Toilet Violations Punishment Committee

[Arnold Ziffel]

Welcome to a session of the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee (TVPC) – this writer’s favorite fantasy. The story takes place in a high school not unlike other high schools. In this high school, however, there are strict rules regarding the toileting behavior of the school’s female students. Those who break the school toilet rules (including the rules against going to the bathroom in your pants) are brought before the TVPC to have their cases heard and their punishment given out if they are guilty. Meetings of the TVPC are called to order at 3:10 PM each school day in the TVPC meeting room – Room 222 of the high school. It should be noted that where this story takes place you need to be 18 in order to enter high school so all persons depicted, even though entirely fictional, are at least 18 years of age.

My name is Arnold Ziffel and I’m chairman of the TVPC. What follows are the summary minutes of the TVPC meeting of April 28, 2011

As I gavel to order, this afternoon’s session of the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee (TVPC), I am handed a note from the TVPC Clerk. It seems that one of the girls scheduled for TVCP detention this afternoon – specifically Tonya, a well-toned blonde-haired beauty, is absent. She is supposed to be here today serving the last day of a week long detention for fighting in the girls’ room. Just this morning, she handed in the 500 sentences that she had to write for that toilet violation as well.

But just as I’m about to officially record here as absent (and schedule her for the TVPC session tomorrow to explain why), the pretty and outgoing junior comes strolling in. She presents me with an excuse note from the Principal. The note explains that Tonya has just come from the Principal’s office where she was undoubtedly punished yet again for another offense. That being the case, I officially record her as “present” for detention and motion for her to take a seat in the back of the room to serve that detention. “You know the procedure,” I tell her. Tonya does indeed know the procedure as she is no stranger to serving detention -- Occasionally with us for toilet-related offenses, but even more so with the Principal for other things not-toilet related. As for the TVPC, she doesn’t go in her pants much, but her jealous streak and her problems controlling her temper often get the better of her. Her recent fight in the girls’ room was a result of those jealousy and anger issues. In addition to being a very pretty girl with a well-toned, athletic figure Tonya has many talents but is a serious underachiever in school. Perhaps she thinks she can get by on her FIGURE – SKATING her way through high school based on that.

Before sitting down to detention, Tonya takes the occasion to kick her chair. That, of course, draws my ire. “Is there a problem, young lady?” I ask her. “Yes, there is a problem,” she tells me, “I’m having a really bad day that’s the problem.” “I just handed in that 500 times assignment this morning – you know, the one that I had to write for the fight in the girls’ room,” she continues, “The one that I was up half the night last night trying to finish.” “And now I just got another 500 times assignment to write from the Principal,” Tonya adds, as she finally and properly plops her shapely behind into her chair. She goes on to explain that she just got this 500 times for cutting her 6th period class this afternoon. Why she decided to cut 6th period or what she was doing during 6th period when she cut, she doesn’t seem to explain at all.

“Unless you want yet another 500 times to write, I better not have any more outbursts from you,” I warn her, “Just sit quietly and work on the assignment that you do have and we won’t have any problems.” “Yes, sir,” she tells me, “The last thing I need is another 500 times punishment with FIGURE SKATING practice all this week and a big FIGURE SKATING competition coming up next week.”

Today’s TVPC session begins with a visit from Miss Cooke, the school’s softball coach. She regrets to inform us of toilet violations by two of her players on the bus after yesterday’s game at WINSLOW HS. Toilet violations by softball players at games (or by others representing the school) are not only punishable by the TVPC but are punished more severely than toilet violations occurring in school. This is especially true of accident violations which not only are a disgrace to the girl having the accident, but a disgrace to her team and our whole school. Fortunately for them, they are not accused of having accidents but “Causing the Bus to Stop for a Bathroom Break.” The two players accused are Danielle, a pretty and popular senior brunette and Elaine (Lanie), a short but very cute sophomore blonde.

“They could very easily have had accidents,” the coach points out, “If I hadn’t allowed the pit stop that they needed, they would surely be facing accident charges now.” “Obviously these two girls had to go at the game but didn’t want to use the port-o-potty that was there,” Coach Cooke tells us, “Then once we were on the road Danielle was begging to stop somewhere so she wouldn’t have an accident.” “She was obviously desperate so I had the bus pull into a McDonalds,” she explains further, “And she, along with Lanie, ran for the ladies’ room.” Danielle, the senior, has pleaded “Guilty” to the offense but Lanie, the sophomore, has pleaded “Not Guilty.”

