Toilet Violations Punishment Committee

[Arnold Ziffel]

Welcome to a session of the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee (TVPC) – this writer’s favorite fantasy. The story takes place in a high school not unlike other high schools. In this high school, however, there are strict rules regarding the toileting behavior of the school’s female students. Those who break the school toilet rules (including the rules against going to the bathroom in your pants) are brought before the TVPC to have their cases heard and their punishment given out if they are guilty. Meetings of the TVPC are called to order at 3:10 PM each school day in the TVPC meeting room – Room 222 of the high school. It should be noted that where this story takes place you need to be 18 in order to enter high school so all persons depicted, even though entirely fictional, are at least 18 years of age.

My name is Arnold Ziffel and I’m chairman of the TVPC. What follows are the summary minutes of the TVPC meeting of May 1, 2014.

As I take a quick glance at the TVPC agenda this afternoon, I am most disappointed to see that we have 2 matters that actually involve teachers. As faithful readers of the TVPC surely know, the TVPC normally doesn’t have the authority to punish teachers and other staff members. The TVPC’s authority is pretty much limited to the school’s female students. But these 2 faculty members are special cases. Before we get to that, though, we have some other matters to deal with.

We begin today’s session of the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee (TVPC) with news from last night’s “Academic Achievers” awards banquet. This was a program to honor the top students not only in our own high school but in high schools around the county. As a school event, the toileting behavior of our students at the banquet comes under TVPC jurisdiction. In fact because the students were representing the school at this banquet, any toilet violations that they commit (especially accidents) will carry additional punishment.

Patty, an outgoing blonde-haired junior, is charged with messing her panties at this banquet. Patty already has 3 previous panty soiling offenses this school year and is surely well into double figures when you add up the total for her high school career thus far. Accordingly, it’s hardly a surprise to see her charged with having done it again last night. She needs no excuse to go in her panties – It’s often been said that “a hot dog makes her lose control.” But what I don’t quite understand is what Patty was doing at the “Academic Achievers” awards banquet. She is certainly a friendly, outgoing sort of girl that just about everybody likes but academically speaking Patty would win an award as an “Under-Achiever” a lot sooner than she’d win one as an “Achiever”. I ask Miss Bliss, the faculty representative at the banquet and the one who has brought this charge against Patty, about this strange anomaly.

“Patty wasn’t exactly an honoree at the banquet,” Miss Bliss, a pretty History teacher clarifies, “She was at the banquet because her cousin Cathy was being honored.” “Cathy was the ‘Academic Achiever’ in the family and Patty was there with her family for the banquet,” Miss Bliss continues, “And unfortunately Patty couldn’t seem to last the whole evening without messing in her panties.” “Really Patty – You should be ashamed of yourself,” the History Teacher admonishes her, “You couldn’t even let Cathy enjoy her night without spoiling it with a mess in your panties.”

While Patty and Cathy could pass for twins – IDENTICAL COUSINS, you might say – they could not be more different in personality. Where Cathy is more refined and worldly, Patty is down to earth and social. Where Cathy is an academic achiever as we’ve noted, Patty is a lot less dedicated to her schoolwork and she has the grades to prove it. And whereas, Cathy would probably die rather than mess in her panties, Patty oftentimes finds herself too distracted by other things to get to the toilet in time. The results for Patty, of course, being messy panties on occasion.

“This is even more shameful than when she does it in school,” Miss Bliss argues. “Its one thing not to want to use the school bathrooms – I admit that they aren’t the greatest,” she continues, “But what possible reason could she have for not wanting to go in the ladies’ room at the banquet.” “The ladies’ room there was downright elegant – It’s about the nicest facilities I’ve ever seen,” the pretty blonde-haired History Teacher explains, “It’s really quite shameful and utterly disgusting that she’d rather just sit there and mess in her panties rather than go in a bathroom like that.”

I certainly can’t disagree with Miss Bliss. There are plenty of reasons why Patty should be punished for what she’s done and she certainly deserves a punishment that she won’t soon forget. I’d certainly want this to be a punishment that she remembers and thinks about the next time she needs to do a bowel movement at a school event like this. I’d want her to think that she’d do just about anything to avoid messing her panties and getting another punishment like she got this time. But I have bad news for Miss Bliss and probably bad news for TVPC fans out there. “Rarely do I get a girl who deserves to be punished for an accident as bad as you do,” I tell Patty, “It’s bad enough that you do it at school, but to do it a semi-formal event like this one and one where your cousin was being honored is just disgraceful.” “I really hope that you’re thoroughly ashamed of yourself for what you did last night,” I admonish the pretty, outgoing junior, “But unfortunately you were only there as a member of your family and not as an honoree yourself.” “If your cousin or one of the other honorees had committed a toilet violation, it would indeed be a TVPC matter,” I explain, “But for you, this was simply not a school event and consequently it is simply not within TVPC jurisdiction.” “I wish I could but I simply cannot punish you for this,” I tell her and announce for the record, “I have no choice but to dismiss this case and dismiss you without punishment.”

Patty manages a small smile at the news, but it’s a rather small and subdued smile. I’m sure she’s happy to be getting away without any punishment, but I think even she understands just how shameful and disgraceful this particular accident was. “I hope you apologized to your cousin and our other honorees,” I tell her. “I did apologize to Cathy,” Patty acknowledges sheepishly, “I guess I should apologize to the others as well.” “I think that would be a good idea,” I tell her. “You know, I did get punished by my parents for this,” Patty rather meekly explains, “I’m grounded for 2 weeks and when we got home, they made me clean out my messy panties.” “That’s the least you deserve,” Miss Bliss chimes in, “I don’t even consider cleaning out your panties to be a punishment – that’s just doing your laundry.” “You also should be writing 1,000 or at least 500 lines,” she adds, “And a couple of weeks of detention sitting on the toilet would do you some good, too.” “I’m sorry,” Patty tells her, as she chokes back tears, “I’m really sorry!”

I’m quite angry to call – Or should I say, RECALL – Heidi before the TVPC this afternoon. Heidi, a tall, blonde-haired senior is perhaps best know to faithful readers of the TVPC for her unusual affinity of offering girls money to do various toilet related things. In the past she’s offered girls money to do such things as soil their panties on purpose, not wipe herself after a bowel movement, and to use the boys’ room – Including going in the urinal – For both bodily functions. Depending upon whether the act she’s inducing a girl to do is against TVPC or not, Heidi’s act of offering money to do it, may or may not be against TVPC rules. I understand, though, that our rules committee is looking into changing some of those rules.

But the subject of Heidi’s TVPC visit this afternoon is a toilet violation of hers 3 days ago. It was then that Heidi was before the TVPC and pleaded “Guilty” to forgetting to flush the toilet – More specifically, with forgetting to flush after a particularly big bowel movement down the toilet. Heidi seems very annoyed to be called before the TVPC again for that same offense.

“Um – I was already punished for that, REMEMBER!” she tells me, an unmistakable tone of sarcasm in her voice, “You make me rush to use the toilet between classes and then you punish me because I forget to flush the toilet.” I give her a long, glaring look that makes it clear that her sarcasm is not appreciated. “I already got my punishment for that – 300 lines and 3 days detention,” she reminds me, this time in a more appropriate tone, “I handed in those 300 lines this morning and I’m supposed to be serving my last day of detention now.” “That was a lot just for forgetting to flush the toilet,” she adds, unhappily. “What’s the matter now?” she asks sarcastically, “Did I wipe myself with the wrong hand or something?”

