A smoking fetish story with a piss theme

[bazzle]

Saturday

Laura rolled over and could hear a distant hacking cough, “that’s not me is it?” she said to herself before needing to cough herself, “nope that was me” she said before coughing again. “ugh my head” she said to herself as she leaned over to the bedside table and grabbed a cigarette and lit it with a double pump, opened both green eyes and gingerly sat up to see she was still on top of the duvet naked from the waist down.

“Oh Karen must be still downstairs” Laura said to herself, hearing another distant cough come from downstairs, followed by her own almighty coughing fit. Another double pump and exhale her cough was under control.

“Fuck my head, that last vodka did it, didn’t it?!” Laura asked to herself as she swung her legs out of the bed and gingerly got up and shuffled to the bathroom. She gently kicked her sodden yellow pyjama shorts to the side and out her the way with an “Oh” and putting her hand against the wall for support, once the world stopped spinning she took a large inhale of her cigarette as she sat down on the toilet and exhaled.

She got up, wiped, dropped her cigarette in the bowl and flushed. Looked towards the window sill to see empty pack, tutted and slowly padded down the stairs. As she got to the bottom of the stairs she could see Karen sprawled out on the sofa smoking a cigarette.

“Morning Kaz, Coffee?” Law asked as she got to the bottom of the stairs
.
“Morning to you too” Karen said, “I see I didn’t get to bed last night” she giggled.

“Somehow I did!” replied Laura “when did Sean leave?” she asked.

“No idea, thought he might have been up there with you?” enquired Karen.

“I wish!” replied Laura as she padded across the living room to pick a cigarette out of the pack next to the ashtray; she lit it with a double pump. “That’s better” she said after her exhale “Coffee time!” she stated as she wobbled her naked ass towards to kitchen.
“On my way” said Karen inhaling on her cigarette. She gingerly leaned against the edge of the sofa and exhaled through her nose as she shuffled off the sofa.

As the coffee machine whirred, Laura dangled her cigarette as she retrieved a couple of clean coffee cups from the cupboard and got the milk out of the fridge.

“Law, you realise you haven’t got any pants on?” Karen asked before taking an inhale on her cigarette whilst looking at Laura’s naked bottom wiggling around in front of her as she made the coffee.

“Yup my shorts had an accident last night!” she giggled then coughed. “You’ve seen my arse plenty of times over the years though” Laura smiled and slapped her thighs.

“Too true”, replied Karen, laughed then coughed again, which she tried to solve with a further deep inhale on her cigarette.

“Here is your coffee” Laura said putting it on the kitchen table and grabbing her own.

“So Law, what are you thinking if anything for today? I was thinking I should go home at some point” Karen asked.

“The cupboards are bare of any food, so how about Spoons for brunch/lunch?” suggested Laura.

“Ohh we could do, could murder a fry up” said Karen with an exhale.

“Shall we finish the coffees, I may need to get dressed and shall we head in to town?” Laura said as a plan.

With that the doorbell rang, “Is that going to be Sean?” Asked Karen

“No idea, but you will need to answer it for me!” Laura said whilst pointing towards her naked lower half.

“Oh good point” Karen said thoughtfully stubbing out her cigarette getting up.

“On our way” shouted Laura followed by a deep cough for using more of her lungs than anticipated. “Ah I know where a skirt is” Laura said to herself out loud as she also stubbed her cigarette out, got up and followed Karen towards the door.

“Hang on Sean” said Karen as she attempted to open the door.

“No problem” Sean said through the door.

“Hey how you doing?” she asked once the door was open.

“Not too bad, how are both your heads?” he asked.

“Oh we are surviving on coffee at the moment, do you want one?” Karen asked

“Why not, yes!” he replied

“Great come in to the kitchen” she said, forgetting about Laura’s nakedness in the kitchen.

“Cool” Sean said as he followed Karen in to the house.

