Toilet Violations Punishment Committee

[Arnold Ziffel]

Welcome to a session of the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee (TVPC) – this writer’s favorite fantasy. The story takes place in a high school not unlike other high schools. In this high school, however, there are strict rules regarding the toileting behavior of the school’s female students. Those who break the school toilet rules (including the rules against going to the bathroom in your pants) are brought before the TVPC to have their cases heard and their punishment given out if they are guilty. Meetings of the TVPC are called to order at 3:10 PM each school day in the TVPC meeting room – Room 222 of the high school. It should be noted that where this story takes place you need to be 18 in order to enter high school so all persons depicted, even though entirely fictional, are at least 18 years of age.

My name is Arnold Ziffel and I’m chairman of the TVPC. What follows are the summary minutes of the TVPC meeting of Friday, January 3, 2020.

We begin today’s session of the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee (TVPC) with several items of committee business related to matters arising from our annual Christmas program. As faithful readers of the TVPC surely know, one of the highlights of the holiday season at our school every year is the Christmas program. The program -- involving both band and choral music as well as theater component -- is a huge annual event at our school. It is heavily attended by both faculty and students as well as the public at large. The performances never cease to impress but unfortunately it typically also necessitates a special session of the TVPC to deal with the toilet violations occurring during the program. Obviously, it being a school event, the toilet behavior of the female students in the program is subject to TVPC jurisdiction. And this year, unfortunately, there seems to have been even more toilet violations than usual.

This year with the program occurring on the night of Friday, December 20th -- the last school day before the Christmas Break -- we scheduled a special session of the TVPC for the following Friday (December 27th) to deal with those toilet violations occurring during the program. Now, on January 3rd -- one week later -- the punishment writing assignments assigned at that session (and there were many!) are due. Girls can, of course, hand in those punishments ahead of the due date, but if they don’t do that, today’s session is their last chance to hand them in before the punishments get doubled.

Ruthie, a sophomore clarinet player in the school band is being asked to hand in 500 times of “I will not soil my panties in school or at school events again.” Such was her punishment, of course, for soiling her panties at the Christmas program. “I have it right here, sir,” she tells me, holding up a thick packet of paper, “I stayed up late last night to get it all finished.” As directed, she then hands her completed punishment to our TVPC clerk. “You had several days over Christmas Break to finish it,” I tell her, “There really was no reason why you had to be up late last night to get it done.” “I mean, it doesn’t matter as long as you did get it done,” I clarify, “But I’m just surprised that you seemed to have waited until the last minute to get it done.”

Ruthie, on the other hand, takes the occasion to complain about the severity of her punishment. “This was just ridiculous, sir,” she tells me, “It was ridiculous that I had to write 500 times for this.” The complaint echoes what she said one week ago when she was given the punishment. “It was my first mess,” she reminds me, “It was the first time that I messed in my panties since I was a freshman.” “Most girls just get a warning for their first accident,” she argues, “But I get 500 lines instead.” “And then I get a whole week of detention on top of that,” she adds, “That was all just totally ridiculous.”

But I explain, just as I did last week, that this wasn’t the same as merely having an accident in school. “This was an accident while representing the school,” I remind her, “You did it at a big school event in front of not only your fellow students but well over a thousand people.” “What you did not only embarrassed yourself,” I lecture her, “But you also embarrassed not only the band but the whole school in front of the community.” As faithful readers of the TVPC surely know, such an accident -- an accident “while representing the school” -- is punished more severely. Ruthie, a spunky blonde-haired cutie, starts to argue further -- insisting just as she did last week that having to write 500 times and serve a whole week in detention was still too severe a punishment for only a first panty-soiling offense. But I abruptly stop her. “We had this discussion last week when I explained it all to you,” I remind her sternly, “We’re not going to rehash it all again now.”

Turning now to our TVPC clerk, he notes that the girl’s punishment appears to be complete and in good order. He notes that the assignment is written quite neatly, utilizing both sides of the paper and is numbered properly as is required. Accordingly, the punishment is accepted. Ruthie is then dismissed, mumbling something about being glad that it’s all over as she leaves.

Kurstan is a junior brunette and she sings in the school choir. She also soiled her panties at the Christmas program. Unlike Ruthie who complained about being punished for her first offense of the school year, Kurstan has no such complaint. Though it was only her first panty-soiling “while representing the school,” she had had 3 prior panty-soiling offenses in school this year -- including one doubleheader. As the junior beauty steps up to the podium, she has a considerably thick packet of paper in her hand. She is being asked to hand in that same sentence -- “I will not soil my panties in school or at school events again” -- written 1,000 times. Her punishment, of course, was more severe because of the 3 prior offenses.

Kurstan -- a shy and quiet sort -- just nods her head when I ask her if she completed her punishment. She does as she’s told when I tell her to hand the completed punishment to our TVPC clerk. He reacts to the sheer thickness of the packet of paper that the girl handed in. He notes that Kurstan wrote on only one side of the paper thereby doubling the number of pages even beyond what a 1,000 times punishment usually requires. There’s nothing wrong with that, of course, as girls have the choice of whether to utilize one or both sides of the paper, but most girls do seem to write on both sides -- especially when they have long assignments like this.

“Either way, I bet that was a lot of work,” I tell her. “That’s for sure,” she tells me, nodding her head. “I’m thinking it wasn’t exactly what you wanted to be doing over your Christmas break,” I suggest. “I’d rather be doing just about anything else than writing those stupid lines,” she tells me, “And it took like forever to finish them.” “Well, all that could have been avoided if you’d have just gone in the toilet when you were supposed to,” I point out, “A few minutes on the toilet could have saved you a lot of time writing lines and a lot of time sitting in detention.” “Yes, sir,” she tells me, acknowledging the obvious. “Messing your panties in school is bad enough,” I admonish her, “But it’s even worse when you do it at a school event in front of lots of other people.” She nods her head in acknowledgement of that -- That’s apparently a lesson she’s had to learn the hard way. She had, of course, written lines before -- as noted, she did have 3 prior panty-soilings -- but never anything even close to 1,000 lines before.

Checking with our TVPC clerk, he acknowledges that the writing -- all 1,000 times -- appears to be complete and in good order. He does raise an issue with the legibility of some of it, though. All punishment writing assignments that girls hand in must, of course, be legible in order to be accepted. Our clerk notes that portions of the writing appear to be quite sloppy but that it does fall within the range of what is acceptable. Kurstan explains that it was hard doing so much writing and that it was hard maintaining the same standard of neatness when your hand starts to get tired from writing so much. That much is to be expected and, as noted, the writing was indeed within the acceptable standard of legibility.

Emily, a very pretty junior flute player in the band also soiled her panties at the Christmas program that night, but it’s not her punishment for that that has her before the TVPC this afternoon. She already handed in her punishment for that -- “I will not soil my panties in school or at school events again” 500 times -- yesterday morning. Today, she is being asked to hand in a second 500 times assignment that she was given at that TVPC Special Session last Friday. She is being asked to hand in 500 times of “I will not lie about toilet-related matters again” -- the additional punishment having been issued for lying to Mrs. Sylvester at the meeting. Mrs. Sylvester, of course, is our Band and Choir Director and she was in charge of the Christmas Show.

Calling Emily to the podium now, she does have some papers in her hand but it certainly doesn’t look like anything close to 500 times. “I’ve got some of it done, sir,” she tells me, apparently holding up what she does have, “I’ve got some of it done, but I just couldn’t finish all of it in time.” “Not after having written the first 500 times assignment, I certainly didn’t have time to finish another one in time,” she tells me further, in a particularly snide tone. The implication, apparently, is that while she accepts having to write the 500 times for her accident, she still thinks the second 500 times was out of line. But Mrs. Sylvester, who was in charge of the program, takes particular exception to that.

“I told you, just like I told every other girl who went in her pants that night,” Mrs. Sylvester angrily reminds Emily, “I told you that I wanted you girls to wear the same underwear you were wearing that night at the show to the TVPC session the following Friday.” The point of wearing the same underwear, of course, was to force the girls to have them to clean them. “If it were up to me, I’d have had you all in the girls’ locker room after the show cleaning out your underwear there,” the strict teacher lectures, “You should have considered yourself lucky that I was letting you clean them in the privacy of your own bathrooms at home.” “But you had to press your luck, didn’t you,” Mrs. Sylvester lectures Emily, “Apparently you thought you were too good to have to clean out your own soiled underwear.” “I’m quite disappointed in you, young lady,” she admonishes the junior beauty, “I thought very highly of you but apparently you’re nothing but a PRETTY LITTLE LIAR.”