I start with the senior and ask her to explain what happened. “I’m so lucky that Coach Cooke allowed us to stop,” the senior admits, “She’s right that I was desperate and I really would have done a major mess in my panties if I didn’t get to a toilet right then.” “It was my own fault for not going at the game and it would have been my own fault if I had done a mess in my panties on the bus,” she confesses, “She was so nice to let us stop so that wouldn’t happen to me.” “You know I used to go in my pants a lot when I was a freshman and even as a sophomore,” she reminds us. “But then I learned that I shouldn’t be doing that anymore and that if I wanted to be on the softball team that I had to do my BMs in the toilet at school sometimes even if I didn’t want to,” she reminds us, “The last thing I wanted was to be doing that again and disgracing myself and my whole team again. The pretty and well-spoken senior was a regular before the TVPC during her freshman year and into her sophomore year with a steady stream of messing accidents. But she has cleaned up her act considerably without an accident since. I’m very impressed with the improvement she has made and the maturity she has shown today in facing up to her toilet violation and I tell her so. “It wasn’t very mature of me not to go at the game when I had the chance,” she responds, “I do really hate to do BMs in port-o-potties but that’s no excuse – when you have to go, you have to go and I really had to go.

Now, turning my attention to the sophomore, I am puzzled by her “Not Guilty” plea. Of course, she admits going to the ladies’ room at McDonalds but she insists that she didn’t have an emergency. “I never asked Coach Cooke to stop the bus,” she claims, “I did have to urinate but it wasn’t that bad – I only went because the bus was already stopped.” “You didn’t have to go bad?” the coach questions her, “I was outside the bathroom door and I could still hear your stream hitting the water.” “I’ve never heard someone go that long and that loudly in my entire life,” the coach continues, “And you’re trying to tell me that it wasn’t an emergency? – You’re trying to tell me that you weren’t on the verge of wetting your pants?” “No! I wasn’t going to wet my pants,” the sophomore argues, “I’m not saying that I didn’t have to go but you didn’t have to stop the bus for me – only for Danielle.” “Come on, Lanie, you know you had to go really bad,” Danielle chimes in like an older sister, “You were asking me to hurry up while I was on the toilet – that’s how bad you had to go.” “You needed to go almost as much as I did,” the senior explains to the sophomore, “I think you need to step up now and take responsibility for what you did.”

“I know I had to go and I know I had to go a lot,” the younger girl argues, becoming more desperate in sticking to her story, “But I really only went because the bus was already stopped – I really would have made it back without an accident if we didn’t stop.” “I have a really big bladder,” she adds, “That’s why I went a lot and it seemed like an emergency when it really wasn’t.” “Big bladder?” I question her, “If you have such a big bladder how do you explain the 6 wetting accidents you had last year.” “That was only because I never used to urinate in the girls’ room at all,” she says, “I used to just try to hold it in all day until I got home.” “That just tells me that you’re very irresponsible about your need to urinate,” I tell her, “Just like your not taking responsibility for what you did yesterday.

Obviously, I find her “Guilty” and I note that for the record. In determining their punishment, I have to consider what would have happened had the coach not allowed them to stop the bus. Danielle was quite right that the Coach was very nice to allow the pit stop. Most of our coaches would not have done so, thus allowing the two girls to reap the full consequences of their foolish decisions not to use the potty-o-potty back at WINSLOW HS before getting on the bus to come back. For a panty-soiling offense and a panty-wetting offense – both while representing the school – they each would have gotten a serious writing assignment and a stern dose of detention – possibly detention time sitting on the toilet.

Instead I sentence them each to write a 1,000 word letter of thanks to their coach for sparing them accidents and worse consequences from the TVPC. They’ll each read their essay to the coach in front of the whole team. I give Danielle 3 days detention and Lanie 2 days detention – the messing accident that Danielle almost had being more serious than the wetting accident that Lanie almost had. But I also sentence the unapologetic sophomore to write 100 times, “I must learn to take responsibility for my toilet violations.” Both girls will also be required to make a mandatory toilet visit before getting on the bus before and after every softball game for the remainder of the season.

I’m more than a little surprised to note that our next accused toilet offender is Felicity, a gorgeous, well-built senior with long and beautiful blonde hair. The poor girl is crying as she stands before me in soiled panties – pleading “Guilty” to soiling her panties for the second time this month. Overall, this would be the third panty-soiling offense of the school year for the very lovely senior. This is all quite odd in that the usually quite mature and responsible Felicity only had 2 prior accidents in her entire high school career (1 soiling and 1 wetting way back when she was a freshman) and now, as a senior, she has 3 soiling accidents with 2 very recent. The usually mature and studious Felicity seems to have changed a lot as of lot. Where her studies had always seem to be her biggest concern, she has suddenly become boy-crazy and the lack of attention to her studies has begun affecting her grades. And while she has been paying less attention to her schoolwork, it also seems that she’s paying less attention to her bathroom needs as well. Her recent accidents are all part of this pattern where she seems to be too busy flirting with the boys to even get to the girls’ room in time.