Her comment draws a few giggles from the assemble crowd but I, of course, am not amused. “It doesn’t look like you wiped yourself at all,” I then tell her, “I mean, looking as this picture of your bowel movement, I don’t see any toilet paper in the bowl.” Heidi looks at me puzzled. “I mean, that is your bowel movement, isn’t it?” I ask her, as I hold up a picture, “This is your bowel movement in this picture that’s been circulating around the school, isn’t it?” Heidi’s puzzled look now turns to a worried one as she acknowledges that it is indeed her bowel movement in the picture “It seems that we here at the TVPC received this picture that someone apparently took with her cellphone,” I then explain to Heidi, “It’s a picture of a very large bowel movement sitting in one of our toilets – A bowel movement that looks very much like the one you did in the toilet last Monday.” “And the thing is the picture seems to have been taken with your very own cellphone,” I explain further, “And it also comes with a little caption bragging about the size of it.”

Heidi’s look now goes from worry to outright panic as she acknowledges taking the picture of her bowel movement and bragging about the size of it. “So, are you sticking to your story about just forgetting to flush?” I then ask her, my own sarcasm evident, “Are you still going to tell us that you were in such a rush going between classes that your just FORGOT to flush?” “I mean, it just seems a little strange that you’d remember to take a cellphone picture of your bowel movement, but then just forget to flush it down,” I taunt the pretty and outspoken senior, “And how fortuitous it was that you just happened to leave unflushed a bowel movement you wanted to brag about.”

Obviously, Heidi (who is also a member of our girls’ basketball team) knows she’s caught and she knows that leaving the toilet unflushed on purpose – Especially after a bowel movement – Is more serious than just doing it accidentally. Reluctantly, Heidi admits that she left the toilet unflushed on purpose so others could see the big bowel movement that she did. “I don’t know why I did it,” Heidi then tells us, “It’s just that some of the other girls on the basketball team are always talking about what big bowel movements they do sometimes and I wanted to show them that I could do one like that, too.” Some of her basketball teammates have, in fact, been punished by the TVPC for clogging the toilet with their huge bowel movements. Heidi’s bowel movement, while also quite large, was able to easily be flushed down the toilet.

Mrs. Karbopple, a member of the TVPC, asks Heidi about the lack of toilet paper in the bowel in the photo. “I mean, that really is a whopper you did there,” she asks, “I’d hate to think you didn’t wipe yourself after that.” “I did wipe myself – I wiped myself a lot after that,” Heidi answers, “I just went into another stall to do that.” “That’s so you wouldn’t spoil the sight of your big bowel movement in the bowl?” I ask. Heidi shamefully nods her head “yes.”

Moving on to Heidi’s punishment, I then direct the TVPC clerk to draw up a Violation Report for the more serious offense of “Intentionally Leaving the Toilet Unflushed” and that is, of course, after having a bowel movement. I then sentence the pretty senior to 5 days of detention and having to write “I must learn to flush the toilet after using the girls’ room in school” 500 times. “Well, I already wrote 300 times from before,” Heidi points out and she asks, “So that’s another 200 times that I have to write now?” I just shake my head and smile. “This is 500 times IN ADDITION to what you already wrote,” I tell her, “And the 5 days of detention is added to the other as well.” Heidi lets out an audible groan at hearing that and she argues that she should get credit for the punishment she already did. “I didn’t actually commit the offense of accidentally leaving it unflushed,” she points out, “So I should get a break on that and be able to count it against this punishment.” But, once again, I just shake my head and smile. “I’m not giving you a break on that at all,” I inform the senior, “If you’re going to lie and plead “Guilty” to an offense you didn’t commit, you’re going to have to do that punishment.” “And by that I mean, you have to do that punishment in addition to the punishment for the offense you actually did commit,” I explain further, “So maybe next you won’t lie and try to make your offense less than it really.” “Yes, sir,” Heidi says dejectedly. I know she doesn’t agree with all that, but she knows that arguing is pointless.

But just as Heidi is about to take a seat in the detention section, I stop her. “Just one minute, young lady,” I tell her, “We’re not done here yet.” “That was your punishment for leaving the toilet unflushed,” I then tell Heidi, “We’ll now get to your punishment for lying about it.” I then direct the TVPC clerk to draw up another Violation Report on Heidi – This one for “Lying to the TVPC.” Heidi looks at me puzzled. “Well, you did lie to the TVPC, didn’t you?” I ask her, “You said you left the toilet unflushed accidentally when you really did it on purpose, didn’t you?” Dejectedly, the poor girl can only nod her head “yes.” For this offense, I decide to give Heidi a very stern punishment. She’ll have to write “I will not lie to the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee again” – A grueling 1,000 times. Once again the poor girl groans at her punishment. She argues that it’s too severe – Especially in conjunction with the 500 times she’s already been assigned and the 300 times she’s already done. But her argument falls on deaf ears. “I’m sick of all this nonsense from you, Heidi,” I tell her, “Let’s stop trying to make a spectacle out of going to the bathroom.”

[Arnold Ziffel]

Toilet Violations Punishment Committee

“Miss Grace Musso,” I announce as I call the next case. Slowly, and with an intense look of embarrassment on her face, Miss Musso – A gym teacher and our Cheerleading Coach – Rises from her seat on “Defendants’ Row” and takes the podium. “Yes, sir, Mr. Chairman,” she tells me. Looking at her in her trademark tight red spandex sweatsuit, I cannot help but stare in amazement. She’s no youngster anymore, but she still looks sensational. Her toilet habits, however, are a far different story.

“Again, Grace?” I ask her, an obvious tinge of disappointment in my voice. “Please tell me that you didn’t really do this again,” I tell her, “I just can’t believe you’ve done another mess in your panties.” But looking over at our sexy Cheerleading Coach – Her head bowed in shame – Tells me all that I need to know. It is indeed another case of soiled panties for the toilet-troubled teacher. But, surprisingly, Miss Musso enters a plea of “Not Guilty” to the “Panty-Soiling” charge. “You can’t really call this an actual panty-soiling,” she tells me, “I mean, I guess my panties are kind of dirty a little bit, but you can’t really call it an accident.” “Really, Mr. Chairman, it’s only a little bit in my panties this time,” Miss Musso explains, “I did do most of it in the toilet.” “What I’m saying, Mr. Chairman, sir, is that you really can’t call this a ‘Panty-Soiling’ violation,” she explains further, “I mean, there is a little bit of it in my panties, but it really isn’t enough to punish me for having an accident.”