But Emily -- who wore different underwear to the meeting and then lied about it -- takes exception to that. “You know it wasn’t like I was ever going to wear those panties again,” she argues, “I don’t care how much you scrub and clean them, once panties get messed in, they’re never going to be clean enough to wear again.” “As far as I’m concerned, one poop in a pair of panties and they go straight into the trash,” Emily argues, “No way is it worth cleaning out the mess.” And that is apparently exactly what she did with her soiled panties rather than clean and re-wear them to the TVPC meeting as directed by Mrs. Sylvester. “You know, it’s not like I mess in my panties all the time, you know,” the pretty brunette points out. Unlike our 2 prior matters today, this clearly wasn’t a case of a girl reluctant to do her business in a crowded girls’ room at the intermission of the show. This was apparently a matter of the poor girl eating an ill-advised fast food meal that night before the show and then not quite making it to intermission in time. Her friend Teddy -- who went to the “Quickie-Chickie” with her that night -- had a similar emergency but fortunately she did make it to the toilet in time at intermission. “Like I said, it’s not like I mess in my panties all the time,” she tells Mrs. Sylvester, in a bit of condescending tone, “I think I can afford to throw away one pair of panties.” Mrs. Sylvester, not surprisingly, doesn’t like either her tone or her attitude. “As far as I’m concerned when you mess in your panties, you clean up the mess,” she angrily tells the girl, “And after that maybe you learn to be a little more careful with your bodily functions.” “I don’t care how often it happens -- I don’t care if it’s only your first accident,” she continues lecturing Emily, “A girl your age shouldn’t be messing in her panties at all.”

With that, I quickly grab my gavel and bang it. Obviously, this need not become a debate. We went over all this at last Friday’s Special Session and there’s no need to rehash it all now. “We’re here for you to hand in your punishment,” I tell Emily and note for the record. With that, the junior beauty then hands her punishment over to the TVPC clerk. Looking it over -- the few pages that she did hand in -- he’s surprised to note that she’s also only written on one side of the paper. And we’re all surprised when he notes that Emily has completed only 150 of the 500 lines she was assigned to write. As I and the rest of the TVPC look at her surprised, she explains that she only finished the first 500 times assignment yesterday. “I’m sorry,” she says, a tone of sarcasm in her voice, “But after all the time it took to write the first one, I really didn’t have much time to write another one.” Quickly doing the math -- and obviously resisting the chance to argue further with her -- I note that 350 sentences not done amounts to 700 that she owes us now. “And those are due again one week from today,” I remind and warn her, “And this time if you don’t have it finished you go on toilet suspension until you do.” “Don’t you think it would have been easier to just have cleaned your soiled underwear like you were supposed to,” Mrs. Sylvester chimes in, “Maybe next time you won’t try to get by with a fresh pair of panties and then lie to me about it.” Emily -- WISELY -- has nothing to say to that.

Quickly moving on, I next call before the TVPC, a well-manner junior blonde named DJ. Fortunately, she was one who made it through the Christmas program two weeks ago without soiling her panties. In fact, she was one who actually did do a bowel movement in the toilet during the intermission of the program. That in spite of it being crowded at -- a FULL HOUSE, as DJ puts it -- at the time. Unfortunately for her, though, she did that bowel movement in a toilet that was clogged. It wasn’t that she herself clogged I, but she used it apparently not knowing that it had previously been clogged. TVPC investigators are currently looking into the specific circumstances of how that toilet became clogged. Faithful readers of the TVPC surely know that girls are only permitted to do their business -- especially bowel movements -- in toilets that are working properly. DJ is being asked to hand in 250 times of, “I will not defecate in a clogged toilet again.” She nods her head that she has it done, but I’m quite frankly surprised that she hadn’t handed it in prior to this. Naturally, I ask her about this.

“It was only 250 times, DJ,” I tell the pretty and likeable honor student, “I would have certainly thought you’d have finished it beforehand.” DJ nods her head in agreement -- like she is surprised at that as well. “I wrote a bunch of it the first day I got the punishment,” she tells us, “But then I put it aside to finish later.” “But then I just kept putting it off and putting it off,” she explains, “I knew I had a week to finish it and somehow I just let it sit on my desk at home.” “Then suddenly I realized that time was up -- that it was due today,” she explains further, “I actually had to finish it in study hall today.” She apologizes for taking so long to finish it and for taking up the TVPC’s time now to hand it in at the last minute. “Well, you did get it in in time,” I tell her with a smile, “That’s what’s most important.”

“What’s most important is that you did your business in the toilet that night,” Mrs. Adler chimes in, “That’s more than I can say for some of your show-mates.” “Well, I certainly wouldn’t want to go in my pants, ma’am -- that’s just disgusting,” DJ tells the committeewoman, “I don’t know how some girls can stand it -- having that disgusting mess in their pants all the time.” “I mean, I did do it once a long time ago and I never want to do it again,” she says, “I never want to have that feeling of having a mess in my panties again.” “I just don’t get how some girls won’t use the bathroom when they need to,” DJ says, shaking her head, “I mean, it’s not like I particularly like going #2 here at school, either, but it’s certainly way better than going in my pants.” “I mean, anything is better than going in our pants,” she adds, “That’s just disgusting!” I do note, though, that DJ does have a “pants-wetting” violation earlier this year -- an accident that was adjudicated at our Sept. 18th TVPC session. “Well, I’m not proud of that, either, sir,” DJ notes, “But that really isn’t as bad as doing the other in my pants.”

Checking with our TVPC clerk, he notes that DJ’s 250 lines appear to be complete and in good order. He notes that DJ wrote on both sides of the paper and he compliments the girl on her neatness and legibility. “Well, I know it’s supposed to be legible,” she says, shrugging her shoulders, “I guess 250 times wasn’t so bad.”

[Arnold Ziffel]

Toilet Violations Punishment Committee

Fans of our school’s Christmas shows and other musical programs should have no trouble recognizing a girl named Claudia. Claudia, now a senior, is an accomplished violinist and has been a featured performer in our Christmas programs for the past four years. This year, as in past years, she performed not only as a soloist on her violin but with four other performers in what we call the PARTY OF FIVE ensemble. As fans of our Christmas shows have come to expect, it was one of the highlights of the evening. Unfortunately for her, though, she also has a hefty writing assignment to hand in this afternoon -- a writing assignment I can only assume is in the folder she’s holding in her hand.

Unfortunately for Claudia, faithful readers of the TVPC should have no trouble recognizing her, either. She’s had issues throughout her high school career with handling her bathroom business -- especially bowel movements -- in school. And unfortunately at these musical programs, her bathroom issues have sometimes been almost as memorable as her violin performances. In addition to her many panty-soiling accidents over the years in school, she’s had a few -- “while representing the school” -- at these musical programs as well. One time, she even had a soiling accident in a pair of pull-ups training pants that she was required to wear that night.

As Claudia stands before the TVPC this afternoon, I can’t help but be amazed at how she’s gone from a sweet but shy gawky freshman to the stunningly beautiful young woman that she is today. But apparently her issues with her bowel movements in school -- especially at these musical performances -- remain. While this time she managed not to soil her panties, that’s not to say that the bowel movement she had to do that night didn’t get her into trouble. This time her punishment was to write “I will not use a faculty restroom in school or at musical performances again” 1,000 times. As the petite senior beauty stands there at the podium, I can’t help but shake my head disapprovingly at her. “You said you were going to do better this year,” I remind her, “You said that you were a senior now and these toileting issues were going to stop.” “I didn’t go in my pants,” Claudia responds, “I went in the toilet like I was supposed to.” “You didn’t go in the toilet like you were supposed to,” I argue back, “You went in a faculty bathroom -- You didn’t go in the girls’ room.” “I went in the toilet, sir -- I didn’t mess in my panties,” she insists, “I had to go and I did it in the toilet like I was supposed to.” Hearing that, I’m left just shaking my head. She obviously knows that she’s only allowed to use the student girls’ rooms and not the faculty ones. I see no need to debate with her.