Still it’s not really that bad a toilet record (especially since these 3 soiling accidents are her only toilet offenses this year) and the mess in her panties doesn’t seem all that bad. I understand that accidents can be upsetting, especially to a girl who doesn’t have them that often, but Felicity’s crying seems to make it a lot worse than it really is. “It was an accident – I was just an accident,” she cries, “I didn’t do it on purpose – It was just an accident.” “Nobody is saying that you did it on purpose, Felicity,” I tell her, trying to clam her down a bit, “We realize that it was only an accident – You don’t have to be so upset about it.” “I can’t believe that I went in my panties again,” she says through her tears, “I can’t believe how much trouble I’m going to be in this time.” “The punishment does get worse the more times you do it,” I tell her, “But you really haven’t done this a lot and I doubt the punishment is going to be as bad as you think.” “I know you’re upset, but 3 times in your panties isn’t all THAT bad,” I remind her, “A lot of girls have done a lot worse than that.”

“No, it’s not that,” Felicity responds, “It’s not my punishment here that I’m worried about.” “It’s my dad – He’s really strict,” she says, “I’m really going to be in trouble with him for this.” “I know that here I’m probably going to get detention and lines to write and it’s not like I don’t hate that, too,” she explains, “But that’s nothing compared to the punishment that I’m going to get at home.” “I’m still grounded for the last time that I messed in my panties – I got grounded a whole month for that,” Felicity explains further, “I can’t even begin to describe how mad my dad’s going to be this time – I can’t even begin to tell you how bad he’s going to punish me for it this time.” “I’m in trouble for my grades slipping, too,” she rambles on, “But that’s nothing compared to what my dad thinks of me having accidents like this.” “He says that there’s no excuse for messing in my panties at my age – he says that there is no excuse for not going to the girls’ room when I need to,” she adds.

I thought that the TVPC was pretty tough with girls having accidents, but apparently we’ve got nothing on Felicity’s father. While certainly nothing to be proud of, 3 panty soiling violations aren’t the end of the world. I could see a parent adding a little punishment at home, but it hardly seem worth what Felicity is anticipating. Obviously, though, the TVPC cannot concern itself with that. Though we can feel sorry for her getting such harsh punishment at home, we really do have to wonder how she could be so careless in not getting herself to the toilet in time. This isn’t a particularly bad accident – it looks like she at least made it in time to do some of it in the toilet – but it’s still plenty enough in her panties to be called an accident. And it’s still quite shameful for a girl her age to have any of her bowel movement in her panties at all. “You know, Felicity, there is one sure way to avoid getting in trouble from your dad for messing in your panties,” I point out to her, “And that is to use the toilet when you need to and NOT MESS IN YOUR PANTIES.” Felicity nods her head in agreement – her beautiful long blonde hair wet with tears and covering her face – and no doubt wondering how could she let this happen again.

Felicity gets the typical punishment for the TVPC for a 3rd panty-soiling violation. She’ll have to write 300 times, “I will not soil my panties in school again” and to serve 3 days in detention. But what she’ll get from her father when she gets home remains to be seen.

[Arnold Ziffel]

Toilet Violations Punishment Committee

Our next case is quite a serious matter and it is quite a surprise to see that the accused is Nancy, a tall, slender brunette. So far, she seems to be SKATING through the school year without a single toilet violation of any kind. But today, she is accused not only of soiling her panties but of hiding them behind the toilet in the Science Wing girls ‘room. The latter being a very serious offense requiring a minimum of 1 month on toilet suspension. Nancy, however, has pleaded “Not Guilty” not only to hiding the soiled panties but to having soiled them in the first place.

“I didn’t do it,” she says emphatically. “I haven’t messed in my panties since junior high and even if I did I wouldn’t be stupid enough to try to hide them in the girls’ room,” she tells us, “The soiling would only be my first offense and I’d only get a warning.” “Why would I risk a toilet suspension to hide them?” she asks. “I found the panties hidden behind a toilet in the Science Wing girls’ room and they had Nancy’s name stitched in them,” explains Miss Robinson, a young and pretty Science teacher, “I don’t know what else I’m supposed to think.” “I also figured that somebody put the panties there during 6th period,” she tells us, “And 6th period is when Nancy has lunch and would be able to take the time necessary to clean herself up and hide the panties without being noticed as absent from class.” She goes on to explain that she heard a commotion coming from that bathroom between 6th and 7th periods this afternoon. “I went in there to investigate and a bunch of girls were crowded in a stall giggling at something,” she tells us, “I went to check it out and I saw that a pair of panties was hidden there behind the toilet.” “And when I retrieved them, I saw that they had Nancy’s name stitched in them,” she adds.

“I just didn’t do it,” Nancy repeats, even more emphatically than the first time, “Why! – Why! – Why! Don’t you believe me?” Name then presents Nancy with a plastic bag containing the aforementioned soiled panties. They are baby blue bikini briefs with a FIGURE SKATER in the front and a huge mass of fecal matter in the back. Nancy breaks down and cries when she sees them. “Lying only makes it worse, Nancy,” I tell her, “You’re in enough trouble already without lying to the TVPC.”

