detention with her Science teacher Dr. Flower. And we also knew that Blossom used that very same Science wing girls’ room after that detention, having requested repeatedly during the detention for a girls’ room pass to no avail. But the pretty honor student insisted that she did eventually make it to the girls’ room in time to do her bowel movement in the toilet and thus had no messy panties to flush down the toilet.

Among those girls here late after school that day were the members of the girls’ basketball team practicing downstairs in the gymnasium. Naturally, they were questioned about the mess in the bathroom upstairs and as I understand it, they were all downstairs in the gym area that afternoon and had no knowledge of anything relating to the Science Wing girls’ room upstairs. And that, I can only assume, is what Coach Teiger wants to speak to the TVPC about this afternoon.

“I’m afraid that I have to report 2 of my girls for lying to your investigators,” Coach Teiger tells us. With her are Stephanie, a senior, and Leslie, a freshman, whom I assume are the girls she is referring to. The very pretty blonde-haired coach goes on to explain that when asked, all of her basketball players claimed that they never left the gym area during the whole practice session. “I always give them a 15 minute break right in the middle of practice,” she points out, “It’s so that take a breather and get something to drink and, of course, go to the bathroom if they need to.” “Stephanie told your investigators that she never left the gym area that whole time,” Coach Tieger explains, “But I know now that during that break she went upstairs to use the Science Wing girls’ room.” That revelation, of course, raises a lot of eyebrows on the TVPC. “I still don’t think she’s the girl who made that mess in there,” the coach quickly points out, “I think her only crime is lying about where she went to the bathroom that afternoon.” Stephanie, a well-built curly-haired redhead, eagerly nods her head at that notion.

But I have to wonder if Coach Teiger is only trying to protect one her players. With the stretch run of the basketball season upon us and the big state tournament games upcoming, the last thing she’d want is to have one of her players serving a toilet suspension for trying to flush messy panties down the toilet. “That seems like a foolish thing for Stephanie to lie about,” I tell the coach, “I mean she could have she just admitted that she used that girls’ room but didn’t even see the clogged toilet mess in there.” “If she really didn’t do it, I don’t understand why she would lie and get herself into trouble for no reason,” I explain further, “Just because she used that particular girls’ room wouldn’t make her guilty of anything.” “Well, that’s just it, Mr. Chairman,” Coach Teiger explains, “She did have a reason to lie.” The pretty but strict basketball coach goes on to explain that she recently put in a rule that the girls are not allowed to leave the gym area during basketball practice. “If they don’t want to use the toilets in the girls’ locker room, they can use the girls’ room in the hallway near the gym,” she tells us, “But they’re not allowed to leave the area and go find a girls’ room somewhere else.” “It’s not so much a problem with urinating,” Coach Teiger continues, “But lots of times if they need to have a bowel movement, they’ll try to find a different bathroom to do it in.” The coach also points out that in addition to the flushed panties being too big for Stephanie, the 15 minute break that the girls get would probably not be enough time. “It takes a lot of time for a girl to clean herself up after messing in her panties,” the coach explains, “Between getting upstairs to the science wing and getting back to practice in time, I doubt Stephanie would have had enough to clean up after an accident and try flush down her panties.”

“There really isn’t a lot of privacy in the girls’ locker room – the toilets face the lockers,” Stephanie, a senior, chimes in, “And the one in the hallway really isn’t much better – there are always so many girls in there, it’s not really a good place when you gotta do more than just pee.” “I just went upstairs to the Science Wing to find a better place to have my bowel movement,” she continues, “I just wanted to get away from the other girls so I could have some privacy to do it.” “And I really did have my bowel movement in the toilet there – I didn’t have an accident and I didn’t try to flush down those panties – I swear,” she says, “I only lied because I didn’t want to get in trouble with Coach Teiger for going up there in the first place.” “I really don’t know why she won’t just let us go find whatever bathroom we like to use,” the well-spoken senior adds, “We have plenty of time to get to the gym before the break was over.” “You should be thanking Coach Teiger for sticking up for you,” I tell her in uncertain terms, “If not for her, she could very well be facing charges for flushing those panties and be facing a toilet suspension for it.” “What do you think it would be like for you to be on toilet suspension during basketball season,” I point out, “Think about not being able to use the bathroom all day in school and then having to stay and go to basketball practice like that.” “And what about playing in games when you can’t use the bathroom beforehand,” I suggest, “Think about what that would be like.” “If not for Coach Teiger I’d have a hard time believing that you only lied about using the Science Wing girls’ room,” I tell her, “I’d have a hard time believing that you weren’t lying about what you did in there, as well.” “Yes sir,” Stephanie says. “Thank you, Coach Teiger,” she adds.