Mrs. Adler, though, can’t resist arguing further with her. “You’re supposed to do your business in the student girls’ rooms and that’s especially true when you need to do a bowel movement,” she tells the girl, “You’re not supposed to go sneaking into a faculty bathroom to do it.” But Claudia is still fixated on the fact that she did indeed use a toilet. I guess considering her past issues, she considers that at least an improvement. “I didn’t mess in my pants,” she insists -- in a bit of a frustrated tone, “You wanted me to go in the toilet and I went in the toilet.” “And I wanted me to go in the toilet, too,” she says, “I didn’t want to go in my pants, either.” “What difference does it make what toilet I did it in,” she argues, “As long as I did it in the toilet instead of in my pants.” “I didn’t mess in my pants and I still get 1,000 lines,” Claudia argues further, now starting to cry, “I can’t believe I still get punished like that when I go in the toilet.” With that, Claudia breaks down into tears -- crying forcefully. .

Not wanting to get into this further with her -- we discussed all this previously at the December 27th Special Session when she was initially given her punishment -- I simply put up my hand to end the discussion. I then direct her to hand her completed punishment to our TVPC clerk. Claudia does as she’s told but, in doing so, can’t resist complaining again about getting 1,000 lines for (as she claims) simply going in the toilet like she was supposed to. “It’s not for going in the toilet,” I then angrily tell her, “If you’d have simply used a student girls’ room like you were supposed to, you obviously wouldn’t have been punished at all.” “And it obviously does make a difference which particular bathroom you use,” I continuing lecturing the toilet-troubled senior beauty, “You know very well that you’re not allowed to use the faculty bathrooms but you did it anyway.” “You told us that you’re a senior now -- You told us that you were too old to keep having these toilet issues,” I continue, “And two weeks ago, you messed in your panties at rehearsal and then you use the faculty bathroom at the show itself.” “It was better than going in my pants,” Claudia, in turn, answers me right back.

“But it wasn’t as good as using the student girls’ room like you were supposed to,” Mrs. Adler then jumps back in. “If you didn’t want to use the girls’ room in the hallway because it was too crowded or whatever, you could have always used the bathroom in the girls’ locker room,” she notes, “As I understand it, we had the locker room bathrooms open and available only to performers in the show.” “Ewww! -- that one is even worse than the one in the hallway,” Claudia complains, “I just wanted to have a decent bathroom where it was clean and I could get a little privacy.” I really am trying to do better, sir,” she insists, as the tears flow, “Is it really too much to ask to have a little privacy and a clean toilet to do it in when I have to make.” Claudia had previously claimed her intent in going upstairs that night was to use one of the student girls’ room upstairs and away from the crowd. She claimed to have used the faculty bathroom up there only as a last resort when she found the student facilities locked. Whether that’s true or not, I can’t be sure and it’s largely irrelevant anyway. The only thing that matters is that Claudia did her bowel movement in the faculty bathroom up there in main corridor rather than in one of the student facilities downstairs like she was supposed to.

Turning now to our TVPC clerk, he confirms that Claudia’s punishment appears to be complete and in good order. He notes that the writing is quite neat in parts and quite sloppy in others. That is oftentimes the case when girls have particularly lengthy assignments to complete. He assures us that even the sloppy portions of Claudia’s writing are well-within the acceptable standards of legibility. He further notes that Claudia utilized both sides of the paper in her writing. Claudia is then dismissed without further discussion.

Moving on to cases from today, I do a double take as I look at the Violation Report in our fist such case. I’m very surprised to see that the accused is Carly, a pretty and popular honor student who has had a very good toilet record throughout her high school career. But I’m outright shocked to see her charged with trying to flush her soiled panties down the toilet. That’s one of the TVPC’s most serious offenses – An offense for which the minimum punishment is 2 months on toilet suspension. And, of course, a girl that flushes her soiled panties down the toilet also soiled those panties in the first place. That’s a separate charge that Carly faces, but that’s the least of her problems at this point.

Apparently, Carly is denying her guilt, but Mrs. Montgomery, an English and Journalism teacher has filed the Violation Reports anyway. “I was in the Main Corridor girls’ room during 7th period this afternoon,” the enthusiastic first year teacher says, “And I caught Carly standing there in front of the stall next to an overflowing toilet.” “Then we got a custodian to unclog the toilet and find the source of the clog,” she explains. “It was a pair of pink bikini panties that were clogging the toilet,” Mrs. Montgomery points out, “And, not surprisingly, they had quite a mess in them.”

“Oh please! You’ve got to be kidding,” shouts out Sam, Carly’s best friend, “You’ve got to be crazy if you think Carly did that.” Sam, a pretty and outspoken (to say the least) blonde is here serving detention for mouthing off to a teacher in the girls’ room earlier this week. “Don’t you have enough writing to do already,” I warn Sam, “I don’t think you’d want another 500 times for calling out at this meeting, do you?” “No sir, but I just can’t believe that Mrs. Montgomery would think Carly did that,” she says, “She can’t punish Carly for something she didn’t do.” Simultaneously, both Carly and I put up a hand signaling Sam to stop. “I think Carly can speak for herself, Sam – She’ll have a chance to tell her side of the story,” I tell the detention veteran, “She’s not going to get punished for something she didn’t do.” Carly, though a bit shy sometimes, is clearly the more intelligent and articulate of the 2 of them.

Turning to Carly, I ask the friendly and likeable honor student to clarify her plea. I remind her that she’s charged with 2 separate offenses – specifically, “Panty-Soiling” and also “Flushing Soiled Panties Down The Toilet.” I’m not sure if she denies both charges or if she admits to the panty-soiling and only denies trying to flush them down the toilet. I ask her to clarify this for the record. “I CARLY, plead ‘Not Guilty’ to panty-soiling,” she answers, “And not having soiled my panties in the first place, I’d have no reason to flush them down the toilet.”

But Mrs. Montgomery reiterates that she caught Carly standing next to an overflowing toilet – A toilet clogged with soiled panties. “Carly was in the stall using the toilet,” the pretty first-year teacher reports, “But then when she flushed the toilet, I heard her scream.” When I went to see what was going on, I saw that the toilet was starting to overflow.” “And, as I said, we found it was a pair of messy panties that was clogging the toilet and caused it to overflow,” she says, glaring at Carly, “Obviously, someone messed in those panties and then tried to flush them.”

Carly, however, emphatically maintains her innocence. “I know that SOMEONE tried to flush those panties,” the pretty honor student says, “But that someone just wasn’t me.” “I went to the girls’ room and used the toilet,” she says, “I had a bowel movement in the toilet like I was supposed to.” “It’s just that when I tried to flush the toilet, something went wrong,” she explains, “Immediately when I flushed it, the water starting rising up the rim of the bowl and then started to overflow.” “Obviously there were messy panties clogging the toilet and obviously someone tried to flush them,” Carly acknowledges, “But I guess that must have happened before I even got there -- I know that I didn’t do it.” Upon questioning, Carly admits that she had kind of an emergency in getting to the toilet earlier this afternoon. “Mrs. Defequer wouldn’t let me go because I had already used up all my passes,” the senior beauty tells us, “So I was holding it in all through French class.” After class, I just ran for the toilet as fast as I could,” Carly continues, “I had to go so bad that I just plopped my butt down on the toilet seat without even locking the stall door.” The point being that Carly didn’t even look into the toilet before using it and therefore wouldn’t have seen if the toilet was clogged before she did her bowel movement into it.

“How convenient,” Mrs. Montgomery tells Carly sarcastically, “How convenient that you didn’t manage to notice that the toilet was clogged before you used it.” Carly’s excuse is actually a confession to a different toilet violation – specifically, defecating (and perhaps urinating as well) into a clogged toilet – But I’ll get to that in a minute. Flushing the soiled panties is the far more serious violation and we need to resolve that first. Mrs. Montgomery remains skeptical of Carly’s story. “I suppose it’s just a coincidence that the panties in the toilet were not only your size but the same style you wear,” she says, “Nice coincidence that the panties were clogged in the same toilet that you just happened to be using.” “They were plain pink panties,” Carly points out, “I bet half the girls in the school were panties like that and I bet half of those are the same size as me.”

“If you want to find the girl who flushed those panties you shouldn’t be looking for a girl wearing the SAME panties,” Carly suggests, “You should be looking for a girl who isn’t wearing ANY panties.” “I mean, I’m still wearing my panties,” the articulate brunette explains, “I don’t see how I could have flushed my panties and then still be wearing them.” It is possible that a girl could flush one pair and then be wearing another pair, but Carly has a valid point. I’m beginning to think that our first year English/Journalism teacher has been a bit overzealous and jumped to conclusions in bringing this case against Carly. I ask her if Carly was wearing panties at the time of this incident – while she was “standing next to an overflowing toilet” as she had so vividly phrased it earlier. “Carly definitely had panties on,” Mrs. Montgomery acknowledges, “She hadn’t pulled up her jeans yet as the toilet was overflowing, but she had definitely pulled up her panties.” “And those panties were clean?” I ask her, “No evidence of any wetting or soiling in them?” The young teacher confirms that that was indeed the case. “And your panties are clean and dry now?” I ask Carly. “Yes they are, sir,” she proudly answers. That pretty much confirms Carly’s innocence – At least as to what she’s currently charged with.