“Yes, those are my panties,” she admits, “But I didn’t mess in them and I didn’t put them behind the toilet.” “I don’t know how they got there, but it wasn’t me,” she claims, shaking her head, “Somebody else must have done it – Somebody must be trying to get me in trouble.” As she continues to deny that she’s done anything, the athletic junior beauty suddenly has a revelation. “A few days ago, somebody stole a pair of panties out of my gym locker,” she tells us, “I went back to my locker after gym class that day and I didn’t have any clean panties to change into.” Upon questioning, she does claim to have reported this to her gym teacher. Trying to give her the benefit of the doubt, I then send for Miss Collins (her gym teacher) to confirm this. In the meantime, I ask her if she has any idea who might try to do this to her. “Everyone likes me,” she says, “I don’t know who’d want to get me in trouble.” “I don’t know who would want to get me placed on toilet suspension when I have this big FIGURE SKATING competition coming up,” she says.

When Miss Collins arrives, she confirms Nancy’s story about the missing panties. “Of course, I have no way of knowing if these particular panties are the ones that Nancy had stolen,” she tells us, “But Nancy did report to me last Friday that she had a pair of panties stolen out of her gym locker.” “You don’t really even know if she actually had panties stolen, do you, Miss Collins,” asks Mrs. Karbopple, a member of the TVPC, “The only thing that you really know is that Nancy told you that her panties were stolen.” “I guess that’s true,” Miss Collins agrees, nodding her head.

This case obviously presents a dilemma for the TVPC. I think we all really want to believe Nancy – after all, it’s hard to imagine a girl so wholesome and sweat depositing such a foul load into those panties – but we still have no plausible explanation as to how those panties (which are confirmed to be Nancy’s panties) got soiled and then got placed behind a toilet in the Science Wing girls’ room. No plausible explanation that is, except the most obvious one – that is, Nancy did indeed have a mess in them and then (probably in a state of panic) hid the panties behind the toilet herself.

“Is there anything else that you want to say in your defense, Nancy?” I ask her, still not wanting to believe that she did this, “Is there anything else you can offer to show us that this wasn’t your doing?” Nancy stands there for a moment with a growing look of dread and desperation in her eyes and then gets a look on her very pretty face as if she’s summoning up the courage to tell us something. “What is it, Nancy?” I ask her. “Well sir – I really didn’t want to tell you this, sir,” she tells us. “This is kind of embarrassing, but I guess I have to tell it,” she explains, “But I guess it’s not as embarrassing as you all thinking that I messed in my panties instead.” “I really didn’t mess in my panties,” she adds.

She goes on to point out that she did do a bowel movement in school today but she did it in the toilet like she was supposed. Specifically, she tells us that she did it in the Main Corridor girl’s room right before going to lunch 6th period. “Umm! – You know that toilet in there that got clogged today,” she points out with an embarrassed look on her face, “That was me” “I didn’t mean to clog it – it was just my umm – stuff and my toilet paper,” she is quick to point out, “But it really was me that clogged it.” “Those panties are obviously loaded really bad and my stuff in that toilet was enough to actually clog the toilet,” she says, obviously embarrassed, “I certainly couldn’t do all that in the toilet and then still do all that in those panties.” Checking with our ace restroom monitor Mrs. Johns, we confirm that there was indeed a clogged toilet in the Main Corridor girls’ room this afternoon. “Category #2 Clog – Toilet paper & Fecal matter,” Mrs. Johns is quick to point out.

After careful consideration, the TVPC finds Nancy “Not Guilty” on each or her original charges. “You’ll have to be punished for clogging the toilet and you really should have admitted to that a lot sooner than you did,” I tell her, “But with that new evidence we certainly cannot conclude that it was you who messed in those panties.” “And not having soiled your panties you would, of course, have no reason to hide your soiled panties behind the toilet.”

“You’ll serve 2 days in detention and you’ll have to write, “I will not clog the toilet in the girls’ room at school again” 200 times. “I was hoping to avoid that – That’s why I didn’t tell at first,” Nancy explains, “You came awfully close to getting it a lot worse than that,” I point out, “Next time, you’d be wise to come clean from the beginning.” “I also expect you to cooperate in our investigation as to who actually did mess those panties and hide them there,” I tell her, “I expect you to come forward with any information you may think of as to who might want to get you placed on toilet suspension – especially with your big FIGURE SKATING competition coming up.” “Yes, sir,” she tells me.

I then authorize the TVPC to begin a full-scale investigation into this matter. “But at least we can now close the investigation into that clogged toilet,” Mrs. Johns points out.

Before moving on to the next case, my attention is diverted to a little commotion in along “Defendants’ Row.” “Defendants’ Row” is what we call the first row facing the TVPC where girls sit and wait for their turn to face the TVPC. I’m surprised to see Topanga, a well-endowed junior, sitting there crying into her hands. Her jeans are completely wet in the crotch area, but I have a feeling that isn’t her biggest problem now. Topanga is currently serving a toilet suspension and the pained expression on her face along with the odd way that she is sitting, tell me that her panties are more than just wet. “What’s wrong, Topanga?” I ask the likeable but toilet-troubled junior beauty. “I just messed in my panties again,” she says through her tears. “I was trying to hold it in, but I had been holding it practically all day and I just couldn’t hold it any longer,” she explains, “And now it just all came out in my panties.” Furthermore, even though her jeans are clearly wet already, she is fidgeting around like she has to go some more. Such is how it goes on toilet suspension sometimes. As long as we are talking with Topanga, we might as well take her case next.