Stephanie is found “Guilty” of “Lying to the TVPC” because lying to a TVPC investigator is considered the same as lying to the TVPC itself. But fortunately for her, it’s the only thing she’s charged with – at least by us. I have a feeling, though, that Coach Teiger will have something in store for the pretty, well-endowed senior as well. But before pronouncing sentence, I ask Coach Teiger about the other girl. “Did Leslie also sneak out of the gym area to use a different girls’ room,” I ask her. “No, Mr. Chairman – hers is a little less severe,” the coach points out, “She lied to back up Stephanie’s story, but that’s it. “We were initially a little suspicious that Stephanie may have gone away from the gym area during the break,” Coach Tieger explains, “But Leslie lied for her and said the two of them were using adjoining stalls in the girls’ room in the hallway.” “Yes sir, I did lie – I’m really sorry about that,” Leslie admits, “I knew that Stephanie was going to the bathroom upstairs and I didn’t want to see her get into trouble for that.” “I was using the girls’ room in the hallway and I was in there a while having a bowel movement,” the cute and perky freshman continues, “So I just said that Stephanie was doing hers in the stall next to me.”

I certainly appreciate her being honest about that, but it does seem strange that she would lie for Stephanie like that. I know that they’re both on the basketball team together, but are a freshman and a senior really close enough friends that one would lie for the other. I ask her about that. “I don’t know if you remember it, but back in the fall, I really made a bad mess in my panties at a soccer game,” Leslie explains, “I felt really bad about it and the other girls on the team were teasing me about it.” “It was like the most embarrassing thing I ever did in my life – I was crying my eyes out,” she continues, “And Stephanie came up to me that day, gave me a big hug and told me that everything was going to be all right.” “She told me that accidents happen sometimes and I shouldn’t feel so bad about it,” the freshman goes on, “And she told the other girls on the team to stop teasing me about it – she was captain of the team, so they listened to her.” “If the other girls were teasing you that much you should have reported them either to your coach or directly to the TVPC,” I tell her, “We don’t allow girls to tease other girls about accidents.” “I mean, it wasn’t like they were being really nasty,” she points out, “It’s just that they making jokes and stuff.” “I think I kind of deserved it for what I did – It was just so stupid of me not to go in the port-o-potty,” she adds, “But it still made me feel really bad that they were making jokes like that.” “But Stephanie was just so nice about that whole thing,” she continues, “I don’t know how I would have it made it through that day and the bus ride home if not for her.” “She even gave me a ride home afterwards,” Leslie explains, “Or else I would have had to walk all the way home with a mess in my pants.”

“O.K. – But do you understand that it still wasn’t right for you to lie for her?” I ask the freshman cutie, “And can I assume that it won’t happen again?” “It definitely won’t happen again,” she assures me, “It was just hard for me to see her get into trouble after all she did for me.” I nod my head to acknowledge that I understand.

Moving on to their sentencing, I deal with Stephanie first. She gets 500 times “I will not lie to the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee again.” “F-F-F-Five hundred times?” she asks in disbelief, “I have to write that 500 times?” “Yes you do,” I clarify, although I think she already understood that. “I can’t believe I have to that 500 times,” she says, apparently shocked at the severity of her sentence, “All I did was use the toilet – I didn’t make the mess in there.” “What you did was lie to a TVPC investigator in the midst of a major investigation,” I remind her, “After lying about where you were, you can consider yourself lucky you didn’t get accused of flushing those panties and making that mess.” “You’d be facing a toilet suspension then and not just a writing assignment,” I point out, “I doubt a toilet suspension would be a pleasant prospect for you during basketball season.” “No it wouldn’t,” she acknowledges. “But neither is a writing assignment like that,” she explains, “That’s going to take a real long time to write and basketball practice already takes a lot of my time.” “I’m sorry I lied, and I know I deserve to be punished,” she tells me, “But please don’t make my punishment so bad.” “Coach Teiger is already punishing me for leaving the gym area,” she adds, “All I was trying to do was find a more private place to go to the bathroom.”