We’ll deal with Carly using a clogged toilet in a minute,” I point out and note for the record, “But I’m going to find her ‘Not Guilty’ of ‘Panty-Soiling’ and most importantly, ‘Not Guilty’ of ‘Flushing Soiled Panties Down the Toilet.’” “As Carly noted, we need to be looking for a girl who wasn’t wearing any panties today,” I point out to Mrs. Montgomery, “That’s a girl who may have tried to flush her panties down the toilet earlier in the day.”

Carly is understandably relieved to found “Not Guilty” of this very serious offense. But even not having flushed the soiled panties and clogged the toilet herself, Carly still did use the clogged toilet and she used it for a bowel movement. Though it’s not a serious violation -- especially not a serious as trying to flush soiled panties -- it’s still a violation. I note that for the record. But Carly complains that she simply didn’t realize that the toilet was clogged. “Like I said, I kind of had an emergency and just plopped my butt down on the seat and went,” the pretty senior brunette tells us, “I just didn’t realize that the toilet was already clogged.” “If I’d know the toilet was clogged, I’d have just used another stall,” Carly explained, “I just don’t know it was clogged when I went and used it.” I, of course, believe Carly on that point, but it really doesn’t matter. “TVPC rules are quite specific, Carly,” I tell her and note for the record, “Girls are only permitted to use toilet that are functioning properly and that‘s especially true when girls have bowel movements.” “I’ll note, of course, that you didn’t do it on purpose and therefore it’s only a minor violation,” I note further,” But unfortunately it still is a toilet violation.” Carly is sentenced to an hour of detention and having to write “I will not defecate in a clogged toilet again” 200 times. Carly is not particularly pleased at that but given what she initially faced as punished for trying to flush soiled panties, she’s not all that upset, either.

[Arnold Ziffel]

Toilet Violations Punishment Committee

Like most days at the TVPC we have several accident cases to deal with. First up we have a girl named Saffron. She‘s a quite pretty junior who is certainly no stranger to the latest fashions. I must say that she looks ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS even with a quite noticeable bulge in the seat of her jeans. She is actually charged with 2 counts of panty-soiling. “Two accidents?” I ask her, a bit puzzled, “You messed in your panties twice?” Saffron nods her head “yes.” “It happened yesterday in detention,” she then explains, “And then it happened again in 6th period French today.” Her accident in detention yesterday apparently happened too late in the day to include in yesterday’s TVPC session. Accidents on consecutive days does seem a bit odd, though, for a girl who has only had 1 prior accident this school year and only 2 others in her entire high school career. Of course, I ask her about this.

“Well, neither of them would have happened if I’d just been allowed to use the girls’ room when I asked,” the tall, pretty junior tells us, “I’m certainly not one of those girls who just holds it in when she knows she has to go.” “But I guess I should have known better,” she quickly clarifies, “I should have known better than to wait like I did and put myself in that position in the first place.” “And then after it happened yesterday, I certainly should have been smarter than to make that same mistake again today,” she adds. I must say that I’m impressed with her maturity in accepting responsibility for what she did and I tell her so. Saffron further explains that when she reported for detention yesterday – Detention with the principal for being late to school – She was indeed feeling the need to go. “It wasn’t an emergency, though, or anything close to it,” she explains, “So foolishly I decided to wait.” “I had already had a bowel movement in school yesterday – during Algebra 2nd period,” she explains further, “And I’d just been to the girls’ room to pee between 7th and 8th period.” “I just didn’t think I’d have an issue with having to go again during detention,” the junior beauty continues, “I thought I’d just wait until I got home or worst case scenario, I’d just go to the girls’ room when detention was over.” “But that’s not what happened, was it?” I ask her. “No sir, that’s not what happened,” she acknowledges, “I guess I had to go a lot worse than I thought.” “I asked Miss Robinson for permission to go to the girls’ room but she wouldn’t let me,” Saffron tells us, obviously embarrassed, “And that’s when I had my accident.” Miss Robinson, a very pretty, young Science teacher, was in charge of supervising the detention yesterday.

“You know the rules about detention,” Miss Robinson reminds her, “You should know that no girls’ room passes are allowed during detention.” “Yes Ma’am – I know the rules,” Saffron admits, “I know we’re always supposed to go to the girls’ room before going to detention.” “I was just kind of hoping that maybe you would give me a break or something,” she then tells the pretty Science teacher. “I just couldn’t sit there and go in my pants without even asking to go to the girls’ room,” Saffron explains, “I know I had to at least ask to go to the girls’ room before it was going to happen.” “But I’m not blaming you for what happened,” she then clarifies for Miss Robinson, “I know it was my own fault for not going before detention.” But she does point out that it was only a little bit in her panties. “I was able to hold it in enough that I did most of it in the toilet,” she says. The implication seems to be that Mrs. Robinson could have perhaps overlooked it and not charged her with the “panty-soiling” violation. “Well, yeah – You did do MOST of it in the toilet,” Miss Robinson acknowledges, “And I guess that’s a good thing.” “But it wasn’t like it was only a little smudge or skidmark now, was it?” she asks Saffron, “There was plenty enough of it in your panties for it be an accident, wasn’t there?” “Yes, Ma’am – I definitely had an accident,” the girl then reluctantly admits, “There was definitely a mess in my panties.”

Moving on to today’s panty-soiling accident, this one happened in 6th period French. It’s apparently another case of the teacher not letting her go to the girls’ room when she asked. Mrs. Defequer, her French Teacher, is, of course, here to present this case. “This one was no small accident,” Mrs. Defequer explains, “Saffron did quite a load in her panties this time.” “She’s cleaned herself quite a bit since,” Mrs. Defequer tells us, “But at the time she had a pretty big mess to deal with.” Embarrassed, the junior beauty admits that this was indeed the case. “Unfortunately, I had been holding this one in for a while,” she admits, “When Mrs. Defequer wouldn’t let me go to the girls’ room, I knew I was really in trouble.”

This makes me wonder if more than the usual dose of punishment is necessary in this case. When a girl’s accident is a particularly severe one, I’m inclined to give a more severe punishment than would ordinarily be the case. I ask Mrs. Defequer about this but she doesn’t think it’s necessary in this case. “I didn’t mean that it was as bad as all that – I’ve seen much worse,” the pretty French Teacher clarifies, “I don’t think it was anything more than just a good, healthy bowel movement in Saffron’s panties.” “I just mean that I think she did the whole thing in her panties,” Mrs. Defequer explains, “I don’t think she was able to hold any of it in like she did for her other one yesterday.” Saffron nods her head in agreement. “I guess I got lucky yesterday in detention – That one wasn’t so bad,” she explains, “Like I said I did do most of that one in the toilet afterwards.” “But unfortunately I wasn’t as lucky this time,” she says, “This time I couldn’t hold any of it in – This time I did the whole thing in my panties.” She also explains that she went to the girls’ room immediately after class and admits that she cleaned a lot of the mess out of her panties then. “I did what I could do in the girls’ room,” Saffron tells us, “But with only toilet paper and no change of panties, there was only so much I could do.”

Accepting that explanation, I’m still quite puzzled as to how she could let this happen. “Well, it was stupid – Really, really stupid,” Saffron tells us, “Especially after yesterday, I can’t believe that I could have been this stupid.” She admits that she had to go at lunch – The urge actually started the period before lunch – but she didn’t want to go at lunchtime. The comment irks the pretty French teacher. “I’m never going to understand the problem you girls have with doing that kind of thing at lunchtime,” Mrs. Defequer says, shaking her head, “Personally, I can’t imagine a more opportune time for you girls to do what you have to do.” Faithful readers of the TVPC surely know that there is a girls’ room across from the cafeteria that the girls can use anytime during their lunch period. “Obviously now I wish I had gone when I had the chance,” Saffron tells us. “I mean this time I knew I really did have to go here at school,“ she says, “I mean, I knew there was no way I was going to be holding this one in until I got home.” “It’s not like I’m always holding it in at school like some girls do – I do go and use the girls’ room at school when I need to,” she explains, “It’s just that some girls’ rooms are better than others – Especially when you gotta do what I had to do.” “I mean, when you just have to pee, pretty much any girls’ room will do,” Saffron continues, “But when you gotta do something more than that, I’d just rather not do it in the girls’ room by the cafeteria – Especially at lunchtime.” Apparently, with so many girls coming and going in the cafeteria girls’ room during the lunch periods, a lot of girls’ don’t like doing their bowel movements in there. “It’s just that I’d rather do it someplace other than in there,” Saffron tells us.