Obviously, Miss Musso shouldn’t have done anything at all in her panties – Obviously, she should have done ALL of her bowel movement in the toilet and not just MOST of it – But that isn’t necessarily a violation for “Panty-Soiling.” Faithful readers of the TVPC surely know that mere stains or skidmarks in a girl’s panties aren’t enough to constitute a “Panty-Soiling” violation. In order for it to be a punishable offense, we must be able to detect actual, tangible, fecal matter in a girl’s panties. Looking over at Grace in her spandex sweatsuit, it’s pretty clear that whatever is in her panties, it isn’t a big load – A big load would be readily obvious in that tight spandex – But it doesn’t need to be a big load to punish her for it, either. I, of course, remind our sexy cheerleading coach of that. “Just because it isn’t a big mess doesn’t mean it isn’t a panty-soiling, Grace,” I remind her, “Even a little bit in your panties is enough to get you punished.” “There’s really no excuse for you have to any of it in your panties, Grace,” I lecture her, “Obviously, your bowel movements belong in the toilet and by that I mean your ENTIRE bowel movement.”

“It may not be a big load, but it’s not just skidmarks, either, Mr. Chairman,” reports Dr. Flower, a very strict Science Teacher, “Without a doubt she’s got actual fecal matter in those panties.” “Disgraceful, Grace,” Dr. Flower opines, glaring at the sexy Cheerleading Coach, “That’s just disgusting that you’ve done what you did in your panties.” Dr. Flower is the teacher who caught Miss Musso with her soiled panties – However soiled they may be – And she is the one who has field the “Panty-Soiling” charge against her. For those that don’t remember, in order to be allowed to continue in her role as Cheerleading Coach, Miss Musso agreed to be subject to TVPC rules just as her cheerleaders and other girls in our school are. “I just don’t know how a grown woman can just go in her pants like that,” Dr. Flower continues in a derisive tone, “It’s bad enough when a girl in high school does it, but for a teacher to mess in her panties, it’s even worse.” “I just don’t know how you could let this happen,” she tells Grace, “I mean, how hard is it to just go to the lavatory and use the toilet when you need to?” “That’s just disgusting, Grace!” she tells her further, “It’s absolutely disgraceful for you to have a mess in your panties like that.”

“But I don’t have a mess in my panties,” Miss Musso speaks up in her defense, “I didn’t just go in my pants like she said.” “And I did go do it in the toilet,” she says emphatically, “Like I said before, I really did do most of it in the toilet like I’m supposed to do.” “You can’t say that this is a real panty-soiling – It just isn’t,” Miss Musso argues in frustration, “It’s only a little bit in my panties.” Her defense seems to anger Dr. Flower a bit. “I don’t care that it’s only a little bit – I don’t care that you did most of it in the toilet,” she tells the toilet-troubled Cheerleading Coach, “You’re supposed to do ALL OF IT in the toilet.” “You’re not supposed to do ANY of it in your panties,” she continues lecturing, “That’s just disgraceful for someone our age.”

Before this argument goes any further, I put up my hand to stop it. “Obviously, she shouldn’t have any mess in her panties at all,” I explain in agreement with Dr. Flower, “But if it’s only a little bit – Specifically, if it’s only skidmarks and streakmarks – It doesn’t constitute a panty-soiling accident.” “It may be disgusting and disgraceful no matter how small the mess is,” I continue, “But unless it’s actual, tangible fecal matter in the panties, it isn’t a “panty-soiling” according to TVPC rules.” “Oh, it’s a panty-soiling, alright,” Dr. Flower asserts vehemently, “Like I said before, it certainly isn’t a big load in her panties, but she’s definitely got real fecal matter in those panties.” “It isn’t only stains like she’s saying,” Dr. Flower continues, “She definitely did some of the bowel movement in her panties but she apparently got to the girls’ room and did the rest of it in the toilet.”

This case presents a dilemma for the TVPC. Is there really enough in Miss Musso’s panties to punish her for “Panty-Soiling” as Dr. Flower says or is it just some nasty stains as Miss Musso seems to suggest. Obviously, we’ll simply have to get another teacher to do a “Panty-Inspection” on Miss Musso and render her opinion. But before getting to that, I want to clarify something for the record. “This happened in the student girls’ room in the Science Wing?” I ask them both. They both nod their heads “yes.” That’s an important point because Miss Musso is only allowed to use the student girls’ rooms and not the faculty ones. But it does raise the question as to what she was doing in that particular student girls’ room. “After all, the Science Wing is nowhere near the gym where you teach,” I point out to Miss Musso, “One wonders why you went all the way to the Science Wing just to use the bathroom.” “Obviously, you could have more easily used the bathroom in the girls’ locker room or the girls’ room in the hallway by the gym,” I point out, “Or any number of girls’ rooms that are closer to the gym than the Science Wing.” Actually, I’m being a bit facetious here, because I’m not really wondering about that at all.

“You were holding it in for a while, weren’t you, Miss Musso?” I ask her, “You were holding it in because you didn’t want to have a bowel movement in the girls’ locker room or in the girls’ room in the gym hallway?” Reluctantly, and shamefully, Miss Muss acknowledges that this is true. “And this accident would never have happened at all if you had used either of those girls’ rooms when you had the chance?” I ask, “It only happened because you were holding it in until you could get to a different girls’ room and you just held it in too long?” Once again, she acknowledges that that’s true. “It was just a little bit that come out in my panties before I could get to the girls’ room up there,” Miss Musso states, embarrassed, “Like I said before, at least I did most of it in the toilet.”

That just leaves me shaking my head. The sexy cheerleading coach starts to argue that the girls’ rooms upstairs (like the one in the Science Wing) are so much nicer than the girls’ locker room toilets or any of the girls’ rooms near the gym. But I put up my hand to stop her. “I don’t want to hear it!” I angrily tell her, “We have toilets in the girls’ locker room for a reason and that reason is so girls in the gym can go to the bathroom there.” “I’m really getting tired of your excuses, Grace!” I tell her, again in an angry tone, “I don’t tolerate these kinds of excuses for our students and I’m certainly not going to tolerate them from a teacher and coach.” “When are you going to learn not to hold it in when you really have to go?” I lecture her, “When are you going to learn to just go use the toilet when you need to?” With those questions, Miss Musso just breaks down crying.

“Do you still want to contest the charge of ‘Panty-Soiling’?” I then ask her, “Do you still want to argue that you’ve only got stains in your panties and no actual fecal matter?” Still in tears, Miss Musso then changes her plea. “I’m guilty, sir,” she tells me, “It’s not a lot but I guess there’s some fecal matter in my panties.” “Well, I don’t know what to say, Grace,” I tell her, as much disappointed as angry, “I think we both know that there’s simply no excuse for you to keep having accidents like this.”

Now accepting her plea of “Guilty” we can move on to her punishment. Though it’s only Miss Musso’s 2nd panty-soiling violation of this school (and that’s actually pretty good for her), I’m still pretty annoyed that a teacher would do this. I suppose I should consider that it’s only a little bit in her panties, but like was said several teams, there’s really no excuse for her to do ANY of it in her panties. And the lovely Miss Musso also has 2 other toilet offenses on her record this school – One for unnecessarily holding in a bowel movement at a game (given her past history she’s required to use the bathroom immediately when she needs to) and one for using a faculty bathroom rather than the students ones. Accordingly, I sentence her to write 500 times “I will not soil my panties in school again” and to serve a week of detention sitting on the toilet. “And that will, of course, be toilet sitting in the girls’ locker room bathroom,” I further stipulate to Miss Musso, “And you will, of course, sit your time in the stall that doesn’t have a door on it.” The sexy cheerleading coach lets out an audible groan at hearing that, but she knows better than trying to argue.