Trying to compose herself as she takes the podium, you can see her grimace with each step she takes – no doubt feeling the load in her panties. “I’d like the TVPC to consider my appeal for a reduction in my punishment,” she tells us, “I respectfully request that the TVPC reduce my time on toilet suspension and restore my privileges to use the school toilets as soon as possible.” Obviously, this case is a punishment appeal – an instance when a girl exercises her right to re-appear before the TVPC to have her case reviewed. The purpose, of course, is for a girl to get her punishment reduced. In this case, as in most punishment appeals cases, it involves the TVPC’s most dreaded punishment – the toilet suspension.

Topanga has been on toilet suspension for a week now and she has one more week to go. This (along with a week in detention and a 500 times writing assignment) was her punishment for leaving class without permission to go to the girls’ room. This was not only her second offense on this particular charge but her second offense in the same class – specifically her 5th period History class with Mr. Feeney. Mr. Feeney is a very strict teacher that doesn’t give girls’ room passes no matter how bad a girl has to go. The TVPC is usually somewhat lenient THE FIRST TIME a desperate girl bolts from the classroom to the girls room without permission, but Topanga is learning the hard way that no such leniency exists THE SECOND TIME a girl does that.

“I’d like you to consider that I only left class like that because I was really desperate for the girls’ room,” Topanga explains, “I only went because I really would have done a mess in my panties if I didn’t.” “I’m really tired of messing in my panties – I really hate it when that happens,” Topanga continues, softly crying, “I’m really sorry that I didn’t listen to Mr. Feeney, but all I could think about at the time was trying not to mess in my panties again.” “I’m really sorry especially that it happened a second time,” she says, “But I always seem to have to go in History class and Mr. Feeney never lets anyone go to the girls’ room.”

“It’s admirable that you didn’t want to go in your pants, Topanga,” I tell her, “But teachers are under no obligation to let you go to the girls’ room during class and we simply cannot have girls defying their teachers.” “Maybe you did avoid going in you pants that one day,” I point out to Topanga, “But how many times are you going to end up going in your pants through 2 weeks of toilet suspension?” “I’ve wet my pants everyday on toilet suspension so far and some days, more than once,” she answers, “I’m still really wet from before and I’m barely holding on to keep from doing it in my pants again.” “But wetting my pants isn’t the worst of it by a long shot,” she continues, “Sure it’s embarrassing and uncomfortable and everything, but it’s nothing compared to the other thing.” “I can’t even describe how bad it feels to have to do the other thing and know that you’re not allowed to go do that in the toilet,” she explains, crying even harder now at the thought of that, “Nothing is worse than feeling all that coming out in your panties and knowing that all you can do is sit there and mess yourself.”

“That’s what happens when you’re on toilet suspension,” I remind her, “That’s why it usually does wonders to teach a girl a lesson.” “Yes, sir – That’s just it, sir,” she reasons, “I’m here to tell you that I’ve already learned my lesson from my first week on toilet suspension.” “I promise you that I’ve already learned my lesson – I promise you that I’ll never leave class without permission again,” she tells us, “It just isn’t worth it – it just isn’t worth getting placed on toilet suspension.” “It’s better just to mess in your panties that one time if you have to,” she continues, “That’s better than leaving class and getting put on toilet suspension where you’ll end up messing in your panties a lot more.” As the well-spoken junior speaks her impassioned plea for a punishment reduction, she is hopping from foot to foot, obviously in serious desperation to urinate some more.

“I know I’ve only been on toilet suspension for a week and I have another week to go,” she tells us, “But this is the fourth time that I’ve messed in my panties on toilet suspension already.” “I’ve already messed in my panties more in 1 week on toilet suspension than most girls mess in their panties in 2 weeks on toilet suspension,” she argues, “I’m really telling you that I have learned my lesson and I’ve learned it the hard way.” “I’ve already learned my lesson and will never do it again,” she repeats, “Please don’t make me finish my whole toilet suspension – Please let me have my toilet privileges back.”

It’s not often that the TVPC grants a girl a punishment appeal, but Topanga makes a pretty convincing case. As part of her appeal, we review her original Violation Report. That report makes it clear that when she left Mr. Feeney’s class, she was careful not to be disrespectful to Mr. Feeney and she did it with only minimal disruption to the class. Apparently, she even apologized to Mr. Feeney at the time and told him she was only doing it because she was so desperate to go to the girls’ room. Had this not been the case, we would not even consider granting her appeal and quite frankly, she probably would have gotten more than 2 weeks on toilet suspension in the first place.