“So you decided NOT to go at lunch and instead wait for Mrs. Defequer’s class next period?” I ask her. “Yes, sir,” she answers, “I was planning to get a pass and then go use the girls’ room in the New Addition.” “I know it was my fault – I know I should have just used the girls’ room by the cafeteria when I had the chance,” the poor girl reiterates, “It’s just that the girls’ rooms upstairs are a lot nicer to use when you gotta do what I had to do.” “But I’m guessing that Mrs. Defequer didn’t give you that pass?” I ask her. “She said that I could go but first I had to give the answer to #5 on last nights’ homework,” Saffron then answers, “But since I hadn’t done the homework, she wouldn’t let me go.” “You know the rules, young lady,” Mrs. Defequer then tells her firmly, “If you want to get privileges like girls’ room passes in my class, you have to participate in class.” The pretty junior nods her head that she understands. “I know -- I know it was my own fault,” she says again, “I know I’ve got no one else to blame but me for this whole thing.

“Well, now comes the time when you’re going to have to pay for the price for all that,” I point out. As I’ve noted, she’s got 1 prior soiling accident in school this year – This one actually happening in the cafeteria back in November. She has 2 other violations – 1 for clogging a toilet with her bowel movement and toilet paper and 1 for accidentally leaving the toilet unflushed after a bowel movement. For yesterday’s accident – the one in detention – I sentence her to 2 days in detention and having to write, “I will not soil my panties in school again” 200 times. For today’s accident in French class, she gets 3 days in detention and has to write the same sentence 300 times. “Be careful, Saffron, “I warn her in closing, “Next time it’ll be 500 times and a week in detention for just the 1 accident.” Saffron answers that she will be careful. “Trust me, I’m just going to go when I need to next time,” she says, “I’m not going to wait and keep putting it off.”

For our next panty-soiling case, we have a very sweet and shy senior beauty named Winnie. Winnie -- or Gwendolyn as is her actual name -- is another senior who is still having issues using the bathroom at school. Naturally, I address that with her. “Shame on you, Winnie,” I admonish her, as I point out the noticeable bulge in the seat of her jeans. “You’re a senior in high school now, young lady,” I admonish her further, “It’s bad enough that were doing this as a freshman or a sophomore but to still be doing messes in your panties as a senior in high school is really quite shamefully.” “Yes, sir,” Winnie mumbles, nodding her head, as the tears begin to flow. “I’m sorry,” she tells me -- obviously quite ashamed of herself -- as she breaks down completely, crying into her hands.

Winnie is such a sweet and likeable girl and it’s hard to be so strict with her, but this is hardly her first offense. She’s been having these kind of accidents regularly throughout her high school career. It’s her 3rd time already this year and she also has a violation for using a faculty bathroom as well as the less serious violation for being late to class after using (for urinating) the girls’ room between classes. Winnie seems to have no problem with urinating in the girls’ room when she needs to. It’s obviously the other matter that is the issue with her.

Seeing her standing before me -- the load in the seat of her always fashionable jeans quite noticeable -- I can only shake my head. “You’re a senior now, Winnie,” I reiterate, “Don’t you think it’s about time you learned to start using the girls’ room in school?” Winnie, still in tears, claims that she does. “I think Mr. Ziffel means for your bowel movements,” Mrs. Crabtree, a member of the TVPC, chimes in, “I mean, I assume that you do use the girls’ room to urinate, but when it comes to bowel movements, it seems that you either go someplace else or do them in your pants.” But Winnie disagrees and claims that she, in fact, does bowel movements in the girls’ room on occasion. “I’m trying to do better, Ma’am,” she tells the committeewoman.

But Mrs. Crabtree remains skeptical. “If you were really trying to do better, that bowel movement would be in the toilet instead of your pants,” she tells the girl in no uncertain terms, “Three times in your pants already this year is really quite shameful and I actually think you know it.” “You know, it really isn’t rocket science, young lady,” Mrs. Crabtree lectures Winnie, “When you need to go, you head into the girls’ room, pull down you pants, and sit your butt down on the toilet seat.” Winnie quietly nods her head in agreement with that as she stares down at the floor too ashamed to even look the committeewoman in the eye. “And then you wipe yourself, pull up your pants, and flush it all away,” Mrs. Crabtree adds, “Like I said, it isn’t rocket science!” “I mean, do you like having to come here and appear before the TVPC?” she asks Winnie, “Do you actually like being punished for bathroom matters?” The shy senior beauty assures us that she doesn’t. “Well, you wouldn’t have to if you’d just go in the toilet in the girls’ room like you’re supposed to,” Mrs. Crabtree tells her. Winnie, again, just nods her head as she stands there crying, staring at the floor in shame.

“She really is trying to do better,” suddenly chimes in Kevin, a close friend and sometimes boyfriend of Winnie. “It’s not like she’s doing it on purpose,” Kevin tells us, “You really don’t know how much she hates it when she goes in her pants.” Normally, we don’t tolerate students calling out like that at meetings of the TVPC, but I know how much Kevin really loves Winnie. Two years ago, Kevin even drove Winnie home at lunchtime so she could clean up after messing in her panties and let Winnie hide her soiled panties in his car so that her parents wouldn’t find out. I know how much Kevin really wants to help Winnie, but good intentions aside, I’m not really sure he is. “Winnie doesn’t need someone to make excuses for her,” I tell him, “Winnie needs someone to tell her that when she needs a bowel movement at school, she needs to go to the girls’ room and do it.” “I assume she’s going to college next year, for pete’s sake,” I remind Kevin, “Don’t you think it’s going to be a big problem if she’s still refusing to use public bathrooms for her bowel movements.” Kevin has no answer to that, but hopefully it gives him something to think about. More importantly, I hope it gives Winnie something to think about.

Turning now to Winnie, she really has no excuse for going in her panties this afternoon -- the accident happening in 7th period French class with Mrs. Defequer. Mrs. Defequer reports that Winnie just sat there in class -- obviously needing to go -- without even asking for a pass to the girls’ room. “She just sat there in class trying to hold it in,” her French teacher reports further, “And then finally -- Inevitably -- It all came out in her panties.” “I’m not saying that she actually did it on purpose -- She was obviously quite ashamed of herself when it happened,” Mrs. Defequer continues, “But the point is that she made absolutely no attempt to go to the girls’ room when she quite obviously needed to go quite badly. The strict French teacher reminds of us her policy that each girl in her class is entitled to three girls’ room passes per month. “Winnie had all three of her passes available,” Mrs. Defequer tells us, “She obviously would have been given permission to go to the girls’ room if only she’d asked.” Questioning Winnie on why she didn’t even ask for girls’ room pass, the pretty senior brunette meekly answers “I don’t know -- I just didn’t.”

Hearing that, all I can do is shake my head. I’m really not surprised that Winnie really has no answers. Apparently, she’s just one of those girls who only seems to be comfortable having bowel movements in her own bathroom at home. Mrs. Adler, though, takes exception to Winnie’s lack of answer. “You don’t know?” she asks the girl incredulously, “You don’t know why you didn’t go to the girls’ room when you need to? -- You don’t know why you just sat there in class and messed in your panties?” But as Winnie just stands there crying, even Mrs. Adler seems to take a step back. “Well, I guess you have no excuse because there really is no excuse,” she tells the toilet-trouble senior beauty, “There really is no excuse for a girl your age that still messes in her panties like this.”

As I’ve noted this is Winnie’s 3rd panty-soiling accident of the school. But given the fact she’s a senior now (and really should know better) and given her other toilet violations -- especially using a faculty bathroom -- clearly more than the usual punishment is in order here. Mrs. Adler advocates that we be particularly severe with her. “It’s more than obvious that simply detention and writing punishment lines is not sufficient here,” the committeewoman argues, “How many times has she had to do that before and still here we are with yet another mess in her panties.” Mrs. Adler argues that Winnie be sent down the hall to the girls’ room and made to clean herself and her panties right here in school. “I know that you usually don’t give that punishment for only a third offense,“ she acknowledges, “But I certainly think that in this case it’s warranted.“ She further notes that with all the messes that Winnie‘s done in school over the years, it‘s never reached the point where she‘s actually had to clean one of them here at school. “I certainly think that with all the messes she’s done at school over the years, she deserves to experience that, Mrs. Adler argues, “She did the mess in school, let her clean the mess in school,” Mrs. Adler argues. “Maybe if she has to clean her messes here at school, she’ll realize that it’s better to simply go in the toilet when she needs to,” she adds.