“What is your punishment from Coach Teiger?” I ask her. “Now I’m not allowed to leave the gym at all during practice,” Stephanie explains, “For the rest of the season, if I have to go to the bathroom, I can only use the toilets in the locker room.” “And when I have to do a bowel movement, I can only use the stall that doesn’t have a door on it,” the pretty senior redhead explains further, “Its bad enough going in the locker room bathroom as it is, but now I have to do my bowel movements in there with no privacy at all.” “I was allowing you to use the girls’ room in the hallway, but apparently that wasn’t good enough for you,” Coach Teiger points out, “So now we’ll see how you like it using that open stall.” “Yes Ma’am,” the contrite young lady acknowledges. “But please sir, can’t you cut me a break with my punishment from the TVPC,” she begs, “As you can see I’m already getting punished from Coach Teiger. She then requests that instead of having to write out “Toilet Violations Punishment Committee” in her 500 sentences, she be allowed to just write “TVPC”. “That’ll save me a little work,” she points out, “But it will certainly still teach me a lesson.” After careful consideration of everything, including her good toilet record, I decided to grant that request. “You can write the shorter version,” I tell her and note for the record, “But this better be the last time you EVER lie to this committee for one of its investigators.” “Yes sir,” she assures me, “Thank you, sir.”

Turning my attention now to the younger girl, I also give Leslie a stern warning about the importance of telling the truth to the TVPC. “I could very well give you the same punishment I gave Stephanie,” I tell her, “I think after 500 times, you’d be quite sorry you lied to the TVPC.” “I’m already sorry that I lied,” she tells us meekly. Well, that’s exactly what I wanted to here. “I guess your lie is slightly less egregious” I note, “At least you went to the bathroom where you were supposed to go – you didn’t sneak upstairs to the Science Wing girls’ room.” “You’ll write that sentence 300 times,” I tell her and note for the record, “And you can write the shorter version with the initials ‘TVPC’ as well.” “Do you have punishment from Coach Teiger as well?” I ask the freshman. “I can only go in the girls’ locker room as well but my punishment is only for a week,” she points out, “And I have the same thing about having to go #2 in the stall without a door.”

“I hope that’s not going to be a problem for you,” I tell the shy and athletic freshman cutie. “Well, I’m not going to like it – I’m really not going to like not having my privacy for that,” she says, “But I’m definitely not going to go in my pants if that’s what you mean.” “I’ll definitely go in the open stall if I need to,” she assures me, “That’s still a lot better than having an accident.” “Nothing’s worse than having a mess in your panties,” she adds, “I’m never going to do that again.” “I had to learn my lesson the hard way,” she points out, “But I definitely did learn my lesson.” “Obviously, I’ll be going in the open stall if I need to as well,” Stephanie points out, “I like my privacy, too, but I’m not going to be going in my panties, either.” “You wouldn’t use a stall with a stall WITH a door on it the gym hallway girls’ room,” I point out to her, “You came all the way upstairs to the science wing to avoid doing that.” “I’m not saying that I don’t like having my privacy – I really do like my privacy when it comes to doing that,” she acknowledges, “But it’s not like I’d just not go to the toilet and just go in my panties if I couldn’t get it.” “I was just trying to get as much privacy as I could and that’s why I came upstairs,” she continues, “But if I’m really desperate and I do have to use a bathroom with no privacy, that’s what I’m going to do.” “I’m certainly not going to be doing it in my panties,” she assures me, “That’s even worse than an open-stalled toilet – That’s just gross.”

Coach Teiger just smiles and shrugs her shoulders at that. The girls’ attitudes may very well be put to the test not only with their locker room punishments, but in the weeks ahead. The sectional finals for this years girls’ basketball state tournament, a sectional final that our girls are expected to reach, are scheduled at nearby Hickory HS. Hickory HS is an old school and is well known to us as having no doors on the bathrooms stalls. Our girls’ basketball team has had problems there in the past, toilet-wise, and both Coach Teiger and I have concerns. Hopefully, this year will better than last year, both on the basketball court and in the girls’ room.

[Arnold Ziffel]

Toilet Violations Punishment Committee

Our last case this afternoon concerns a tall, skinny, athletic senior named Nastia. The blonde-haired beauty is a member of our gymnastics team and is perhaps best known to TVPC readers for a pretty bad panty-soiling accident on the day of the athletic physicals last June. Since then, she has managed to keep her panties clean with no accidents of either variety. That is, however, until today as she stands before us with quite an obvious bulge in the back of her sweatpants.