Dealing next with our other faculty matter, I call Miss Spellman to the podium. Miss Spellman is a young, blonde-haired beauty who teaches Math and coaches the girls’ soccer team. Her toilet troubles don’t come close to matching those of Miss Musso – In fact, she’s known to be quite diligent in taking care of her bathroom business promptly and properly – But Miss Spellman did have one recent and quite embarrassing lapse in her toilet habits.
Faithful readers of the TVPC should recall the TVPC session of April 14th when the lovely Miss Spellman admitted to not only soiling her panties but making quite a mess in the librarian’s office bathroom while cleaning herself up. Krista, a pretty and energetic junior brunette, was initially accused of making the mess in that faculty bathroom, but Miss Spellman rather bravely came forward and admitted that it was her. She confessed that she had been holding it in for a while awaiting her opportunity to use that private bathroom in the librarian’s office. Unfortunately, Miss Spellman encountered a line for that very popular faculty bathroom and ended up messing her panties while awaiting her turn. She then used that bathroom to clean herself up and having only toilet paper to use, she ended up leaving a mountain of used toilet paper clogged in the toilet. Ultimately, the pretty teacher and soccer coach agreed to accept punishment from the TVPC for toilet-related misdeeds that day. That came after some nasty comments from Hope – The toilet-troubled star goalie of the soccer team – That the coach should accept the same punishment she’d seek to impose on one of her players for those same toilet violations. Incidentally, Hope just recently finished serving a 2 week toilet suspension (as well as some other punishments) for some of those nasty comments.

As for Miss Spellman, she didn’t get it too bad for the panty-soiling itself (after all, it was her first one), but I did have to get tough on her for clogging the toilet with all that toilet paper. In addition to a heft writing assignment (“I will not clog the toilet in the girls’ room or faculty bathroom in school again” 500 times) and, of course, bathroom cleaning duty after school, the TVPC imposed a 2 week sentence whereby Miss Spellman was only allowed to use student girls’ rooms. And it was that 2 week exclusion from the faculty bathrooms that brings Miss Spellman back before the TVPC today. It was 1 week ago today that Miss Spellman was caught using that very same faculty bathroom in the librarian’s office. Fortunately for her, she managed to do her bowel movement in the toilet this time and she didn’t clog it, but that’s still a violation of her punishment for the previous offense. Today – 1 week after it was assigned – Miss Spellman is being asked to hand in the 1,000 times writing assignment (“I will not violate my punishment from the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee again”) that she got for violating her punishment.

“As I’m sure you know, it’s due today, Sabrina,” I tell her. “I’m rather surprised you haven’t handed it in before now,” I tell the blonde-haired beauty, “For your sake, I certainly hope you’ve managed to complete it by now.” “Yes, sir – I have it all,” Miss Spellman then tells me, holding up a folder that I assume contains the completed writing assignment. “It took me a while to write that – A lot longer than I expected,” she tells me, “A thousand times is really a lot of sentences to write.” “Indeed it is!” I tell her, “It’s a serious punishment that should make you think twice about committing that toilet violation again.”

“Yeah, I guess so,” Miss Spellman then tells me, a noticeable tinge of sarcasm in her voice. I’m not happy about that and I ask her for an explanation. “Don’t you think 1,000 times was a bit much for what I did?” she then asks me, “I mean, I know you had to punish me for violating my punishment, but don’t you think 1,000 times was overkill?” “You know, all I really did was use the toilet,” Miss Spellman explains, “I mean, I did my business in the toilet and then I flushed it away like I was supposed to.” “Did you REALLY have to give me 1,000 times just for that?” she asks sarcastically, “Don’t you think that even 500 times would have been plenty for something like that?” “I mean, I only got 500 times for clogging the toilet in the first place,” she explains further, “And now I use the toilet the right way and I get 1,000 times for that.”

I must say I’m a bit taken aback by her comments and in particular, her tone. Miss Spellman is a decidedly good-natured young teacher and perennially in good cheer. But I suppose the chore of having to write a sentence 1,000 times is enough to put anyone in a bad mood. And that’s to say nothing of the writing she had to do for her original violation as well as the bathroom cleaning detention and the unpleasantries of using the student facilities instead of the faculty ones. “No, I don’t think 1,000 times was unduly harsh,” I explain to Miss Spellman,” You’re lucky you didn’t get put on toilet suspension for using a faculty bathroom like you did.” “When you clogged the toilet, you didn’t do that on purpose,” I remind her, “You had an accident and while desperately trying to clean yourself up, you got careless with the toilet paper.” “Yes, you really made a mess in there,” I explain, “But I certainly can sympathy with you being in a difficult situation.” “But this time what you did was purely intentional,” I explain, “You knew you weren’t suppose to use any faculty bathrooms but you did it anyway.” “That’s why it was 1,000 times,” I point out, “And that’s why it was now another month of using only the student girls’ rooms.”

“When the TVPC imposes a punishment, Sabrina, I expect you to abide by it,” I tell her sternly, “When the TVPC says that you are banned from using faculty bathrooms then you BETTER NOT be caught using a faculty bathroom!” “Is that understood, Miss Spellman?” I ask her. “Yes sir,” she assures me, decidedly more contrite than before. “You’re very lucky it was 1,000 times instead of 500 times,” I point out, “Because if it was only 500 times, it would have come with a toilet suspension attached to it.” “That’s why I made it 1,000 times,” I explain, “I gave you a heftier writing assignment because I spared you a toilet suspension instead.” “Now, Sabrina, would you rather have a toilet suspension than 1,000 times?” I ask her. “Now sir,” she tells me, again in a decidedly more contrite tone, “I’d certainly rather do the writing than get put on toilet suspension.”

In addition to the 1,000 times writing assignment and another month of using only the student girls’ rooms, Miss Spellman is being required to keep a journal of her toilet visits during this month. Said journal is to be turned in to the TVPC when her month of punishment is completed. While she’s here, I ask her how that journal is coming along. “Well, I’m keeping track of all my bathroom trips in school like I’m supposed to,” she tells me, “I’ll have that report to hand in at the end of the month.” “What about today?” I then ask her. “Well, I went to urinate in the Main Corridor girls’ room right before Homeroom,” Miss Spellman tells us, “And then right after 5th period, I went both ways in the 2nd Floor girls’ room.” “What about yesterday?” I also ask her. “Well, yesterday I only had to pee – err, I mean urinate,” she says, “I went before homeroom, I went again after 5th period, and then I went again, before I went home.” “And?” I ask her further, since that answer was incomplete. “Oh – The first 2 times it was in the Main Corridor girls’ room,” she answers, “And the last time it was in the girls’ room down by the cafeteria as I was leaving.”

“O.K. – Just make sure you keep that journal up to date,” I remind her. “And make sure you stay out of faculty bathrooms until your month is complete,” I warn her, “Next time, you will indeed be placed on toilet suspension.” Miss Spellman assures us that she’s learned her lesson this time and promises that she’ll never do it again.