“I will be with you guys in a minute” Laura said as they passed the living room, as she was bent over, with her bum in the air in the process of trying to pull up a skirt up her legs, she had found and picked it up off the floor, her large naked ass, was highlighted by the dimness of the living room, Sean did a double take as he walked past.

“So when did you leave us last night?” asked Karen

“When you had both had nearly passed out! Replied Sean, “I helped Laura up the stairs as she asked me to, as you were practically asleep” he said.

“Oh I see” Karen said, “We may have had a little too much vodka to drink” she said guiltily as she grabbed a cigarette from the pack on the table and lit it.

“Sorry about that” said Laura as she came in to the kitchen still rearranging the skirt, “had to sort my modesty out”

“It’s ok, think you revealed most to me last night!” Sean said smiling.

“Oh, did I” said Laura also grabbing a cigarette from the pack, and having a hungry inhale from the embarrassment.

“Maybe” Sean said smiling “I did help you up the stairs before I left” he replied.

“Oh is that when you left?” Laura asked with her exhale, “Also do you want a coffee?” she asked picking up her now empty mug.

“Yer, why not, got a bit of time before I am needed up the cricket club”

---
Following 20 minutes of frantically getting ready as to not make Sean too late, Karen was in the back of the car, and Laura was sitting in the passenger side with a cigarette in her hand hanging it out the window as Sean gave them a lift to Weatherspoon’s as it was ‘sort of’ on his way to the cricket club.

“Thanks hunny for the lift” said Laura taking an inhale “makes it easier, the house is empty of food!” she exhaled mostly out the window.

“I would love to join you but, I’ve got to be manly and play cricket” Sean mused “you are more than welcome to come up and watch, or I could come and find you two afterwards?” he asked

“We will be either still in ‘Spoons or back at the house” suggested Laura inhaling again on her cigarette.

“If you are still in ‘Spoons when I finish cricket that would be an impressive drinking session” Sean mooted.

“You saw us last night” suggested Karen from the back seat.

“Ah, good point” Sean said. “Either way I can text you and then come and find you”

“Cool” Laura said exhaling and flicking her cigarette butt out the window “I look forward to it”

---
“I think Sean is keen on one of us” Laura said before putting a sausage piece in her mouth, as they sat outside in the smoking area of Weatherspoons.

“Yer, think you might be right, not sure, it could be both of us!” Karen joked “but how naked did he see you yesterday?” she asked

“Don’t make me choke” Laura said with a mouthful grabbing her wine glass and taking a gulp to help her swallow. “I don’t know, I woke up on the bed without my shorts on, but they were in the bathroom” Laura stated avoiding the reason for them being in the bathroom.

“Did he get you in to bed?” Karen asked with her exhale.

“Not sure, maybe!” Laura said

“Well” Karen said inhaling on her cigarette, “it’s just that he seemed to want to see us both later” she said with her exhale pushing her bacon on her fork around the beans covered plate in front of her.

“Maybe we are just both good fun” said Laura thoughtfully looking at Karen whilst her baked beans dropped off her fork.

“That will be it!” Karen said taking a draw on her cigarette.

---
“Shall I get another bottle on the way back from the toilet?” Asked Karen

“Absolutely, its doing wonders for my headache” Laura said taking a gulp to finish her wine, putting the glass back on the table and then having a deep inhale on her cigarette.

“It’s certainly agreeing with me” Karen said stubbing out her cigarette “Will be back as quickly as possible” she said as she got up.

Laura got her phone out her bag and dangled her cigarette whilst she messaged Sean.

“About to open second bottle, shouldn’t be too drunk for you this evening Lx” she sent thinking he would see it much later.

“Law its only 230, you are going to be pissed as a fart” came the instant response.

“Aren’t you meant to be cricketing now?” she replied.

“I am, batting 1st so waiting my turn” Sean replied.

“Ok, not sure what that means, see you later Lx” she replied

“If you want, I will explain in great detail later with a beer. https://y7s8g9a4.ssl.hwcdn.net/images/smilies/smile.png ” Sean’s message said.