“Obviously, you’ve cleaned up your toilet habits considerably since last year,” I tell her (that accident on the day of the athletic physicals last year being her 3rd last year), “I’m surprised to see you with such an accident today.” “It’s not my fault,” Nastia pleads, “I admit that I had the accident and it’s kind of a bad one, but it’s really not my fault.” She goes on to explain that she got the urge to go during her 6th period French class, but her teacher wouldn’t let her go to the girls’ room. I asked Mrs. Defequer for permission to go to the girls’ room, but she just wouldn’t let me,” Nastia explains, “Then I told her that I really had to go – I begged her to let me go – but she still wouldn’t let me.” “I really wanted to do it in the girls’ room – I’m really trying hard not to go in my pants anymore,” she continues, “I really don’t like how it feels when I have a mess in my panties and I’m really getting tired of getting punished for bathroom stuff all the time.” “I didn’t like to use the school bathrooms for #2,” Nastia explains further, “But now I realize that it’s better to go in school than to go in my pants.” “I’m a senior now,” she points out, “I’m getting too old to go in my pants.” “You know I’m doing better – you see that my toilet record is a lot better,” the pretty and athletic senior tells me, “And now Mrs. Defequer makes me go in my pants.”

“I didn’t make you go in your pants,” the French teacher fires back, “You did that all by yourself and you have no one to blame but yourself for that bulge in your pants.” “But you didn’t let me go to the girls’ room when I asked,” Nastia argues, “That’s why I had the accident.” “And you didn’t go to the bathroom at lunch when you had the chance,” Mrs. Defequer argues right back, “That’s why you had the accident.” Though teachers are under no obligation to excuse girls from class to use the girls’ room (and that’s why Nastia is obviously guilty of this panty-soiling), Mrs. Defequer is generally one of the more sympathetic teachers who usually will give a girls’ room pass when a girl asks for one. “I usually don’t mind so much giving a girl a bathroom pass when she really needs one,” the French teacher explains to us all, “But I also think a girl in high school has to take some responsibility for her bodily functions, too.” “Nastia has lunch period right before she has my class,” she points out, “There’s really no reason why she should be needing a girls’ room pass in my class.” “If she had just gone at lunch, then this wouldn’t have been a problem,” Miss Defequer points out, “And I understand that there was some issue with her at lunch today as well.”

“But I didn’t have to go at lunch!” Nastia argues emphatically. “I mean I did have to go at lunch but that was only to pee,” she explains, “I didn’t have to go #2 until later – I didn’t have to go #2 until French class.” Miss Defequer and I both look at Nastia puzzled – It seems strange that she would go from not having to go at all to having to go so bad she couldn’t hold it in, all within the same class period. “I think it’s the SUBWAY sandwiches that I eat,” the pretty senior gymnast explains, “They sometimes have that effect on me.” “SUBWAY sandwiches?” I ask her, because I know that we don’t serve such food in the school cafeteria. And apparently that also brings us to the “issue at lunch” that her French teacher referred to earlier.

Nastia goes on to explain that they’ve just opened up a SUBWAY restaurant just down the street from the school. “I kind of snuck off campus to go have lunch there today,” she admits, “And I kind of got caught by the principal sneaking back into school.” Girls are not allowed to leave campus for lunch but that’s a matter for the principal and not the TVPC. “At first, I got accused of sneaking off campus to go use the bathroom,” she points out, “I know that some girls like to go there for their really clean bathrooms.” “But I was honest and just told him that I went there for lunch,” she says, “I guess it’s pretty obvious now that I didn’t go #2 there.” Leaving campus to use a bathroom elsewhere would indeed be a matter for the TVPC, but just going there to eat lunch – as a non toilet-related matter – is a matter for the Principal. “I got a week of detention and for 2 weeks I have to sit by myself in the cafeteria and eat lunch facing the wall,” she says. “That’s pretty harsh,” I tell her, surprised at the severity of that punishment. “Unfortunately, it wasn’t my first time,” Nastia admits, “I really, really like those sandwiches.” “Their sandwiches are all so good – really, really good,” she adds, “All I can say is ‘YUM.’”