I cannot help but do a double take as I read the Violation Report in our next case. It’s certainly no surprise to see Ivy, a pretty, full-figured senior brunette, before the TVPC as she’s often been here before. But I am quite surprised – Shocked, in fact – At the reason. The vivacious, outgoing Ivy is certainly not shy about using the toilet in school no matter what she needs to do. In fact, she and her best friend Teddy have each clogged more than a few girls’ room toilets with their big, healthy bowel movements. But today, shockingly, Ivy’s got the bowel movement in her pants. Teddy, a pretty blonde and fellow senior, is apparently here for moral support.

“This is so gross!” Ivy says as she gingerly steps up to the podium, “I can’t believe that I went in my pants!” “Don’t worry about it, Ivy – It happens,” Teddy tells her sympathetically, “It happened to me that one time at the academic competition.” “Well, it doesn’t happen to me,” Ivy tells her friend, “At least it hasn’t happened to me since I can’t remember.” “I can’t believe I went in my pants!” Ivy says again, an exaggerated look of disgust on her face, “This is just so gross!” “How can a girl stand it having a mess in her pants like this?” she asks, “Why wouldn’t a girl do anything she could to avoid this?” I look at her puzzled, not really sure what she means. “I mean, some girls go in their pants all the time,” she explains. “I just don’t know how they can stand that,” Ivy continues, “Why don’t they just go in the girls’ room when they have the chance instead of risking having an accident like this?”

“I guess a lot of girls just don’t like doing that particular function in the girls’ rooms at school,” explains Mrs. Karbopple, a member of the TVPC, “I think that most girls don’t mind so much peeing at school, but they really don’t like doing their bowel movements here.” “I think a lot of girls don’t think the bathrooms here at the cleanest,” chimes in Mrs. Crabtree, another TVPC member, “And I think they prefer the privacy of their own bathrooms at home when they have to do more than just urinate.” “Well, yeah – The girls’ rooms are disgusting,” Ivy says, once again very animated. “But no way is it more disgusting than going in your pants,” she says, “I mean, nothing is more disgusting than this!”

[Arnold Ziffel]

Toilet Violations Punishment Committee

Getting back to the matter at hand – Specifically, Ivy and the load in her panties – I ask her how it happened. “I agree with you, Ivy,” I tell the full-figured beauty, “I certainly think it’s better to go at school – Even if you don’t particularly like our bathrooms – Than it is to mess in your panties.” “But I can’t help but notice, Ivy,” I continue, “That you have indeed gone in your panties today.”

“Yes, sir,” Ivy says dejectedly, “I just don’t know what came over me today.” “Usually when I have to go, I just go,” she says, “I don’t care whether it’s just pee or it’s both ways – I just go to the girls’ room when I have to and do what I gotta do.” “I usually just go at lunch or sometimes I’ll go during study hall,” the pretty brunette explains, “And if I need to, I’ll just get a pass from class and go then.” “But I just don’t know what was wrong with me today,” Ivy continues, “I just kept trying to hold it in instead of going to the girls’ room when I needed to.” The outspoken and never shy senior goes on to tell us that she and her best friend Teddy usually go together during lunch period, but Teddy didn’t have to go today. “I went before lunch today,” the pretty, blonde-haired Teddy then explains, “I had a bit of an emergency in French class and I got a pass from Miss Defequer and went then.” Teddy explains that by going then – The period before lunch and going both ways – She just didn’t have to go at lunch. “Man, did I have some kind of bowel movement then,” Teddy explains further, with a smile, “It’s a small miracle that I was able to flush that thing.” Ivy flashes a small smile at her friend’s vivid description. “I guess that’s what I needed to do, too,” Ivy tells her, “I wish I had been there doing it with you.” Ivy further explains that after not going at lunch when she first needed to, she just kept putting it off and off until finally it was too late. “By the time I got to Science class, it felt like it was ready to explode,” the pretty, full-figured senior tells us, “I quickly got a girls’ room pass from Miss Robinson, but by then it was too late.” According to Miss Robinson, Ivy then froze at the classroom door, and standing there, she started going in her pants. “I guess my bowels just kind of did explode,” Ivy says, “It just kind of exploded out of me and started loading my panties.”

“I’m sorry, Ivy,” Teddy tells her, forever a good friend. “I should have gone with you to the girls’ room at lunch anyway,” she says, “That’s what we usually do and if you had to go, I should have gone with you.” “It’s not your fault, Teddy,” Ivy tells her, “I’m the one who had to go to the bathroom and I’m the one who didn’t go.” “I just can’t believe I was so stupid,” Ivy says again. “I can’t believe I just didn’t go to the girls’ room when I should have,” she laments, “I can’t believe I was stupid to mess in my panties like this.” “No sense beating yourself up over it,” Teddy tells her, “Like I said, it happens sometimes and you just have to make the best of it.” “Like I said, it happened to me, too,” Teddy reminds her friend, “Yes, it’s gross and disgusting but you just clean it up and you get over it.” Ivy just shrugs her shoulders and gives Teddy a sort of “I guess so” look. “I just can’t wait to get home and get this all cleaned up,” Ivy says. Teddy, in turn, gives her best friend a nod a “Don’t worry – I’ll help you” kind of look.

Getting to the matter of Ivy’s punishment, I note that it’s her first accident offense of the school year. It’s the first accident offense of her high school career, in fact. But given her somewhat lengthy list of other toilet violations this school year – Twice clogging the toilet with large bowel movements, twice loitering in the girls’ room and once leaving class without permission to go – She’s not entitled to get off with just a lecture and warning or even the standard punishment for a 1st accident offense. Instead, she’ll have to write, “I will not soil my panties in school again” 250 times and serve 2 days in detention. For Ivy, though, the shame and disgust she’s feeling now is far worse than any punishment I could give her.

Next up before the TVPC is Lauren, a shy sophomore with light brown hair. She stands accused of cutting class for bathroom-related purposes. Specifically, she is accused of cutting her 8th period English class to go home to use the bathroom. Her mother apparently came home from work unexpectedly and caught Lauren coming out of the bathroom after having done a bowel movement in there. Lauren, of course, should still have been at school at the time. Her mother is here with us today, having phoned our office to report Lauren’s violation and now she brought Lauren back to school to face the TVPC.

“Good afternoon, Mrs. Miller,” I greet the sexy, well-built brunette, “I thank you for your vigilance in bringing this matter to our attention.” “Good afternoon, Mr. Ziffel – Thank you for getting this matter on the agenda so quickly,” she tells me, “The sooner Lauren reaps the consequences for this the better.” “And please call me Judy,” she says with a smile, “It’s not like we’re strangers.” It seems that between toilet issues with Lauren and several TVPC visits from her own high school days, Judy is quite a familiar face to the TVPC. Lauren is a bit shy about using the girls’ rooms at school and suffered through a freshman year with 6 panty-soiling accidents – 2 of which were doubleheaders. She has 3 panty-soilings already this year in addition to one violation of Using the Nurse’s Office Bathroom and now apparently Cutting Class to go Home to Use the Bathroom. Judy, on the other hand, never had a problem with using the girls’ rooms in her own high school days. In fact, she not only used the girls’ rooms for their intended use, but for smoking as well.

“I guess Lauren must have forgotten that I only work a half day on Thursdays,” Mrs. Miller tells us, “I get home today and I hear a toilet flushing upstairs.” “I was startled at first because no one was supposed to be at home,” she continues, “I knew it couldn’t be Lauren because Lauren was still supposed to be at school!” The last bit of that, of course, was delivered with sarcasm and directly at Lauren.