“Great… Yawn https://y7s8g9a4.ssl.hwcdn.net/images/smilies/wink.png Lx” she replied.

Laura checked her social media, nothing of that took her fancy again and put her phone back in her bag and inhaled deeply on the cigarette, “so he still interested in us” she said to herself as she exhaled her smoke and then smiled.

Karen returned with carrying the new bottle of white wine.

“Hey Sweetie, here we go” she said placing the bottle on the table, grabbing a cigarette from her pack, lighting up with a deep inhale and then sat down as she exhaled and proceeded to pour the wine.

---
As Karen carefully topped up both wine glasses “So Law, what we are going to do this afternoon?” she asked “Not sure I can now think quiet straight on a plan” she said followed by her usual deep inhale.

“Yer I know the feeling, but as Sean is planning on finding us wherever we are, we can either stay here by getting a couple of drinks in when this bottle is finished, or head home?” Laura replied manicuring her cigarette on the full ashtray on the table between them, then taking her own deep inhale.

“Are you sure he is going to bother to come and find us drunkards?” Karen asked.

“He said he would do, I can’t see a reason why not!” replied Laura “We are sexy drunkards!” she laughed then coughed.

“He is mad, but fit!” giggled Karen, followed by another deep inhale.

---
“Cricket has finished early- we won- where are you?” Sean messaged.

“Tipsy on bus home x” Laura’s reply

“Shall I get some fish and chips on my way over?” Sean asked

“Oh food, good idea! Lx”

“Chips for 2 or 3?” Sean asked

“3 x with mushy peas please https://y7s8g9a4.ssl.hwcdn.net/images/smilies/smile.png Lx”

---

[bazzle]

The final ending..

Laura and Karen were sitting slouched on the tatty burgundy sofa with their ever present cigarettes between their fingers waiting for Sean to arrive before opening the next bottle of wine, they had gone via Tescos to stock up on wine and cigarettes.

“It’s been a fun afternoon of lunch and wine” said Karen “Thank you” she said with an exhale.

“Yup and we maybe should have invited Zoe” replied Laura followed by a lazy inhale.

“Oh yer, I was so focused on food, I think we forgot to!” replied Karen with her exhale.

“Shh, we just won’t tell her!” as Laura giggled and then inhaled on her cigarette.

“Sounds like a plan” Karen said before inhaling deeply on her cigarette.

Laura stubbed out her cigarette in the ashtray, “going for piss, will be back”.

“Cool” said Karen as she exhaled and reached across for the remote control and flipped on the telly as Laura got up and padded off towards the stairs.

As she got to the top of the stairs and almost in the bathroom the doorbell went.

“Karen can you get that, it will be Sean” Laura shouted down from the bathroom.

“Sean, on my way” said Karen loudly over the TV, stubbing out her cigarette and exhaling as she got up of the sofa.

“Evening Sean” Laura said as she opened the door leaning against the wall for support “how was the cricket?”

“Hey Karen, It was good, shall we get in? The chips are getting cold!” Sean said holding up with the carrier bag of food in one hand and a four pack of Stella in the other.

“Of course, take them through to the kitchen, we can sort it out from there” Karen replied leading Sean through to the kitchen. Karen noticed a cigarette pack and lighter on the kitchen table, shock out a cigarette and lit it.

“Cool, are there plates or shall we have it from the paper?” Asked Sean

“Don’t know, shall have it on the paper, saves on washing up!” replied Karen dangling her cigarette whilst unwrapping the paper surrounding the chips.

“Good plan!” said Sean

“Oh do you want a drink? We haven’t opened the wine just yet?” asked Karen

“You crack on with the wine, I will open one of my beers” Sean said as put the three remaining beers in the fridge.

“Hey Sean, thanks for bringing food!” said Laura as she breezed the kitchen she was just touching the wall for support, she leaned over the wrapped food, retrieved a cigarette and lit it, as she entered the room it was evident to Karen and Sean she had just sprayed body spray over herself.