I quickly put up my hand to stop her. “You’re not doing a SUBWAY COMMERCIAL here,” I tell her, smiling a bit, “Let’s just stick to the facts of your panty-soiling. “Yes sir, but I’m just saying that I think it’s the sandwiches,” she continues, “They’re not only yummy but they really clean me out – I usually have to go to the bathroom a lot when I eat there and I mean #2.” “Apparently, that’s a bit of a problem for you,” I point out. “Well, not really, sir – I just make sure that I go to the girls’ room when I need to, “she tells me, “And going to the bathroom is really easy and comfortable because it makes my #2 really soft and easy to come out.” “But I guess it does make it harder to hold it in when I can’t get to the girls’ room right away,” she acknowledges, “But it really hasn’t been much of a problem until now.” “You have my toilet record there, sir,” she says, a tinge of pride in her voice, “You know that this is the first accident I’ve had since last year.” “Sometimes it does make it a problem to wipe, though,” she adds, “A lot of times when I go, it gets really messy back there.” Looking at her toilet record does bear that out. She has no accident offenses until now, but 2 violations for clogging the toilet with all the toilet paper she had to use.

All that is interesting but it’s not entirely relevant to her case. This is nothing more than a very simple panty-soiling case and Nastia is obviously guilty as charged. It’s her first accident offense of the school year, but having those 2 toilet clogging violations she is not entitled to get off with just a warning. I sentence her to 2 days detention and having to write 200 times, “I will not soil my panties in school again.” “Um – I already have that detention with the principal for what I said before,” she points out, “What am I supposed to do about that?” “You’ll have to serve that detention first,” I clarify, “You’ll serve your detention here when you’re done with that.”

Just as I’m about to gavel this session to a close, I note that Tia (our toilet troubled freshman) and Mrs. Johns (our ace bathroom monitor) have returned to the TVPC committee room. I see that Tia is still in tears and Mrs. Johns is about as angry as I’ve ever seen her before. Since I doubt that Tia could manage to clean both herself and her messy panties in the time since we finished her case, I wonder what these 2 are doing back here in the committee room.

“Tell Mr. Ziffel what you did!” Mrs. Johns tells Tia, “TELL HIM WHAT YOU DID!!” As I said, Mrs. Johns is angrier than I’ve ever seen her before. Tia is no longer sporting that large bulge in the back of her jeans, but she is crying so hard it’s difficult for her to form the words to tell me what happened. “She flushed her underwear down the toilet,” Mrs. Johns tells us, “She was dunking them in and out of the toilet and then she just let go when she flushed it.” “She said it was an accident,” our bathroom monitor continues, “She said she flushed the toilet to get clean water in the bowl and the panties just slipped out of her hand.” “But I think we all know better than that,” she states as she turns to face Tia, “She must think that I’m stupid or something!”

First, I take a moment to calm Mrs. Johns down. “Don’t worry,” I tell her, “I can assure you that the TVPC takes this very seriously and Tia will be punished quite severely for this.” “I don’t think Tia really thinks that you’re stupid,” I tell her, “I just think that she was awfully desperate.” “We’ll have to see next in a few minutes whether she’ll eventually decide to tell the truth,” I continue talking to Mrs. Johns, but obviously I’m speaking more to Tia, “We’ll have to see whether or not she’s going to make it even harder on herself by lying.” The scared and embarrassed freshman cutie is in enough trouble already and I want her to think about that before she makes it worse on herself by lying about what she just did.

Second, I need to confirm with our ace bathroom monitor the details of exactly what happened in the girls’ room. “We started with her cleaning herself,” she reports, “We went into a stall and I had her just start wiping herself.” “She was obviously very upset and this was a very bad mess that was smeared all over her backside,” she continues, “But I finally got her to focus on what she had to do and she eventually got it done.” “It took a whole roll of toilet paper and about a dozen toilet flushes to flush it all down,” Mrs. Johns points out, “But Tia got it done – She eventually got herself all cleaned up.” “Then it came time to clean out her soiled panties,” she continues, quite a bit calmer now, “The panties were a different story.” She goes on to tell us that Tia then carefully took off her panties and started working on them in the toilet first. “She first turned them inside out over the toilet and dumped out the worst of the load,” the bathroom monitor explains, “And then she started dunking them in and out of the toilet, trying to dislodge some other pieces of fecal matter from the panties.” “Obviously, she’s cleaned out messy panties before,” she adds, “I guess this is just the first time she’s had to do it in the girls’ room at school.” “She flushed the toilet next – I guess that was to get clean water in the bowl,” she continues, “It was then that she just let go of the panties and down the toilet they went.” “I don’t care what she says,” Mrs. Johns asserts, “Obviously, she just let them go on purpose because she didn’t want to clean them.”