“I’m sorry, Mom,” Lauren tells her, “But I really had to go to the bathroom bad and I knew I couldn’t hold it in.” “I had been holding it in since lunchtime,” Lauren continues, “And I knew I wasn’t going to make it much longer without having an accident.” “I knew I wasn’t going to make it through Geometry and get home in time,” she says, “I’m sorry I cut English but if I didn’t get home when I did, I was definitely going to have an accident.” “I just didn’t want to have another accident,” Lauren says, a note of desperation in her voice, “I didn’t know what else I was supposed to do.”

Her mother, of course, isn’t about to let that slide. “What you’re supposed to do is use the girls’ room here at school,” Judy tells her angrily, “What you’re supposed to do is take care of your business at school like a girl your age should.” “For Pete’s sake, Lauren – You’re a sophomore in high school now,” she tells her daughter, “Don’t you think it’s about time you got over this thing you have with pooping in public toilets.” “But I just can’t – They’re gross!” Lauren pleads, “Why can’t I just go at home instead.” “Because you’re not always at home when you need to go, Lauren,” her mother tells her, “And you can’t always wait until you get home to do it, either.” “There’s got to be like 100 toilets for girls at this school,” Judy points, “There’s no reason you can’t find at least one that you can use.” “There’s absolutely no reason you have to be sneaking home just to poop,” she adds, “There’s no excuse for cutting class to do that.”

But Lauren just shakes her head and insists she can’t “go poops” in the toilets here because “they’re gross.” “I’ll just die if I have to go poops at school,” she says, “I’ll just die.” “Oh for Pete’s sake, Lauren,” her mom tells her, “Will you cut out the melodramatics already.” “A toilet is a toilet,” she tells her daughter. “Are you forgetting that I was a student here, too,” Mrs. Miller tells Lauren, “I must have done my business in those toilets a hundred times and I’m STILL STANDING!” Unfortunately, Lauren appears unimpressive by her mother’s story.”

Accepting Lauren’s plea of “Guilty,” I’m now ready to impose her punishment. “I know you’ve been here before for messing in your panties, Lauren,” I tell her, “But this is quite a different matter.” “Sneaking home to do a bowel movement in the toilet there may be less messy than going in your pants,” I point out, “But cutting class and leaving school grounds when you’re not supposed to, actually constitutes a more serious offense.” “This time your punishment is going to be 500 times,” I tell her, “It’s going to be ‘I will not cut class to go home and use the bathroom again’ 500 times.” “And you’re also going to have to write Mrs. Buchman a 1,000 word letter of apology,” I also stipulate, “That’s your punishment specifically for cutting her class.” “And I’m afraid you’re also going to have to serve a week in detention for this,” I further stipulate. “That’s really a shame, Lauren,” I point out, “You just got done serving your last detention sentence yesterday and now you’ve got another detention sentence – An even longer detention sentence – To serve.” “And you still owe us the 300 lines for that panty-soiling,” I remind her, “Those are due the day tomorrow.”

[Arnold Ziffel]

Toilet Violations Punishment Committee

But just as I’m about to call the next case, I can’t help but notice the puzzle look on Judy’s face. “What was that, Mr. Chairman?” she asks me. This time it’s my turn to look puzzled. And then she, in turn, looks back at me puzzled. “Well, Lauren had a panty-soiling violation last week,” I explain to Mrs. Miller, “It happened on Friday – She soiled her panties in Biology class, I think it was.” “She finished serving her detention for it yesterday,” I tell a very surprised Mrs. Miller, “But like I noted before, she still owes us the 300 times writing assignment.” Judy stills looks puzzled, only this time she glaring at Lauren in the process. Checking Lauren’s toilet record file, I pull from the file, the Violation Report for that offense. “Yes, it was in Biology class 7th period on Friday that it happened,” I confirm. “It has your signature here,” I tell Judy, as I hand her the said Violation Report.

Immediately, I see Mrs. Miller’s reaction turn from puzzlement to outrage and I see Lauren’s reaction turn to something closer to panic. “You forged my signature on this?” Judy screams at her daughter, “You forged my signature on your Violation Report?” “It’s not bad enough that you messed in your panties AGAIN,” she continues in a very angry tone, “But you forged my signature, too?” The harsh words and angry tone bring Lauren to tears. “I just didn’t’ want you to find out I messed in my panties again,” she tells her mom, though her tears, “I know how mad you get when I do that.” “Of course, I get mad when you do that!” Mrs. Miller screams at her, “It’s totally disgusting and shameful when you do that!” “I still can’t believe you’re still messing in your panties at your age,” she lectures her daughter, “You’re a sophomore in high school for Pete’s sake and you still can’t manage to get to the toilet when you need to.” “It was bad enough when you had all those accidents as a freshman,” Judy continues, “But I cut you a break on those because I figured you’d eventually outgrow it.” “But here you are still doing it,” Judy goes on, “That’s just disgusting, Lauren, that’s just disgusting!”

In response to her mother’s questions, Lauren explains that she cleaned up her messy panties when she got home from school that day and her mom was none the wiser. “And then you forged your mother’s name on the Violation Report and handed it in that way?” I ask her. Lauren acknowledges that she did. “I just didn’t want mom to find out that I did it,” she explains again, “I just didn’t want to get yelled at and punished again.”

“Oh you’re going to get punished alright,” Judy tells her, “You’re going to get punished like you’ve never been punished before.” “Now, you’re not only getting it for soiling your panties but for forging my signature, too,” she tells Lauren. “And I’m afraid, Lauren, that the same is true with the TVPC here,” I tell the shy sophomore beauty, “You already got your punishment for soiling your panties and now you’re going to get it even worse for forging your mother’s name on a toilet violation notice.” Lauren lets out an audible groan at hearing that. She’s beginning to realize that she’s only bought herself even more trouble now. “That’s going to be another week in detention, Lauren,” I tell her and note for the record, “And I’m afraid it’s 500 lines for this one, too.” The sentence she’ll have to write is a pretty long one, too – “I am very sorry for forging my mother’s name on a Violation Report and promise never to do it again.” Lauren groans again. “500 times?” she asks. “Yes, 500 times, Lauren,” I tell her, “Forging a parent’s signature on a TVPC notice is a serious offense.” “And it’s a serious matter with me, too,” her mother tells her. “We’ll discuss how long you’re grounded when we get home,” she tells Lauren, “But suffice to say, I wouldn’t be making any plans for a while.”

For our next case, I call a tall and gorgeous blonde-haired senior named Bridgett. And I must say that I’m more than a little surprised when I read the Violation Report in this case. “Masturbating in the Girls’ Room?” I ask the blonde-haired beauty, unable to contain my surprise. “Yes sir,” she tells me, staring at the floor in obvious shame at what she’s done. The announcement of the charges brings more than a few snickers and giggles form the assembled crowd. Most prominent amongst the amused onlookers is Bridgett’s younger sister Kerri – A quiet, studious sophomore serving detention for panty-soiling. Quite frankly, it seems like Kerri is enjoying her sister’s embarrassment way too much. It’s certainly not a common occurrence, but occasionally we do get girls masturbating in the girls’ room. But what really surprised me is that I’d never expect to hear of Bridgett doing it. Although she was recently punished by the TVPC for doing a bowel movement while squatting over the toilet with the toilet seat still down, her toilet habits are usually very good. Kerri on the other hand, as evidenced by her presence in detention today, has a long history of TVPC appearances for soiling in her panties.