“It’s ok, I needed to eat too!” said Sean

“Do you want some wine?” Laura said dangling the cigarette and opening the fridge and taking a bottle wine out.

“Nah. Kaz did offer, but I brought my own beer!” said Sean

“Cool, have you got our glasses Kaz?” Laura said as she opened the bottle.

“Nope, will get them for us now” said Karen inhaling on her cigarette and as she turned she exhaled and went to the living room to get the wine glasses.

---
I’ve had my first pint after sport syndrome, does anyone want a top up?” asked Sean getting up from the kitchen chair to get another beer from the fridge, having practically downed the can.

“Yes for me” said Laura before lighting her post meal cigarette and handing the pack to Karen

“Rude not to” said Karen lighting her own cigarette.

“That was good fish and chips” said Laura wiping the last remaining ketchup away from her mouth with the back of her hand and then inhaling on the cigarette.

“They were rather nice” said Karen “put I am now full” making a point of undoing the top button of her white linen trousers and letting her small belly flop out whilst she exhaled “might need to just eat a salad tomorrow!”

They all laughed.

“Here are your wine girls” said Sean as he passed the full wine glasses across and sipped his beer can.

“Thanks Sean” Karen said as she took a gulp of the wine and inhale on her cigarette.

“Shall we retire to the living room?” Laura asked as she exhaled her cloud of blue smoke up to the light fitting.

“Yup sounds good” said Karen ashing her cigarette in the ashtray on the kitchen table and then dangling it whilst she held on to her wine glass and stood up, and had to grab her trousers as they started to fall down her slim body. She carefully walked with the others in the living room.

“Do you want me to empty that ashtray and move the table for you?” Sean asked as they entered the living room “it might make access easier for you?” he followed up.

“It’s ok, I will do my dirty work myself” Said Laura still dangling her cigarette picking up and carefully trying not to spill the very full ashtray towards the kitchen “but you could lift and move the table”

“Sure” said Sean as he gently repositioned the occasional table in front of the sofa for Karen and Laura.

Karen placed her now three quarters full wine glass on the repositioned table and flumped down on to the sofa and inhaled deeply on her current cigarette and stayed in the slouched position.

“Think I am a little full and pissed” said Karen casually stroking her belly revealing the top of her pink underwear to Sean.

“It’s a Saturday night, it’s allowable” Sean said taking a swig of his beer. “Think Laura would agree to that!”

“Agree to what?” Laura asked from the kitchen.

“On Saturday night you are allowed to be pissed and full?” Asked Sean

“I’m pissed most nights, what’s Saturday got to do with it?” Joked Laura, as she padded back in to the living room inhaling her cigarette and carrying the now empty ashtray. “You don’t need to undress for me” Laura said bluntly after noticing Karen’s trousers were undone.

“I’m feeling a little full!” said Karen before inhaling deeply on her cigarette.

"Sod it Kaz, just take the trousers off," Laura said before inhaling on her cigarette " might as well be comfortable, I would want to be" she said with her exhale "I've given up fighting my belly" said whilst Laura stroked her extended belly. “That is why most of my clothes are elasticated” said Laura with her thumb in her skirt pulling it away from her body and giggling.

Karen exhaled, giggled and coughed then had a large gulp of wine, then then lifted her body slightly off sofa and pulled her linen trousers down, revealing her red thong "You don't mind Sean? Those trousers were getting tight!" Karen asked before taking a deep inhale.

"Erm no, better to be comfortable!" Sean said taking a gulp of his beer and couldn't help but stare at her long legs and knickers. “Do you guys have matching tattoos on your thighs?” Sean asked “I may have noticed Eeyore last night on Laura’s thigh”.

“Yes” giggled Karen, “I have Piglet on my thigh, Laura has Eeyore and Zoe has Winne the Pooh!” We got them ages ago one drunken Sunday afternoon.