They didn’t just slip out your hand, did they, Tia? I ask her. “No sir,” she answers through her tears. “You let your panties go on purpose, didn’t you, Tia?” “Yes sir,” she answers. “I’m sorry, sir,” she tells me as she breaks down sobbing. “It was bad enough having to clean myself in there,” she mumbles through her tears, “I just didn’t want to have to clean those panties, too.” It’s an odd explanation in that just about everyone who has to do a mess clean-up in school thinks cleaning themselves is the worst part of it. But that really isn’t important.

What is important is that Tia flushed her panties down the toilet – one of the most serious toilet offenses that we have. But she not only did that, she also violated her accident clean-up punishment by doing that. That’s an entirely separate violation and one for which I have to impose yet another punishment. “I’m very sorry, Tia,” I tell the poor freshman, “But you obviously have no one to blame but yourself for what I have to do next.”

I punish her first for actually flushing the soiled panties. “I’m afraid that’s another 1,000 times that you have to write now,” I explain – the sentence being, “I will not flush my soiled panties down the toilet in the girls’ room at school again,” “And that’s 3 weeks of detention cleaning school bathrooms.” “And you’re also going to have spend 2 months on toilet suspension,” I tell her, shaking my head, “For 2 entire months, you may not use any school bathroom for any reason.” As I give her some time to let that sink in, Mrs. Crabtree (a member of the TVPC) chimes in with a comment. “That hardly seems much of a punishment for Tia,” she says, “I don’t think she uses the school bathrooms that much anyway.” “I do go in the girls’ room to pee,” Tia quickly points out, “Does this mean that I can’t even go in the girls’ room to pee now?” “You can’t even go in the girls’ room to wash your hands or look at yourself in the mirror,” I point out, “So NO! you can’t go in the girls’ room to URINATE!, either.” Contrary to what Mrs. Crabtree may think, not being able to use the girls’ rooms at all and surely having to wet her pants in school (perhaps every day) is indeed going to be a harsh punishment for Tia.

But there is also the matter of Tia violating her accident clean-up punishment. “When the TVPC assigns you a punishment, we expect you to do it, young lady,” I tell her, “And there are very serious consequences when you don’t.” “Yes sir,” she responds quietly, still perhaps in a bit of shock at what is happening to her today. “I’m afraid that’s going to be a 3rd month of toilet suspension for you,” I explain and note for the record, “And a 2,500 word essay on the proper procedure for cleaning out soiled panties.”

“There’s also the matter of her toilet sitting punishments,” Mrs. Crabtree reminds me, “She’s got a week of detention and 2 weeks worth of study halls sitting on the toilet as punishment for messing in her panties.” Tia looks at us puzzled – wondering why we’d be bringing that up again. “You’re going on toilet suspension now,” I explain to the freshman, “Obviously you’re not going to be sitting on the toilet in school anytime soon – For the next 3 months, in fact.” “We’ll change all that to a month’s detention,” I pronounce, “She’ll serve that after she finishes her 3 weeks of toilet cleaning detention.” “A whole month?” Tia protests. “Yes, a whole month,” I answer right back, “And consider yourself lucky to get only that.” “You can at least serve your time in detention sitting comfortably in the back of the room,” I point out, “I could just as easily have sentenced you to spend it standing in the corner facing the wall.” She has nothing to say to that. Although, I’m not sure how comfortable she’ll be sitting here in detention after going the whole day in school without being able to use the girls’ room. All I can do is shake my head at this very, very sad situation. Hopefully, she’ll manage to get through her 3 months on toilet suspension without further incident, and get all her other punishments done as well.

So concludes another session of the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee. Meeting adjourned at 4:17 PM.

[spandexman]

Thanks

Always look forward to your reports Arnold. Thanks.

[Arnold Ziffel]

Toilet Violations Punishment Committee

Thanks, Spandexman, for your comments. It's always good to hear that my story is appreciated.

[Drying]

Only one comment... You deserve better.

It's always nice reading about the TVPC sessions, so thank you!