“It was 4th period and I was heading in to use the New Addition girls’ room,” reports Miss Callahan, an Art Teacher and Bridgett’s accuser, “I only had to pee so I just ducked in there rather than going all the way to the faculty bathroom.” “Immediately, I heard these strange noises coming from the last stall by the window,” she continues, “So I went over to see what was going on.” “All I can say is Bridgett was really going at it,” Miss Callahan explains, shaking her head, “She was really doing herself pretty rigorously in there and it looked like she was really having a good time of it.”

Once again, that draws a reaction from the assembled crowd and once again, her sister Kerri is most prominent amongst them. This time, though, the usually quiet honor student starts making masturbation noises at her sister’s expense. Bridgett, of course, takes exception to that. “At least I use the girls’ room,” she taunts Kerri angrily, “At least I’m toilet trained.” “At least, I don’t mess in my panties like a baby,” she mocks her sister. Instinctively, I reach for my gavel, but there’s no need – Bridgett definitely put Kerri in her place this time.

“Can we now get back to the matter at hand?” I ask them, instantly regretting my unintended pun – A pun which causes some snickering anew. “Yes sir,” Bridgett answers, although I’m sure she’d much rather talk about her sister’s panty-soiling proclivities than her own activities in the girls’ room today. “I plead ‘Guilty’, sir – I’m really sorry that I did it,” she tells me, obviously quite contrite, “I never intended to do it – Especially on the toilet at school – But it just happened.” “I just don’t now what came over me, sir,” the blonde bombshell continues, “One minute I’m just sitting on the toilet and the next thing I know I’m rubbing myself down there.” “And then I just started rubbing myself harder and harder,” Bridgett explains, “Once I got started, I just couldn’t stop.” “I really didn’t mean to do that, sir – It just kind of happened,” she explains further, “I just got carried away, I guess.” “I just can’t believe I was doing that – Especially in the bathroom at school,” Bridgett says, “It’s not something I’d ever done before – I swear.”

“There’s nothing wrong with masturbation, Bridgett – It’s all perfectly natural,” Miss Callahan tells her, “It’s just that you can’t really be doing it in the girls’ room at school.”
“That’s very true, Bridgett,” I tell the embarrassed senior beauty, “That’s obviously an activity best left to the privacy of your own bedroom rather than the girls’ room at school.” “Yes sir – I understand,” Bridgett acknowledges. “And speaking of privacy, Bridgett, I can’t believe you were doing that without even closing the stall door,” the pretty, young Art teacher tells her, “I mean, it’s not that I condone masturbating in the girls’ room at all, but if you are going to do it, I’d think you’d at least want to close the stall door when you do.” “Its’ not only Bridgett, but I’m quite puzzled by that as well. Certainly, Bridgett is not one to be particularly self-conscious about her bodily functions (much unlike her sister Kerri), but I’d still think Bridgett would be one to close the stall door – Even if she was just going in there to urinate. Naturally, I ask her about leaving the stall door open. But Bridgett just looks at me puzzled. “I didn’t think I was allowed to close the stall door,” she tells me. Now, I’m looking at Bridgett puzzled. She may not be one of the smarter girls at our school, but her somehow believing she’s not allowed to close the stall door is baffling.

But Mrs. Crabtree, a member of the TVPC, quickly figures it out. “Were you on toilet sitting punishment?” Mrs. Crabtree asks Bridgett, “Were you on punishment 4th period for that squatting violation last week?” Given that it was Bridgett’s 2nd time this year squatting over the toilet with the toilet seat still down – And give that it was also for a bowel movement – The TVPC not only gave her detention and writing punishment but a week of toilet sitting during her study hall period. “Yes Ma’am – I was doing my toilet sitting punishment,” Bridgett tells Mrs. Crabtree, “That’s what I was doing on the toilet in the first place.” “And that’s why I left the stall door open while I was sitting,” she then explains, “I thought that we had to leave the stall door open while we were doing toilet sitting punishment.” “You’re correct on that,” I tell her, “The stall door must remain open the whole time you’re doing toilet sitting punishment.” “And it was while you were sitting there on toilet sitting punishment that you started masturbating?” I ask her. “Yes sir – I was just sitting on the toilet like I was supposed to,” she says, “But you know, it does get kind of boring just sitting there.” “I mean, I’m not trying to say it as an excuse or anything – I know there’s no excuse for doing what I did,” she continues, “But like I said, it’s really boring to just be sitting on the toilet when you don’t actually have to go.” “And that’s when I just started doing it, sir,” Bridgett admits, “I just started rubbing myself and then it really got out of hand before Miss Callahan caught me.” “I’m sorry, sir,” she says, “I’m really sorry.”

Certainly, I believe Bridgett’s contrition – She’s obviously quite embarrassed by what she’s done – But unfortunately, she’s in more trouble than we originally thought. “Unfortunately, you’re not only guilty of masturbating in the girls’ room,” I tell Bridgett, “You’re also guilty of violating your toilet sitting punishment.” “When you are assigned toilet sitting punishment, you are supposed to just sit there and think about what you’ve done to get that punishment,” I continues, “Obviously, you’re not supposed to masturbate while doing that punishment.” I then direct the TVPC to draw up another Violation Report on Bridgett – This one for “Violating Toilet Sitting Punishment.”

“I get a separate punishment for that?” she then asks. When I inform her that she does, it sets her into panic mode about getting put on toilet suspension. “Please sir – Please don’t put me on toilet suspension,” she pleads, “I just don’t know what I’ll do if I can’t use the toilet in school.” “I’ll just about die if I have to go in my pants everyday,” she pleads some more. I turn and see Kerri with a big smile on her face – Obviously, once again enjoying her sister’s predicament. “I really hate to disappoint you, Kerri,” I tell her sarcastically, intending, of course, that Bridgett hear me as well, “But your sister isn’t going to be put on toilet suspension for this.” “So I guess you can wipe that smile off your face, young lady,” I tell Kerri, “Apparently, you’re still going to be the only one in your family going to the bathroom in your pants.” Bridgett, breathing a deep sigh of relief about not going on toilet suspension, manages a small smile as Kerri is put in her place once again.

But Bridgett’s really got nothing to smile about, either. “Just because you’re not getting a toilet suspension, doesn’t mean you’ll be let off easy,” I tell her, “Masturbating in the girls’ room is a serious offense and the TVPC also takes it very seriously when a girl violates a TVPC punishment like you did.” First, I sentence her to write, “I will not masturbate in the girls’ room in school again” 500 times and to serve a week in detention. “That’s your punishment, of course, for the masturbating itself,” I point out, “Next, you’ll get your punishment for violating your toilet sitting punishment.” On that charge, she’ll have to write a 2,000 word essay on the Rules of Toilet Sitting Punishment and she’ll have to serve 2 more weeks of toilet sitting punishment during her study hall period. “And when you’re doing that, please keep your hands where they’re supposed to be, Bridgett,” I warn her, “Toilet sitting punishment may be boring, but boring is what you have to do sometime.” “For a 2nd offense, the punishment gets a whole lot worse, I warn her further, “Kerri will have company going to the bathroom in her pants, if you know what I mean.” As I noted before, Bridgett isn’t the brightest of students, but she gets that message for sure.