“Your punishment appeal is hereby granted,” I tell a suddenly smiling Topanga and note for the record, “Your toilet suspension is hereby reduced from 2 weeks to 1 week.” In keeping with the usual practice in cases like this – specifically cases when a toilet suspension is reduced – Topanga will have to serve an alternative punishment in lieu of not serving another week on toilet suspension. Topanga will be spending a week of 3rd period study hall sitting on a toilet in the Main Corridor girls’ room and she’ll have to write another 500 times of “I will not leave class without permission to go to the girls’ room again.” Neither is a pleasant prospect to be sure, but for her, getting off toilet suspension, is pretty much all that matters.

Topanga holds out her wrist – a wrist wearing the dreaded red wristband indicating that a girl is on toilet suspension. Apparently, she’s expecting it to be cut off now and she probably intends to make a mad dash down the hall to the girls’ room to relieve her swollen bladder. Unfortunately, it’s not quite that simple. “Actually, your 1 week on toilet suspension doesn’t end until tomorrow,” I inform her, “They’ll cut off that wristband in the principal’s office tomorrow morning.” “In the meantime, you’re still on toilet suspension until tomorrow,” I explain, “You’re still going to have to wait to take care of whatever it is that you’ve gotta do now.” With that, she lets out an audible grimace – I don’t think she can wait much longer. I’m not sure Topanga can even move now without losing control of her bladder. But she’s still happy because tomorrow she’ll be allowed to use the toilet in school again. Let’s just hope the need to go doesn’t happen in Mr. Feeney’s class again.

[Arnold Ziffel]

Toilet Violations Punishment Committee

For out next case, we have Kimberly, a pretty and outgoing senior. I am quite surprised to see her charged with messing in her panties – something she hasn’t done since she was a freshman. That’s not to say that she hasn’t had any other violations in that time – like smoking in the girls’ room and leaving class without permission to use the girls’ room this year – but she just hasn’t gone in her pants. She is being charged by Mrs. Garrett, one of our cafeteria monitors with committing this dirty deed in the cafeteria during her lunch period. Why she didn’t just go and use the girls’ room right there is anyone’s guess – DIFFERENT STROKES for different folks, I guess.

“I guess I have to plead guilty,” she says with a tinge of both anger and sarcasm, “But I just want you and everyone else to know that it wasn’t my fault.” “Who’s fault was it?” asks Mrs. Crabtree, a member of the TVPC. “It was Mrs. Garrett’s fault,” Kimberly explains, “She wouldn’t let me go to the girls’ room when I asked – I told her that I had to go bad, but she just wouldn’t let me.” “I did so let you,” our cafeteria monitor snaps back and just as she is about to say more, I stop her. “It says here that this happened during your lunch period,” I point out as I double check the Violation Report filed by Mrs. Garrett in this case, “Since when do we need to ask permission to go to the girls’ room during lunch?” “Since we don’t want to use the girls’ room across form the cafeteria,” Mrs. Garrett points out, “The problem was that she wanted to go up to the girls’ room on the second floor and I wouldn’t give her permission for that.” “I told her to use the girls’ room right there, but apparently that wasn’t good enough for her,” she adds. There is indeed a girl’s room right across the hall from the school cafeteria down in the basement of the building. Since its right there across from the cafeteria, girls on their lunch period are allowed to move freely between that girls’ room and the cafeteria. A lot of girls do take care of their business during their lunch period because it is so convenient and you don’t even need permission to go. Of course, we have monitors in the hallway to make sure the girls stay in that area and don’t wander the halls during lunch.

“Now what’s this about wanted to go to the 2nd Floor girls’ room?” I ask the senior. “I wanted to use a different girls’ room than the one by the cafeteria, that’s for sure,” Kimberly states emphatically, “Do you have any idea how many girls are going in and out of that girls’ room during a lunch period? – Some girls even hang out in there during their whole lunch period.” “Obviously, I had to take a dump,” she tells us, “Can’t I at least get a little privacy for that?” “I don’t mind using the Cafeteria girls’ room to pee in – it’s there so girls can pee in there during lunch,” she argues, “But no way am I going to take a dump in there – especially during a lunch period.” “It’s just to busy in there for that,” she adds, “Nobody takes a dump in there.”

“First of all, proper young ladies do not ‘take a dump’,” I tell her, “Proper young ladies defecate or move their bowels.” “Second of all, plenty of girls defecate in that girls’ room during their lunch period and at other times,” I explain, “Obviously, it’s a full service girls’ room – It obviously isn’t only there for girls to urinate in.” “Having that girls’ room there by the cafeteria makes it very convenient for girls to use during their lunch period,” I explain further, “And if you’re foolish enough not to take advantage of that when you really have to go, then you’ll just have to suffer the consequences.”

The mess in Kimberly’s panties is actually quite a big one – she obviously did it all in her panties before getting to the girls’ room – but I don’t think it’s quite enough to give her an enhanced punishment because of it. It is indeed quite shameful, especially for a senior, and I certainly don’t like how she’s tried to blame it on Mrs. Garrett instead of herself. But still it’s only her first accident offense of the school year and actually the first since she was a freshman. Mostly because of the other violations on her school toilet record this year, I sentence her to 2 days detention and to write 200 times, “I will not soil my panties in school again.”