I must say that she makes a good point and I tell Winnie so. “Rest assured, young lady, that you’re on the verge of having to do exactly that,” I tell her. “Next time you have to go in school, you need to seriously consider the potential consequences of going in your pants,” I warn the pretty brunette, “You could very easily find yourself cleaning your mess right here in the girls’ room.” “Rest assured, Winnie, I’m not waiting until it’s your 6th offense to assign that this year,” I warn her further. Faithful readers of the TVPC surely know that it’s typically not until a 6th offense that we assign a girl to having to clean up the mess in the girls’ room here at school. Instead, Winnie will have to write, “I will not soil my panties in school again” 500 times and serve a full week of detention sitting on the toilet. “FIVE hundred and detention ON THE TOILET?” Winnie asks -- no doubt surprised at the severity of her punishment. “Yes indeed, young lady,” I tell her in no uncertain terms. “You’re a senior now, young lady,” I reiterate, “And it really is about time these accidents of yours stopped.” Pausing a moment to let that sink in, I then remind her that we can still sentence her to clean up the accident here in the girls’ room. Winnie, definitely one of our smartest students -- decides not to push her luck.

[Arnold Ziffel]

Toilet Violations Punishment Committee

The next matter before the TVPC is a case against a very bright and studious junior redhead named Tessa. Looking over the paperwork on this case, I see that it’s a case brought by another student. Although the vast majority of our TVPC cases are brought by teachers and other staff members, cases can be brought by other students are pretty much anyone else for that matter. In this instance, we have Brenda, a pretty senior brunette, bringing this case against Tessa. Looking over the Violation Report filed by Brenda, I see that she has charged Tessa with “Reading In The Girls’ Room.” Tessa is a junior but it’s her first year here after she and her dad moved her from the big city. Though not really a discipline problem in the traditional sense, Tessa is not always easy to deal with. She’s a very bright girl but sometimes too bright for her own good. She’s a sarcastic, argumentative sort who referred to our school as SUBURGATORY (some sort of suburban purgatory) when she appeared before the TVPC a while back. But she was smart enough not to say it again when I threatened to make her write it 500 times if she did.

Getting into this case, however, I am more than a little confused. “There’s really no specific rule against reading in the girls’ room,” I note, “I’m not really sure if Tessa committed a toilet violation here,” I note, “There’s really no specific rule against reading in the girls’ room.” Naturally, I ask Brenda, oftentimes a disagreeable sort herself, about that. “Well, it has to be a violation for something, sir,” the senior beauty then tells me, “I know you’re always telling us that unless its’ to perform a bodily function, we’re not supposed to be in the girls’ room.” The point being, I assume, that Tessa was not doing that. “Well, if Tessa was hanging around in the girls’ room without a legitimate purpose, that would be a violation for loitering,” I tell her, “That much is quite clear in the rules.” “Well, it has to be something,” Brenda reiterates, “As long as Tessa gets punished for something is all that I care about.” Out of the corner of my eye, I see Tessa with raised eyebrows and exhibiting her characteristic smug condescending smile. As I noted, Tessa is sometimes too smart for her own good.

Not wanting this to turn into an argument between the two girls, I ask Brenda to just stick to the facts of the case and continue. “Like I said, Tessa was reading in the bathroom,” Brenda then explains, “And I don’t mean she just stopped to read something real quick -- I mean she was just sitting in a stall reading on the toilet.” “I mean, she was just sitting there taking up a stall reading up a book,” Brenda explains further, “She was just sitting there the whole period reading a book.” I pause for a moment -- about to ask her how she knows Tessa was there in the stall reading the whole period. But catching a quick glimpse of Tessa, I see that she doesn’t seem to be denying it. Accordingly, I then wait for Brenda to continue.

The senior beauty goes on to tell us that following her English class 6th period, she hurried to the Main Corridor Girls’ Room. “I had a quite urgent matter to take care of,” she explains, “Well, two urgent matters actually.” But when I got there, I couldn’t get into a stall right away,” Brenda continues, “The only stall that was open when I walked in was the last one by the far wall and Tessa beat me to it.” “You know, if it wasn’t bad enough that you took up a stall when you didn’t actually have to go,” Brenda turns and chastises Tessa directly, “But you took the end stall where most girls like to go to do #2.” Brenda then explains that not being able to get into a stall right away pretty much made it impossible for her to then take care of her business between classes like she’d planned. “Maybe I still could have taken a quick pee -- Maybe if I just did it quickly and didn’t take the time to wipe myself afterwards,” she speculates, “But not with doing what I had to do and you certainly can’t go without wiping yourself when you do that.” “So thanks to her taking up a stall like she did, all I could do was just go to French class next period,” the senior brunette tells us, “I didn’t get a chance to actually use the toilet between classes like I’d planned.” “I just didn’t have enough to time to,” she adds.

She further explains that she then had to get a pass from her French teacher to go to the girls’ room during class. That was apparently something that she really didn’t want to do. She tells us -- looking angrily at Tessa in the process -- that Mrs. Defequer only allows a girl 3 girls’ room passes per month in her class. “Once you use those 3 you don’t get to go to the girls’ room no matter how bad you need to go,” she says, directing the comment in Tessa’s direction. The point being, of course, is that in Mrs. Defequer’s class, you don’t use those girls’ room passes lightly and that if it weren’t for Tessa taking up a stall just to read, she could have gone between classes and wouldn’t have had to use one of those passes today. “It would have been one thing if Tessa really did actually have to use the bathroom,” Brenda acknowledges, “If it was because she was using the girls’ room between classes, too, then that would have been something else.” “I mean, she has a right to use the girls’ room for legitimate reasons, too,” Brenda argues, “But there’s no reason for her to be taking a stall if she didn’t really have to go -- I don’t think that’s really a legitimate reason to be taking up a stall like she did.”

“I’d say reading is a legitimate reason,” Tessa then chimes in smugly smiling, “In fact, some would say that reading is fundamental.” She no doubt thinks herself quite clever but I am certainly not amused. “This isn’t about reading, young lady,” I admonish her, “And I’m reasonably certain that you know that.” Tessa nods her head that she understands that but still says that Brenda is being a bit overdramatic about the whole thing. “I was reading,” the articulate junior beauty reminds us, “I wasn’t smoking or doing drugs or even doing vandalism -- I was reading.” “I’m not going to apologize for liking to read on lunch period,” Tessa argues, “And it’s a lot quieter in there than in the cafeteria.” “I was reading, for pete’s sake,” she reiterates, “It wasn’t like I was smoking or drinking or doing drugs or anything bad at all.” “But you weren’t using the toilet, either,” I quickly counter as Brenda nods her head. “Girls’ room stalls are there for girls to take care of their bathroom business,” I admonish Tessa, “They’re not there for you to read or do anything else that can easily be done elsewhere.”

“You know, some girls have been known to use the LIBRARY for reading,” Mrs. Karbopple, a TVPC member, suggests, “I would think the chairs we have in the library would be more comfortable than sitting on the toilet.” “Yes, ma’am,” Tessa tells her, “But it’s a lot quieter in the bathroom.” “Once the bell rings and the crowd clears out, it’s actually quite quiet and peaceful in there.” But I’m left just shaking my head. “We have a lot of girls at this school and we need our toilets available for girls who actually need to use them,” I tell this articulate junior redhead, “When a girl is prevented from using the toilet because another girl is taking up a stall for something else, that’s a problem.” “I hope you wouldn’t go to the bathroom in the library,” I tell Tessa, “Likewise, you shouldn’t be reading in the girls’ room.”

Hearing that, Tessa just rolls her eyes at me. “It’s hardly the same thing,” she argues, “Lots of people read in the bathroom.” Needless to say, I’m not pleased with that attitude. “People do sometimes read in the bathroom -- They read as they go about their BATHROOM BUSINESS!” I angrily lecture her, “But they don’t treat the bathroom as a library -- They don’t occupy a stall for no valid reason and prevent another girl from using the toilet.” “You know, this isn’t really a serious offense, young lady,” I explain, “The only way you’re going to get a serious punishment for this is if you convince me that you’re not talking this seriously.” “Trust me, Tessa, when I tell you that it’s in your best interests to understand that the girls’ room is not a library,” I warn the smart and articulate beauty, “Trust me when I tell you that the best thing you can do right now is tell me that you get it and that you won’t do it again.” Thinking a moment, Tessa then tells me that she gets it and that she won’t do it again. “I’ll read in the library next time,” she assures me. “Good idea,” I tell her.