For the last item on this afternoon’s TVPC agenda we have a bit of committee business. For this, I call Bella, a pretty but gaunt and pale-looking junior, before the TVPC. “I see that you’ve already handed in your sentence writing punishment,” I tell her, “But we still haven’t gotten your punishment essay.” “As I’m sure you know, young lady, all punishment assignments are due in 1 week,” I explain, “And that deadline, Bella, is right now.”

It was at a TVPC session 1 week ago, that Bella was punished for using a faculty bathroom. Specifically, she was caught using the bathroom in the librarian’s office and she used it for a bowel movement. Her excuse, of course, was that that bathroom is so much nicer and more private than using the regular girls’ room facilities that she’s supposed to use. The TVPC promptly punished her with 500 times of “I will not use a faculty bathroom in school again” and 1 week of detention. And largely because she’s a junior now (not quite the TWILIGHT of her high school career but she’s not just starting out, either) and really should know better, I tacked on a 1,000 word punishment essay entitled, “Why I Shouldn’t Use Faculty Bathrooms.” Today, she’ll serve the last of her 5 days detention and as I previously noted, she’s already handed in the repetitive writing assignment. All that’s left now is the 1,000 word punishment essay.

“I trust that you have it finished by now,” I tell her. “Yes, sir,” she then tells me, holding up a folder which I presume contains her essay. As directed, Bella hands the folder to our TVPC clerk. Our clerk looks it over and announces that it appears to be in good order and complete. This essay will, of course, be checked more closely later but for now, it is accepted. “I hope that essay made you think about what you did,” I tell the introverted junior beauty. “Yes, sir, it did,” she tells me, “It was really stupid of me to use the librarian’s bathroom like I did.” “I’m happy to hear that you’ve learned your lesson,” I tell her, “That’s what the TVPC is for.” “It’s just that it’s so nice a bathroom,” Bella also tells me, “But from now on, I’ll just use the girls’ room like I should.” “Well, make sure that you do,” I then warn her, “You’ll lose your toilet privileges for a 2nd offense.”

So concludes another session of the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee. Meeting adjourned at 3:59 PM.

[Arnold Ziffel]

Bella's Punishment Essay

Name: Bella

TVPC Punishment Essay

Offense: Using a Faculty/Staff Bathroom

Offense Date: April 24, 2014

Length: 1,000 Words

Due Date: May 1, 2014

I am writing this essay as part of my punishment for using the office bathroom in the library last Thursday. I used that bathroom even though I know that bathroom is for teachers and staff members only and that students are not allowed to use it. I am very sorry that I used that bathroom and I promise that I’m never going to use it again. I realize that if I do use it again, I will be punished again and that punishment will be a lot worse than I’m being this time. I also realize that I am very lucky that I didn’t get punished worse this time, especially since I left such bad skidmarks in the toilet bowl in there. Like I said, I am very sorry that I went to the bathroom in a teachers’ bathroom and I promise that I’ll never do it again.

I realize that there is no excuse for a student to use a faculty bathroom, but I just want to say that I only used it because I had to go really, really bad and I didn’t want to mess in my panties again. I really don’t like going poop in my panties – I think it’s really disgusting and it makes it even worse when you wet your panties, too. I only used that bathroom in the librarian’s office because I didn’t want to poop in my panties again on Thursday. I was really desperate not to poop in my panties again. Please understand that I just did this because I didn’t want to make in my panties again.

I understand that when I have to go to the bathroom, I’m supposed to use one of the girls’ rooms. But I just don’t like going in there when I have to make. I go in there to pee all the time, but I really don’t like to go in there when I have to make. It’s kind of hard to explain in this essay, but I just like to have more privacy when I have to make. I just really only like to make in my own bathroom at home where I can be by myself and have my privacy.

That’s how I end up messing in my panties so much. It’s that when I’m at school I keep trying to hold it in and wait until I get home to do it. But sometimes I just can’t hold it in anymore and I end up making a mess in my panties instead. I really don’t try to go in my panties. It’s just that sometimes I can’t hold it in long enough to make it home to use my own bathroom. I know that it’s not an excuse – I know that I have to be responsible for my own bodily functions and that means not going in my panties anymore – But it’s just really hard for me to use the girls’ rooms when I have to make. I’m trying really hard to do the right thing and not mess in my panties anymore, but that is really hard for me.

I am really sorry for using the librarian’s bathroom like I did, but I really was only trying to avoid messing in my panties again. I really don’t even like using any public bathroom when I have to make – I only like to do that in my own toilet at home – But that bathroom in the librarian’s office is just so much better than any of the girls’ rooms here in school. And using that bathroom there is better than going in my panties. I know that we students are not allowed to use any faculty or staff bathroom and that includes the one in the library, but that one in the library is just so nice. I guess it’s really a public bathroom but it’s kind of like a private bathroom with the privacy it has. It’s just like a regular bathroom at home where only one person goes in at a time and locks the door. It isn’t as good as my own bathroom at home but at least it has a lot of privacy which I need when I have to make. I wish that all bathrooms were like that one where you can get privacy. I certainly wouldn’t be having all those accidents in my pants if I could use a bathroom like that all the time. Why do public bathrooms have to be like they are with a bunch of stalls where you have to make with another girl in the next stall doing the same thing? Why can’t all public bathrooms be like the one in the librarian’s office where one girl could go in there one at a time, lock the door, and just sit down and do her business with privacy?

I really don’t mean this an excuse – I know that there is no excuse for a student to be using a faculty bathroom and I know that I need to use the girls’ room instead – but that bathroom in the librarian’s office is just so nice. Last Thursday, I just had to go to the bathroom really, really bad and I knew that I wasn’t going to be able to hold it in much longer. If I didn’t do something I was definitely going to mess in my panties again. And I really didn’t want to mess in my panties again. I’m really getting sick and tired of messing my panties. So I had to do something really quick and that bathroom in the librarian’s office just looked so nice and inviting. As I said, I knew I wasn’t supposed to be using it and I’m not trying to make an excuse for using it, but it is such a nice bathroom and I was really desperate to go. I know that I should have gone to one of the student girls’ rooms, but I just didn’t – I used the faculty bathroom instead.

Once again, I am very sorry for what I did and I promise that I will never do it again. In the future, I must learn to use the girls’ room when I have to make in school.

[spandexman]

Amazing Grace

Grace really needs help with her BMs. She most likely soils herself a lot more than you think Arnold, it is how few times she and Miss Spellman get caught. Keep up the good work and will Grace's soiled red spandex shorts be auctioned off anytime soon?

[spandexman]

Hope all is well Arnold

Hope all is well.

[Guest]

Hopefully he's just taking a well-deserved vacation. The girls at the school have been keeping him incredibly busy!

Hope all is well.

[spandexman]

Arnold you are missed

Miss your stories and reports Arnold. Hope all is well.

[Guest]

Same here.