For our last case, we have a visit from Mr. Kotter, one of our Social Studies teachers. He has charged Anji, a very pretty, well-spoken and self-assured junior, with using a boys’ room – specifically the New Edition boys’ room and more specifically that she defecated in the New Edition boys’ room during 5th period this morning. “Is that correct, Mr. Kotter?” I ask since this seems like a strange thing for the normally mild-mannered and well-behaved girl to do. “Yes sir, Mr. Chairman,” he affirms, “And I also want to bring charges against her boyfriend Jake.” “You also want to charge Jake with defecating in the boys’ room?” I ask with a smile, “I think that’s where he’s supposed to do it.” “Not exactly, Mr. Chairman, he says, also with a smile, “I’m really not sure what to charge Jake with or how this all works with that new TVPC we have now that punishes boys as well as girls.” “Perhaps I should just explain it all from the beginning?” he asks. “I think that’s a good idea,” I tell him.

“It’s like my Uncle Harry used to say to my Aunt Rose,” Mr. Kotter begins – obviously starting one of his famous jokes – but I stop him. “Please Mr. Kotter, just stick to the facts of the case,” I tell him. “I was heading into the boys’ room in the New Edition myself – you know, a little too much coffee this morning,” he says, “And then I see Jake just standing there staring directly into one of the stalls.” “I wonder what he is looking at, so I go over for a closer look,” he continues, “And then I see Anji in the stall pulling up her pants and zipping up.” “I didn’t see anything of her private stuff,” Mr. Kotter assures us, “But I did see the toilet bowl before Anji flushed it and it was full of Anji’s bowel movement and her toilet paper.” “This was all in that one stall that doesn’t have a door on it,” he points out, “Apparently Anji was putting on a little show for Jake – taking care of her business – her #2 business – while she let Jake watch.”

Though these two have not seen much of this TVPC (Anji has prior violations for clogging the toilet with her bowel movements and one for using to much toilet paper), they are pretty well-known at our companion TVPC across the hall. Jake, in particular, was recently punished by that TVPC for hiding out in the girls’ room and masturbating while listening to girls defecating in the other stalls. Though spared a toilet suspension in that case, he was punished quite severely for that as it was her second offense for masturbating in a school bathroom. Though it is not Jake who is charged in this case (at least not yet!) I have to wonder about that. Since Anji is the one accused this time(and because Anji usually speaks for the 2 of them anyway), I ask her to explain.

“Jake didn’t do anything wrong – he was only in the boys’ room like he’s supposed to be,” Anji states emphatically, “If anyone has to be punished that should only be me.” “That remains to be determined about Jake,” I tell her, “But I really hope that you’re not about to tell me that it was only coincidence that he happened to show up in the boys’ room at the same time that you – A GIRL! – decided to use that very same boys’ room.”
“No, sir – I guess you’ve already figured out that we went to the boys’ room together,” she tells me, somewhat dejectedly, apparently suddenly aware that she’s going to have to tell the truth.” “It’s just that I decided to let him watch me go to the bathroom,” she explains, “I thought that it was better that we do that in the boys’ room instead of the girls’ room.” “I thought he’d get a toilet suspension if he got caught in the girls’ room again,” she clarifies, “So I thought it was better that I used the boys’ room and let him watch me in there.”

“Well, you could have just done your business in the girls’ room and let your boyfriend wait outside,” I tell her, “That’s how most girls at this school do it.” “Yes, sir,” she answers politely, and takes a deep breath as she prepares to explain further. “I guess we all know that Jake likes to watch girls going to the bathroom – especially when it’s #2,” she says, “It’s just something that he likes to do and he is really a great guy – he’s the best boyfriend that I’ve ever had.” “It was a little weird at first, but I don’t mind it so much when he watches me,” Anji points out, “He makes it up to me in other ways.” “He is so sweat,” she adds. She goes on to explain that they usually go to her house after school and she goes to the bathroom for him there. “But for like almost 2 weeks now, I’ve really had to go at school,” Anji continues, “I haven’t been able to hold it in until I got home, so I couldn’t go in front of him.” “Sure, I could pee and that’s OK,” she clarifies, “But that’s not what he really likes.” All the while, Jake is standing there stoically and I’m wondering if he really appreciates what a wonderful girlfriend he has.

She goes on to tell us that Jake was feeling really desperate to watch her doing a bowel movement and once again today, she had to go at school and she knew she couldn’t hold it in until she got home. “I didn’t want Jake to get in trouble for going into the girls ‘room again,” she points out, “He had to write like 4,000 sentences last time and I thought his arm was going to fall off.” “I didn’t want to see him have to do that again,” she adds, “And I was thinking that this time, it could even be worse.” “You didn’t help him by writing any of those sentences for him, did you?” asks Mrs. Karbopple, a member of the TVPC. “No Ma’am,” she answers, “I brought him warm water to soak his hand in and I made him coffee so he could stay awake to write the sentences, but I didn’t write any of them myself.”