Tessa’s only got 1 prior toilet violations and that’s for being late to class for bathroom purposes. As noted, this is not a serious offense and Tessa’s attitude -- though smug and a bit condescending -- isn’t overtly disrespectful. For punishment, she’ll have to serve two hours of detention and write, “I will not read in the girls’ room in school again” 200 times. I’m tempted to have her serve her detention sitting on the toilet -- without reading material, of course -- but that doesn’t quite seem necessary in this case. “Yes, sir,” is all Tessa says at getting her punishment. She no doubt has more she’d like to say but she’s obviously smart enough to know better.

A rarity on any TVPC agenda is a punishment appeal case. As faithful readers of the TVPC surely know, a girl does have the right to re-appear before the TVPC and ask us to review her case. The goal of an appeal, of course, is the hope that the TVPC will reduce her punishment. It is often that the TVPC will grant a girl an appeal and reduce her punishment, so you can understand why punishment appeal cases are so rare. Occasionally, though, punishment appeals do happen and given the right circumstances, the TVPC will sometimes grant the girl the punishment reduction she seeks. Rarer still is a situation like today where we have not 1 but 2 punishment appeal cases to hear.

As is the case with most punishment appeals, the first one deals with a girl on toilet suspension.

Skyler, a skinny senior brunette is on toilet suspension – A month-long toilet suspension on a for smoking in the Basement girls’ room. As she takes the podium to present her appeal case, the effects of her toilet suspension are evident. The crotch of her jeans is already noticeably wet and she’s noticeably squirming in obvious discomfort of still having to urinate quite badly. Furthermore, the back of her jeans shows a noticeable somewhat flattened bulge and a bit of dark discoloration in the seat. It’s in her panties under those jeans, of course, that Skyler is carrying her most recent bowel movement. Such is the circumstance of a girl on toilet suspension – A girl without the privilege of using the toilet in school.

“Please sir – I just can’t take it anymore,” the pretty senior pleads, “I’ve just got to get my toilet privileges back.” “You’ll take it for as long as you have to take it,” I tell her, “You’ve only served 2 weeks on your toilet suspension so far and you’ve still got 2 ½ weeks to go.” “Yes sir – I really didn’t mean it like that,” she tells me apologetically, “I know that I’m not allowed to use the toilet in school again until you say so and I know I’m just going to have to deal with that.” “But I’m just begging you, sir – Please let me have my toilet privileges back,” she pleads, “Please don’t make me keep going in my pants for another 2 ½ weeks.” “Sir, this has just been the worst – I just can’t stand not being allowed to use the toilet,” she tells me, “I mean, I know I’m going to have to keep doing it if you say so, but please sir, don’t make me keep going in my pants – It’s just so disgusting.” “Please sir – That’s just been the absolute worst,” she tells me, “I just can’t stand going in my pants all the time like I’ve had to.”

“Well, that’s what happens when you’re on toilet suspension, young lady,” I point out to her, “You oftentimes have to go in your pants and I’d imagine it’s not very pleasant and that it’s quite disgusting.” “I suppose that’s one reason why most girls don’t smoke in the girls’ room,” I tell her, “They don’t want to get put on toilet suspension and have to go through all that.” “But I guess you had to learn the hard way, young lady,” I lecture her, “I guess you REALLY had to learn the hard way.” “And it wasn’t like this was your first offense, either,” I remind the senior, “You don’t get a whole month on toilet suspension for a first offense.” I remind her that this was, in fact, a 2nd offense for smoking in the girls’ room and I had spared her a toilet suspension for her 1st offense. “You promised me then that it wouldn’t happen again,” I remind her, “But it was less than a week later that you were before the TVPC charged with smoking in the girls’ room again.” “You hadn’t even finished serving your detention for the 1st offense and you had only handing in your writing assignment that morning,” I further point out, “And there you were smoking in the girls’ room again.” “Maybe I should have given you a week or two on toilet suspension the first time,” I suggest, “And then maybe you would have learned your lesson then and wouldn’t be serving a whole month of it now.”

“I think you’re right, sir,” Skyler humbly suggests to me, “I hate to say it, sir, but I really do think it took the toilet suspension to teach me a lesson.” “If I had been on toilet suspension before, I definitely would not have smoked in the girls’ room again,” she tells me, “It just isn’t worth it, sir – It just isn’t worth having to go to the bathroom in your pants in school.” “Detentions and punishment lines are one thing, sir,” Skyler explains, “They’re really a pain but it’s not like being on toilet suspension.” “Nothing is like being on toilet suspension,” she explains further, “Nothing is worse than not being able to use the toilet when you need to.”

“But I’m here today, sir, because I have learned my lesson,” she then tells me, “I’ve been on toilet suspension for 2 weeks now and I already know that I never want to go on toilet suspension again.” “I’ll never do ANYTHING to risk going on toilet suspension again,” she promises. As she tells me about her time on toilet suspension, she tells me that she’s wet her pants everyday and most days more than once. “I’m just not very good at holding it in, sir – I’ve never been,” she reports. “I’m not like a lot of girls who hold it in at school a lot,” she says, “I’ve always just gone to the girls’ room when I needed to – I just don’t have much experience trying to hold it in when I have to go.” “Well, if wet pants – Even REALLY wet pants – Are the worst you’ve had to deal with on toilet suspension, you should consider yourself lucky,” I tell her. But Skyler tells me it hasn’t only been that. She turns around to show me the well-flattened bulge and the dark discoloration in the seat of her jeans. “I’ve had to mess in my panties on toilet suspension, too, sir,” she tells me, this time breaking down in tears, “I’m not any good at holding that in, either.” “This is the 7th time this has happened in these last 2 weeks, sir,” she tells me further, as the tears flow, “And this is just awful – This is just the worst.” “I’m also used to pooping in school when I need to,” Skyler continues, “And I just can’t hold that in when I have to go, either.”

With that I see her grimace and then I see the crotch of her already wet jeans get even wetter. The poor girl just stands there in tears, uncontrollably wetting her pants some more. Pausing for a moment to let her aching bladder run its course, she then gathers up her composure and makes one final plea to get her toilet privileges back early. “Please sir, I know I really did deserve to get put on toilet suspension 2 weeks ago,” she pleads, “But now, 2 weeks later and having gone through 2 weeks of hell, I know that I’ve learned my lesson.” “Please, sir – Please let me have my toilet privileges back now,” she pleads, “I promise you that I’m not even going to think about smoking in the girls’ room again.” “Please sir – I’ll do an alternative punishment if you need me to,” she begs some more, “But please just let me start using the toilet in school again.”

Though I’m obviously very tough in these appeals cases, I think Skyler makes a good case for herself. Most girls on toilet suspension don’t find the wetting so bad but it’s the bowel movements in her pants that really make the impression. And with Skyler apparently having done 7 bowel movement in her pants already in just 2 weeks, she’s already suffered more than most. That’s probably more in 2 weeks than most girls suffer through in an entire month. I also note that I did give her the maximum toilet suspension permitted under the rules for a 2nd offense of smoking in the girls’ room. That was because her 2nd offense came so soon after her 1st offense and I thought that needed the sternest lesson permissible. And apparently she seems to have learned her lesson now.

I feel inclined to grant her appeal but letting her have her toilet privileges back after serving only 2 weeks of her 1 month sentence, seems a bit too lenient. “Well, Skyler, you’ve made a very compelling case for leniency for yourself,” I tell her sympathetically, “But 2 weeks is only the MINIMUM toilet suspension for what you did and I’m not willing to let you off that easy.” “But I’ll tell you what I will do, young lady,” I then explain and note for the record, “I’ll reduce your toilet suspension from 1 month to 3 weeks.” “So now you’ll have just 1 week remaining on your toilet suspension,” I explain further, “And after next week I can let you start using the girls’ rooms again.” “I’m sorry that’s not quite giving you back your toilet privileges immediately,” I reason, “But I am giving you a bit of a break from your original punishment.” I can tell that she’s still quite disappointed and upset at facing another week on toilet suspension, but she does thank me for the reduction she did get. But in reducing her down to only 1 more week, I also warn her not to do anything stupid with regard to using the toilet. “Get caught using the girls’ room in violation of your toilet suspension now and I can guarantee you the maximum punishment for that,” I warn her, “And there will certainly be no appeal granted on that.” “Somehow I’ll get through the next week – I’ll just have to like you said,” the pretty senior brunette tells me determinedly, “I’ll just keep telling myself that it’s only 1 week that I’ve got left.”