“That’s a variation on undecipherable Chinese symbols!” Sean said taking a gulp of his beer “or the ‘tramp stamp’ on the lower back that was popular a few years ago!”

“I still think Eeyore on my thigh is cute” Laura said, lifting up her skirt far too high and stroking her tattoo on her upper leg.

“It must have been a nice thing to do as a group of friends” said Sean looking at their exhales and necking his beer, trying to avoid staring at both sets of revealed legs in front of him.

“Yup it was!” said Karen inhaling on her cigarette.

“It’s certainly not one of my regrets” Laura said ashing her cigarette in the ashtray and taking a double pump inhale.

---
Laura stretched, yawned and then coughed "So which one of you is in my bed and maybe between my thighs?” Laura giggled “and which one of you is on the sofa?" Laura asked after just about managing to light a fresh cigarette. Her feet were on the sofa and her short dress riding high up the thighs hiding nothing from Sean’s view in the corner.

"Shall I be gentlemanly and let you girls have the bed, and I will take the sofa?" Sean asked but not entirely convincingly from the corner chair.

"I won't complain about sleeping in the bed with Laura" said Karen still slouched on the sofa, before inhaling on her cigarette and drunkenly stroking her very damp gusset of her thong.

“Goody, I need my bed, I’m pissed, need a piss and did I say I am pissed?” Laura asked finishing off the vodka and coke with a slurp, wiping the dribble with the back of hand and then inhaling deeply on her cigarette.

“You may have done Lauz” Sean attempted humour “it’s been a good night girls!” said Sean looking around the room with piles of clothes and a rather refilled ashtray “I will make myself at home down here!”

Karen slumped off the sofa and sat cross legged on to the floor dangling her cigarette “I am nearly there Lauz, just need to get up again” and giggled and coughed in a cloud of exhaled smoke.

“I am right behind you” giggled Laura as she slumped on to the floor too with a coughing fit.

“Would it help you, if I got you both up?” Sean asked looking at the two drunken women smoking, giggling, coughing and wiggling around on the floor.

“Yes please! Laura said dangling her cigarette and offering up her hands and then giggling again.

Sean pulled her and then Karen upright “are you both ok for the stairs?” he asked in genuine concern watching them wobble around.

“Yup I’m good” said Laura stumbling over towards the door and the stairs.

“I will try to be good” giggled Karen as she followed Laura towards the stairs.

---
Sunday
Laura woke to her usual hacking cough, which woke Karen up for her to have her cough too.

Once they had both lit their cigarettes and double pumped and calmed their lungs down, they both sniffed the air.

“My head hurts, but can you smell food cooking?” Karen asked with her exhale

“I think so, but I don’t have any!” said Laura “it might be the neighbours burning their breakfasts!” she mooted.

“It’s smells nice, do you think they would mind if we gate crashed their breakfast?” asked Karen

“I might have to get dressed first” said Laura.

“Oh and me!” said Karen looking down at her naked chest.

With that they both stopped talking as they could hear clumping up the stairs, as is natural they pulled the duvet up over their chests.

“Knock, Knock, “Sean said as he poked his head around the door frame “ah you are both decent, Good morning you two”, “I thought I heard the dawn chorus of coughs coming from the awakening birds!” Sean said breezily from the doorway “I got up earlier and popped to Tesco got some sausages, bacon and eggs and have started making breakfast or brunch when you girls are ready”.

“It smells delicious” said Karen exhaling her cigarette “we will get dressed and be right down”

“Thank you ever so much Sean” Laura said stubbing her cigarette out in the ashtray.

“No problem, right better get back down, before I burn the bacon” Sean said as he turned around.

“Wow, isn’t he amazing” said Laura smiling and then grabbing a new cigarette, lighting it and having a gentle cough.

“Very much so, a man who cooks, that is so useful!” Karen said thoughtfully stubbing her cigarette out in the ashtray between them.

“Do you want one?” asked Laura

The end.....