“So rather than get him in trouble by watching you in the girls’ room, you decided to risk getting into trouble yourself, by using the boys’ room where he could watch you?” I ask her. “Yes, sir – I was hoping the punishment wouldn’t be as bad for me if we got caught,” she admits, “And I was hoping that it wouldn’t be that embarrassing for me to be using the boys’ room.” “You came pretty close to Jake not being the only one that saw you doing your business,” Mr. Kotter points out. “And that reminds me of when my Uncle Harry saw my Aunt Rose…….,” Mr. Kotter starts another joke before I stop him. “Thank you for your report, Mr. Kotter,” I tell him.

Fortunately for Anji, she has a very good toilet record (as I’ve said, unintentionally clogging the toilet and using to much toilet paper were her only previous offenses this year) because the TVPC is pretty divided on the severity of her punishment. We do decide, however, that given that this is her first offense on this type of thing, and that she was only doing it for her boyfriend, and that it probably was better for her to sacrifice her own dignity by using the boys’ room than her boyfriend invading the privacy of others in the girls’ room, a more lenient – but not too lenient – punishment is the most appropriate.

She first gets a 250 times writing assignment – specifically, “I will not defecate in the boys’ room in school again.” She also gets 3 days of detention. But instead of regular detention, she’ll have to spend it standing in the corner facing the wall. “You’ll also wear a sign on your back stating, ‘I defecated in the boys’ room’” I tell her, “That way everyone will be able to see what you’ve done.” “Yes, sir,” she acknowledges, her head bowed in shame. “But I’m warning you, young lady,” I tell her, “That should this happen again, your punishment will be much, much worse.” “I could arrange to have you do all your business in the boys’ room for a month or so – That’s a new punishment option we have now,” I tell her, “Some boys just got sentenced by the other TVPC to only use the girls’ rooms,” I point out, “And you could very well find yourself in the same position if you are not careful.”

As for Jake, an exhaustive check of TVPC regulations surprisingly reveals that he’s done nothing wrong. I guess you could say it was wrong of him to put his girlfriend in that situation, but it would seem that he committed NO toilet violation in doing so. He was in the boys’ room where he is allowed to be and since Anji gave him permission to watch her on the toilet, there is no invasion of her privacy. He even did his watching from outside the actual toilet stall, so we can’t even get him on the minor violation of having 2 people in the toilet stall at one time. “You’re very lucky, young man,” I tell Jake, “You are lucky you didn’t commit any violations here and I can’t even begin to tell you how lucky you are to have a girlfriend like Anji.”

So concludes another session of the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee. Meeting adjourned at 4:10 PM.

[spandexman]

Welcome back Kotter

Gabe would be proud to be included. Mrs. Johns is a true toilet pervert, love her. Great report as always. Thanks.

[Narada]

Nice post! I especially enjoyed the bit with Anji and Jake from my TVPC posts! I would kill to have a girlfriend as understanding as her. I caught the Nancy Kerrigan and Tonya Harding bits as well...

[pantiespooper]

THAT is AWEFUL!

Why would anyone make a girl stand in a corner with a sign on her back saying she pooped in the boys room ---- oops... deficated...?

It was in a potty, and not in her panties (which seems a bit of a sacrilege anyway - it belonged in her panties --- oops, that is only MY opinion, I guess). You make it sound like she did something awful like pooping on the floor, right by the door so that everyone that came in would see her huge pile... That might warrant what she got...

Nope, that was too much...

[Narada]

Geez, pantiespooper--relax! It's not like he ordered her to be caned or something! I have to say, there have been worse TVPC punishments, such as the boy who had to wear panties another girl pooped in for a month! Rather liked that one--I may do it again!

[pantiespooper]

Ok, Im sorry again

Actually, what that boy endured, he probably relished after a day or two. I probably would have too.

Oh, I don't know - maybe I am getting too particular in my thinking... I am an engineer after all, I suppose I am supposed to think that way. Guess I just thought the council was too hard on her.... that's all. I don't remember seeing other women's views to this treatment. Were there any?

[Narada]

No, you're the only one. Heck, you're probably the only woman who ever posts comments on these TVPC stories, pantiespooper!

[Arnold Ziffel]

Thanks to everyone for their comments.

As to Anji, what she did wasn't the most serious of offenses, but she did sneak into the boys' room where she didn't belong and she did do her bowel movement in there -- admittedly in the toilet. She risked not only the boys seeing her (as Mr. Kotter almost did) but also seeing the boys there. The boys have a right to go the boys' room and do their business without a girl being in there. She did get the detention standing in a corner with the sign on her back, but she only got for three days -- not even a whole week. If you had done her bowel movement on the floor in there (or even on the girls' room floor, for that matter) that would have been way more serious. She definately would have been placed on toilet suspension and her detention time (a lot more than 3 days) would be spent cleaning the bathrooms. Thanks for you input, though.