Of course, she will now have to do an alternative punishment in lieu of her time on toilet suspension, and I’m sure not going to make that pleasant for her. She got 2 days left of detention to serve for her smoking. But I’m going to add another week of detention to that and unfortunately for Skyler, it’s not going to be like regular detention. Instead, she’s going to spend that week in detention standing in the corner facing the wall. And she’ll also have to wear a sign on her back that says “Smoking In The Girls’ Room.” “I want the other girls to see your wet and messy pants as you stand there,” I then explain to her and the assembled crowd in the committee room, “And I want them to think about how that could happen to them if they smoke in the girls’ room.” Skyler is understandably horrified at the embarrassment that will surely come from that. But she’ll take that any day over the embarrassment of serving her full month on toilet suspension.

[Arnold Ziffel]

Toilet Violations Punishment Committee

Quinn, a sophomore brunette is also on toilet suspension -- a point underscored by the obvious wetness trailing from the crotch of her jeans and the quite noticeable bulge visible in the seat. Such was her punishment not only for using a faculty bathroom -- specifically, the faculty bathroom in the librarian’s office -- but severely clogging it in the process. Quinn had previously soiled her panties in History class and then snuck into the faculty bathroom in an attempt to clean herself up and change into clean panties. She did have the good sense not to ditch the soiled panties in the bathroom or, worse yet, attempt to flush them down the toilet -- she apparently stashed them in her purse and later hid them in her locker before taking them home -- but she did end up clogging the toilet with the sheer volume of toilet paper she used in the process. Not having a washcloth or anything like that, Quinn, of course, needed quite a quantity of toilet paper to wipe herself of the smeared mess. And, unfortunately, she got a bit careless in trying to flush too much toilet paper at once. Her older sister DARIA is here in the committee room not so much for moral support but serving detention for a toilet violation of her own -- specifically for making sarcastic remarks to Miss Norberry during a panty-inspection.

But as I look over Quinn’s punishment appeal, I see that it isn’t actually the toilet suspension that she’s appealing. Today, in fact, is the last day of her two weeks on toilet suspension for that. This leaves me puzzled and I, of course, ask her about that. “Yes, sir, it’s my last day, thankfully!” she tells me, smiling, “Thankfully, this is the last of having to go in my pants.” “I never thought I’d be so looking forward to using the girls’ room here at school,” she adds, “Having to use them doesn’t seem all that bad when the alternative is having to go in my pants instead.” And that brings us to the subject of the pretty brunette’s punishment appeal this afternoon. In addition to the two weeks on toilet suspension, Quinn was also given several repetitive writing assignments and both regular detention and detention cleaning bathrooms. These were punishments not only for using the faculty bathroom and clogging the toilet there, but for soiling her panties in the first place. Her writing punishments were dutifully completed in short order, but both her detention punishments are another matter.

“As I recall, we let you postpone serving your detention,” I remind her, “We let you postpone serving these so at least you wouldn’t have a longer school day while you were on toilet suspension and couldn’t use the bathroom in school.” “Yes, sir -- thank you for that, sir,” she tells me, “I mean, I still did have plenty of accidents both ways in my pants, but at least I didn’t have to stay in it an hour longer each day.” “But now that your toilet suspension is ending, you now have to serve those detentions,” I remind her and note for the record, “That’s two days of regular detention for the panty-soiling and one week of bathroom cleaning detention for clogging the toilet.”

“Yes, sir -- that’s what I wanted to talk to you about, sir,” she tells me. She then explains that she’s appealing her 5 days of bathroom cleaning detention. Specifically, she’s appealing that those be changed to 5 days of regular detention instead. “I know I was wrong for using the faculty bathroom like I did and I have to be punished for that,” she argues, “But I really don’t think I should have to do bathroom cleaning detention for that.” “Aren’t you only supposed to get bathroom cleaning punishment if you make a mess in the bathroom or something like that?” Quinn asks, “Isn’t it only supposed to be regular detention unless you do that?” With that, though, I just look at her puzzled. “You clogged the toilet, young lady,” I remind her, “You clogged the toilet quite severely with a massive amount of toilet paper.” “And that was a bathroom you shouldn’t have even been using in the first place,” I further remind her, “Because of you, that toilet was out of commission for a good portion of the day and several of our teachers had to go across the hall and use the girls’ room instead.”

“Yes, sir -- I’m sorry about that, sir,” she tells me. “And I know that I need to be punished for that,” she reiterates. “But I just don’t think that should warrant bathroom cleaning detention,” she argues, “I just think that should be regular detention instead.” She claims that what she did shouldn’t be considered as messing up the bathroom. “I mean, I know I clogged the toilet,” she acknowledges, “But it’s not like the toilet overflowed or anything like that.” “I mean, what I did was completely confined to the toilet,” she argues further, “I know it was a lot of toilet paper and all, but nothing spilled out onto the floor or anything like that.” “As I said, sir, I know I deserve to be punished -- I know I’m going to have to serve detention for that I did,” she says again, “But I just think it should be regular detention instead of having to clean the bathrooms.”

Hearing Quinn’s request, it would seem that she’s get her facts correct, but her argument is dubious at best. Clogging the toilet -- especially clogging it as severely as she did -- most certainly does qualify as making a mess in the bathroom and I tell her so. “Look, Quinn -- I know we’ve had messes in the bathroom a whole lot worse than what you did,” I explain, “But even without overflowing, a clogged toilet certainly does qualify and making a mess in the bathroom.” “And I’m afraid, that does mean that bathroom cleaning punishment is quite appropriate,” I tell her. The pretty and usually quite cheerful sophomore lets out an audible groan at hearing that. She’s not smartest girl around but she obviously can tell where this appeal is heading. “I know you didn’t do it on purpose,” I tell her sympathetically, “But you did, in fact, clog the toilet and that did indeed make a bit of mess in the bathroom.” “And it was in a bathroom you shouldn’t even have been suing in the first place,” Mrs. Adler then chimes in -- in a far less sympathetic tone than mine. “I still don‘t know what possessed you to try to flush all that toilet paper at once,” the committeewoman tells the sophomore beauty, “You’d think at your age you would have had enough experience using the toilet to know that you can’t flush so much toilet paper at once.”

“I don’t have a lot of experience cleaning up messes in my panties,” Quinn then offers. “I guess I was just in such a hurry to wipe myself and get cleaned up that I just panicked,” she reasons, “It’s hard cleaning yourself from a mess without even a washcloth and I guess I just wasn’t thinking.” “At least I didn’t try to flush my panties down the toilet,” she then points out, “I think it would be a whole lot worse of a clog if I had done that.” “Yes and had you done that you’re punishment would have been a whole lot worse as well,” I explain to her, “That would have been a whole month of bathroom cleaning detention, not to mention at least 2 months on toilet suspension.” The girl nods her head seemingly in acknowledgement and acceptance that her punishment could have been a whole lot worse. “Just be happy your toilet suspension is over now,” I suggest, “Or rather, it’ll be over first thing when you walk into school tomorrow.” “You can’t use the girls’ room quite yet,” I remind her, “Stop by the TVPC office first thing tomorrow and someone will cut off your wristband.” The red wristband, of course, signifies that a girl is on toilet suspension.

But getting back to the issue at hand, the TVPC votes 5-0 to deny her punishment appeal. “We postponed the detention until after you were finished with your toilet suspension,” I then remind her, “And I’m afraid that’s the only break you’re going to get on this. In keeping with standard TVPC procedures or serving the more onerous detentions first, Quinn will first serve her week of bathroom cleaning detention and then serve the 2 days of regular detention that she got for the panty-soiling accident that started this whole thing. “Your specific bathroom cleaning assignment will be posted on the TVPC bulletin board by the end of the school day Monday,” I remind Quinn. Looking over at her sister, I see DARIA smiling a bit. The two of them are quite different and don’t really seem to get along that well. No doubt she’s got something she’d like to say to Quinn at this point, but she’s smart enough to save it for now.

So concludes another session of the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee. Meeting adjourned at 4:01 PM.

[spandexman]

Thank you Arnold

Whenever I read your reports wish I could go to this high school. Seeing all of these pretty teenagers with loads in their underwear and of course Miss Musso in spandex. Thank you for the many reports. I remember first reading a report in the old Letters magazine. ..